Wednesday, November 30, 2005

happy face math

katie sent me this:

http://www.zoology.ubc.ca/~bio301/Pictures/HappyFaceMath.gif

it made my day :)

happy wednesday?

today is my next to last day of teaching this semester -- how weird is that?

today we talk about antiderivatives (they're not integrals until next week)... i feel like i'm talking about some strange sort of nemesis when i have to say anti-something that many times in a row.

heh.

Monday, November 28, 2005

november 28

today would have been grandma schumann/fischer's 77th birthday if she were alive today. the last several years, we've had joint thanksgiving/g-ma's birthday celebrations at her nursing home north of pittsburgh, but obviously this year the latter part was missing.

at any rate, here's a hodgepodge of g-ma memorabilia that's actually with me instead of at my parents house:

yay for family?


confirmation day


unlike my other grandma, this grandma wrote me more than half a sentence cards :)


roadtrips with grandma were always fun... with her legally blind getup before her cataract surgery, grandpa always called her "the happy hitchhiker" :P


grandma's 2nd wedding -- isn't she pretty?


all us family type people


g-ma, post first stroke -- still the same sense of humor and fantastic smile


home, sweet nursing home


just one more


so many things to admire about her... but most of all her faith:


... i just hope some day i'm half the person she was... she really was my hero.

and hey, for the first time in years, she's having the best birthday celebration ever. :)

happy birthday to my grandma.

the end.

Sunday, November 27, 2005

...

interview tomorrow.

moderately nervous.

wish me luck!

things that make me smile

* as i walked into church today, gail, a lady about my mom's age who was in "new member class" with me 2 years ago stopped me to comment "you've lost so much weight this year -- you look fantastic! i've been meaning to say something for a bit but i wanted to make sure you really were who i thought you were -- you look like a whole new person!"

* paul, another math grad student who i give a ride to church every week, shared his homemade leftover pumpkin pie with me after church. usually we chat in the car and then don't really run into each other until the next week. but, he commented, pie was made to be shared, so he might as well share it instead of making himself sick. whatever the motivation, free pumpkin pie is never bad.

* leigh played skipbo with me before getting to work this afternoon and i actually won for once (she's a sneaky opponent)

now, to get to work.

later dudes.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

hodgepodge

(1) i love my family.

i always have fun visiting aunt pris in pitt. of all my "next generation older" relatives, she's the one that's most a friend and least an "elder" to me, and i like that. never a bad thing to see her and just hang out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(2) i still miss my grandma.

yesterday, pris and i went to see roy (my step grandpa) at the nursing home. he's in the same nursing home as grandma used to be in, just down the hall. he's actually improving strength wise although he makes sense in spurts and makes not much sense in other spurts. we caught him during a particularly good hour. it's happy to see him a bit stronger each time i've been there this fall. he's not up to walking yet, but he's a speed demon pushing his own wheelchair down the hall and navigating between other people -- i was impressed.

what was strange was that priscilla and i went through his wedding album with him (the one from his wedding to my grandma in 1998), and it was really nice, but i hadn't seen it before. actually sitting there and looking at pre-stroke pictures of my grandma (which is something i haven't done in ages) and remembering her as she was before the strokes kinda trapped her a bit, and reflecting strongly on that for a little with roy and pris before pris and i stopped by her grave yesterday was strange. the other couple times i've been in pitt this fall and stopped by there, it numbs the "missing her" part if i'm just thinking of how she was the past 5 years and that she's no longer trapped in a stroke-ridden body. remembering her as she was 6-7 years ago brings the fact that she's gone a little more home.

oi.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(3) RENT makes a *fantastic* movie as well as a good musical. sure, they changed some of the settings, and departed a little more from act 2, but i was enthralled the whole time... i want it when it comes out on dvd. (i saw it tonight with scott, jared, and leigh) -- go see it, whether you've already seen the musical or not... it's a party

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(4) i forgot how fantastic the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe is -- i reread it in its entirety wednesday and thursday nights at aunt pris's house. it's an easy quick read, and i enjoyed remembering the details again even if the general story is all still in my head... i figure i can rip through the whole 7 book series fairly quickly if i feel like it, so prince caspian is next on the list

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(5) switchfoot's CDs learning to breathe and the beautiful letdown are fantastic too... brother has them and let me borrow them for the drive to pitt... i'm enthralled with several of the songs now that i hadn't heard before, and continue to enjoy the ones i already did know. it's a party

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(6) scott is crazy

he thinks that
(a) he's going to teach me to dance and/or get me to dance in public at some point in the forseeable future
(b) he can pick me up without hurting himself

i contend that stubborness will prevent (a), and i contend that (b) is impossible without him hurting himself... he hasn't proven otherwise on either.

arguing about both of these takes up 2/3 of mine and scott's conversations anymore... it's kinda funny

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(7) i wish personalities were easily transferable

that's a strange phrasing but...

earlier tonight, i stole scott's hat off his head and borrowed it for a bit. leigh and scott both commented that it looked fine but didn't fit my wardrobe, and i instantly replied "but budapest lara could pull it off... she's the best lara of all", to which scott replied "then you need to move budapest lara to new jersey"

i wish i knew how.

i was chatting about this with roommate just before break too. i like who i am best when i'm in budapest. there truly are different laras when i'm in different environments, and they're all reflections of me, but i'm the happiest when i'm budapest lara and i think budapest lara is the closest to the true lara. although there are perfectly logical reasons for why (for example) i don't think i'll completely ever be able to be budapest lara when not in budapest, it would be nice to figure out how to transfer at least some of that version of me to how i am in other places. or even in smaller context, scott and i agreed at dinner tonight that i've mellowed a lot in the past two years and it would be nice if i could rewind some parts of me to be two years ago lara if only to just be a little more adventuresome and more able to deal well with groups of people.

problem: i haven't figured out how to do that yet.

oi.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(8) the end. your turn. questions? comments? reactions? grudges? criticisms? profound thoughts? 1, 2, 3, go.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

happy thanksgiving break!

finally it's here!

this morning, i was ready earlier than i needed to be, so i decided to be nice and go buy candy. when my students sat through 45 minutes of class with me i let them each have a tootsie pop or a blow pop on the way out of class. that made them smile. :)

since i bought enough for all my students, knowing full well a number of them would be gone, but just to be safe, my 13 year old cousin in pittsburgh will reap the benefits and get a number of tootsie pops tomorrow, as did my brother earlier today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i finished a really fantastic book this afternoon. it's called do you think i'm beautiful? by angela thomas. i came across this author after hearing about another of her books on the NYC christian radio station. it was one of the better books i've read this year. all about how much God loves each of us individually... and each chapter was a different twist on that big theme trying to break through all the walls people typically put up between themselves and fully accepting being loved by God even after they believe that he does love them. it was a quality read, and i'm probably going to buy a copy to give to my mom for christmas. (sshhh, don't tell)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i didn't write about it on saturday when i first saw it, but brother and me saw "walk the line": the new movie about johnny cash... it was absolutely fantastic. the music is great, and from the news stories i saw later, it's a fairly accurate portrayal of his life too. i'd highly recommend seeing it multiple times even.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

scrubs season 2 dvd came in the mail yesterday finally -- it's a 3 dvd set, and i've already watched the first disc in its entirety in the past 24 hours... most of it last night with brother and a bit this afternoon with him too.... that show is so fantastic.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i think that's it. brother and i are ordering pizza and taking it easy tonight since it's freakin cold and windy tonight... we're leaving for pittsburgh early tomorrow too to try to get across PA before it's expected to snow hard in pitt (2pm and later in the afternoon)... we'll see how this works.

at any rate, happy thanksgiving to all, and catch you on the flip side!

:)

how'd you like to wake up to this?

radio dj (as my alarm goes off at 6:15am): "i think that we'd all have much better days and the world would be a happier place if we all woke up and did the chicken dance to start our day... don't you?"

(then they commenced playing the chicken dance... oi)

Monday, November 21, 2005

3 reasons it's useful to have a brother around

* when they visit, brothers notice things that are wrong with your house and set themselves to fix them (e.g. our bathroom sink had been draining slowly for awhile and we didn't care enough to do more than pour drano down it... brother made a hook out of wire and fished crap out of the sink until it worked normally again... not because i asked him, or because we noticed that that would do the job on our own because neither is true... he just did it on his own)

* when they visit, brothers do other nice things that don't need to be fixed... but just that they feel like doing (e.g. brother brought me a 13 inch color tv and put a splitter on the cord into my cable modem so that i have cable in my room too just like in the other rooms... he also gave me his old dvd player too... before today i had a VCR and a 4 inch black and white TV that picked up no channels whatsoever... now i have VCR, DVD player, and a color TV that picks up all the channels the rest of the house does... just because my brother is super nice)

* when brothers visit, it's a perfect excuse to not do your own work and spend your office hours playing cards on the floor of the office (given: this wouldn't have worked if it weren't the case that my students just had a test on friday and none of them came in, but it was an excuse to not be doing math)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

that sums up most of my day... in non-brother news, i had an excellent meeting with my advisor today too -- i had a productive time on the train to new york yesterday and we talked for most an hour about what i figured out... it was quality. tomorrow is teach all morning, then freedom til next monday. how yay is that?

night y'all.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

announcing my new exciting talent

apparently i've inherited one of my dad's traits that i didn't know i had in me -- a propensity for fainting in restaurants.

that's right -- today, for the third time in my life -- i passed out. the first two times were in europe in the shower (lovely to think about right?)... budapest in 2002, prague this past summer... from not getting enough sleep and then turning the warm water a little too high up and making my blood pressure momentarily plumment.

today, i was not in europe or in the shower. brother thought it would be fun to check out mars 2112 for dinner since he's heard me talk about it a bit.

if you've not been there, it's a new york theme restaurant where you're supposedly dining on mars. to get to mars, you take a spaceship ride with 2 dozen other people. brother and i were first in line for the next ride, when suddenly my heart started beating fast and my vision started getting spotty. i told my brother to take my purse while i got rid of my coat and went to sit on the stairs across the room. when i stayed there for more than a minute he came over, as did a few of the restaurant people... they gave me water and asked if i wanted anything else. while they were getting the water, brother was trying to talk to me but all i could hear was ringing in my ears and i was getting suddenly very hot and sweaty.

conclusion already then? we'd walked something along the order of 6-7 miles around new york this afternoon and i'd barely drank anything. honestly, i didn't feel thirsty, but that much effort running around without keeping hydrated is not a good thing, even when it's not hot out.

anyhow, after i finished the water they gave me we decided ryan should go on through the space ride and i'd go through the "zip route" (i.e. walk through another door in the room and meet him on the exit side of the ride). i waited there for about 2 minutes, and just before he came out, the ringing in my ears and the spots were back. brother bee-lined to me and asked:
brother: "are you ok?"
me: "not really"
brother: "do we need to go?"
me: "we need to go sit at a table..."

then here's my version:
brother said ok, and since my vision was spotty i closed my eyes and leaned against him to walk to a restaurant table, then as i leaned in more next thing i know he's saying "lara! lara!"
me: "what?"
brother: "you just fainted, is your head ok?"
me: "i did?... oh, i guess that's why i'm on the floor, huh?"

brother's version more matches up with the "need to sit at a table" comment, then he says he was two people behind me walking into the restaurant, and pretty much immediately as i took a step i fell straight forward like a piece of wood and came within 2 inches of hitting my head hard on the wall. i was out for all of 2 seconds.

we made it to a table and after downing 4 gigantic glasses of water and a chicken pot pie i was in much better shape for moving around.

but dude... that was new.

i totally knew it was coming too right before it happened, but there were no warning signs of feeling bad until about a minute ahead of time.

dehydration -- definitely wouldn't recommend it...

in other news:

* pastor j was not only visiting my NJ church this morning - he was our guest preacher... totally surprise... it was fantastic to have him back for a week!

* brother and i checked out the intrepid museum in new york for most of the afternoon. it's pretty freakin cool and a really good use of the space. the intrepid is a gigantic air craft carrier boat that went into service in WWII and served for vietnam and korea too and as a NASA retrieval vessel as well before being decommissioned. when it was retired, they made it into one of the world's largest floating museums... right in the hudson river in manhattan. you get to learn about all these planes and about the gigantic boat itself while ON the boat... and quite a few of the exhibits are really interactive. i'd highly recommend it.

* wandered around a bit for fun... then to mars... i already told what happened there.... and now we're home again.

sounds like lots of fun, right?

all good if when i fainted i hadn't rebanged up my right knee which was finally just about back to normal after the incident of 2 weeks ago... oi.

the end... happy sunday?

Saturday, November 19, 2005

happy saturday?

here's my day:
* aquarium
* ocean
* movie

the end.

the power of "i don't know"

Zookeeper Cringes At Parents Passing Misinformation To Kids -- having worked at a zoo for several summers, and having grown up with TONS more exposure to animals than the average person, this struck a chord.

in completely unrelated news, this made my day:



the end.

what a week

it's 2am

i just finished entering calc exam grades into my gradebook.... one of my sections is getting increasingly bipolar. there's a really good number of kids acing stuff, or at least doing reasonable well, a fair number whose scores keep going down, and not a lot in the middle. so the average is still respectable, but i don't know how to better encourage the lower score group. i want them ALL to do well, but i can't make them come in for help... oi. grading in the other sections is a bit different. sure scores are scattered... but they're not quite so distributed in two relatively disjoint groups. oi...

my brother is asleep on the couch. he got here well after midnight, closer to 12:30/1am. he's changed shape a lot in the past 6 months. more buff in the shoulders and arms from the work he does, but more of a gut too. it's just funny because i'm used to thinking of him as "baby brother" even though he's very much not a baby anymore and is much bigger than me anymore.

now that exam mania is done, tomorrow i'm free to have some fun. brother and i are thinking to go to the aquarium in newark. i've never been there. it was remodled and reopened under new management just earlier this year. we'll see how good it is and report back tomorrow. :P

now, to finally crash.

later dudes.

Friday, November 18, 2005

oddly enough

here are a sampling of the news stories i came across in my daily morning online reading today:

In New Jersey slogan search, everyone's a comedian -- old news for me, but probably new for most of you... NJ needs a slogan, and people are... well... people.

Angry? Take it indoors! -- a university in china has built an "anger room" with lots of sandbags for punching... it's a cute article until the commentary at the end which is a bit sobering.

Communist sentenced for wearing red star -- a Budapest story for once!... i think it the american writer tried to make it sound more ironic than it really is in context, but still...

here is the one that got me going through the "oddly enough news":

Mom Makes Teen Stand on Street With Sign -- exactly what it says. there's a debate over whether this was a good thing or not, and the picture with it is yahoo's "most emailed picture of the day". I think it actually says something that the mother stood by her daughter during this punishment. I think we also live in a society that so much focuses on "do what works for you", or "do what makes you feel good", and doesn't so much support people correcting other people, even though I think that's a large part of a parent's function until you're an adult -- not to control you, but definitely to both punish and to encourage you. ( hopefully more of the latter than the former, but i think the former is necessary at times as well ). agree? disagree? what do you think?

and finally, here's the story that totally makes my day... it comes from japan:

Radish in intensive care after murder attempt -- exactly what it says, and a must read... my favorite line is: Asked why the radish -- more often found on Japanese dinner tables as a garnish, pickle or in "oden" stew -- had so many fans, town spokesman Jiro Matsuo said: "People discouraged by tough times were cheered by its tenacity and strong will to live."

happy friday!

Thursday, November 17, 2005

ode to state schools

in case you don't know the story well, this is my first semester teaching... ever.

i am a graduate student. for my first two years of grad school, i was on fellowship, meaning i got paid to do an insane amount of homework and studying and that was it. now, to earn my keep, i have about 100 calculus students of my very own. they go to lecture twice a week with a professor and then they have me once a week for recitation where we go over homework and i give them a quiz.

the catch for me is, i never had recitations when i was in college. i went to valpo, which is a small private university. my biggest gen ed class had maybe 30-40 people in it tops. everything was direct interaction with the professor.

the idea of having a lecture where you don't see the prof in a group smaller than 100 bothered me before i even started the semester. but once i got all 105 original names down (a handful have dropped since then but not many), i was feeling moderately better. the prof i work with is fantastic and he works hard, but even if he doesn't see them in smaller group contexts, i've had fairly fantastic success with students showing up to my office hours and emailing me or staying after class for extra help.

i thought maybe this all works out, and if you work hard at it, you can create a "small university environment" in your one class at least... even if students are in this massive sea of a college in general, you can make yourself be a teacher who cares and who they know cares and knows their work well.

a fair number of my students who actually come in to office hours regularly for help have thanked me profusely for helping them understand better. they've seen the insane hours of my own time i've put up for their use... and don't get me wrong, i hear them.

but, when i just spent my whole day in front of a chalkboard answering questions all morning and afternoon, and then spent a few hours typing answers to calculus question emails for my personal evening entertainment, the last thing i expected to see was an email from a student that said

"lara, everyone i know in calc is majorly stressed about the test. the assignments and exams in this class are not things you and the prof prepare us for. it's too late to save our semester, but you can hopefully take note and improve what goes on in lecture halls in the future."

oh my goodness... i understand frustration with workload... i've been through 4 years of college and 2.5 now of grad school. i understand lots to do and challenging classes. but when a student who hasn't emailed for help or stopped in for office hours once all semester tells me i'm helping set the class up for failure or something along those lines... it's amazing how much more loudly you hear that voice over all the dozens telling me "thanks so much for explaining that!"

part of my problem is i'm a people pleaser... i want everyone to be happy, so i stretch myself insanely thin just to try to make things work out for everyone i can. when i have 100 people i'm trying to please who are undergraduates, not even thinking about the stresses of who i have to please to maintain satisfactory progress as a graduate student, it's fairly obvious that it's impossible to please everyone, and yet i'd someone like to make it all work. so knowing this one student is unhappy makes me sad like i'm not doing my job, even though i know i'm going beyond what most TAs do here, and there's not much more i *can* do.

in my response to my student i told her that i understand challenging workload, and i'm sorry she feels stressed, BUT, i've been around to help all semester. i can't make class longer to cover more, i can't make people come in for help.. i can just be available, and i have been all semester long. really... what else can i do?

i started this post thinking i could eventually draw the conclusion: so maybe for all my work, having 100 student classes instead of 1/3 or 1/4 that size makes it impossible to reach all the students. now that it's crunch time, since it's impossible to give them individual attention during class, the ones who haven't tried to get extra help are going to blame me or just sink further into their bad grades

but maybe that's not even so. i generally had really good relationships with my professors, but i'm guessing, only seeing things from the "decent grade student" point of view, i was oblivious to this going on. it probably happens at small schools too. nonetheless, seeing the big school thing from this perspective, a large school is the PERFECT place to be for grad school, but i wouldn't have traded the personal attention and the relationships i formed with faculty at a smaller school for undergrad for the world.

it just frustrates me that a perfectly competant college student can neglect the available opportunities for help and then tell me that the professor and i are the ones letting them down.... especially after i spent at least 8-9 hours of my day today just answering calculus questions from anyone who asked me. it just doesn't compute.

in other news
* i get to grade calc exams all day tomorrow after combo lecture
* my brother called earlier... he drove all the way from georgia to memphis, and back to ashville, NC today, so he'll be here in the next 24 hours. :) so it'll be a fantastic weekend with him
* i'm glad clay got fired on apprentice tonight. randal and rebecca are still my favorites, followed by adam... we'll see how next week goes.
* vince is now officially a ph.d.... last year i was the youngest of dr. z.'s 4 students (mohammed, vince, aek, me). tonight, when i showed up at vince's dinner, dr. z. greeted me with "so i suppose you're next!".. even though aek is older than me, he's behind on quals and hasn't started research yet so dr. z. figures i'll finish before him. eric joined up with dr. z. after me and doesn't have a thesis topic yet like i do, so dr. z. sees him as behind me as well. it's just interesting that in a year i've gone from youngest in the academic family to oldest,... even though i see 3 of the graduated students regularly, amongst the "still a grad student" ones, i now have seniority in some sense... which is weird.

ok, really, done babbling.

time to crash. hopefully no headache or distressing emails tomorrow. we'll see how this goes.

yay for cookies? :)

i returned to my office after vince's defense, and colleen commented "chuck was in here a bit ago and said he owed you cookies on account of some test, they're on your desk."

chuck is the department grad director. i had no idea why he brought me cookies while i wasn't there. but hey, who's going to complain about free girl scout cookies? as i passed the box around the room to share, i kept puzzling out loud why in the world he specifically brought cookies by the office just for me.

10 minutes later, as i was leaving the office, it dawned on me. chuck stopped by the office while i had half a dozen students with me earlier, and he looked like he had questions, but stopped when he saw i was busy, and in response to his "hello, what's going on in here?", i commented "calculus 135 exam tomorrow... math party in here all day today!"
he replied "oh party! do you have cookies?"
me: "nope"
chuck "do you like cookies?"
me: "who *doesn't* like cookies?... unfortunately we don't have snacks at this party"
and just as quickly chuck disappeared and my students were mildly amused.

so 7 hours later, chuck stopped by to give me girl scout cookies just to be nice, and not finding me, he left them on my desk. exceedingly random... i stopped by his office on my way out around 6 to tell him thanks and we chatted for a bit. i'm finally to the point here where i'm on nice friendly terms with several professors here, like i used to be with a handful of the math dept. at valpo, and like i missed my first year here.

it's definitely nice to belong.

it's even nicer when someone sees you stressed out and does something nice and unexpected to make your day easier. :)

off to dinner to celebrate vince's defense... now i'm dr. z.'s 2nd oldest student (as opposed to being the 4th out of 5 last year). how weird is that?

later dudes.

my day so far

6am: woke up with a horrible mini-migraine and couldn't get back to sleep or do anything but lie there with a pillow over my head and let my eyes water from pain... took an ibuprofen and just stayed in bed til my alarm actually went off at 8:30

(that's already not a good start to any day)

8:30-9:45: slowly but surely got breakfast, got ready, and although my head still had a dull ache, the drugs managed to kill of most of the pain.

10:05am: showed up at my office on campus -- my students have an exam tomorrow and i promised to be around for office hours from 10am til 3pm. i had 2 students already waiting in the hall for me. starting then and going til 3:20 i did calc 1 problems non stop. around 3:20 everyone cleared out... i had minimum 2, maximum about 8 students with me at a time, with people in and out throughout the day... my office has 6 chairs, so grad students would stop by, see the crowd, laugh, and move on... what can i say? my students love me :P

3:20-3:30: finally lunch!

3:30-now: hiding in one of the graduate computer labs... i talked to sam for a bit... now i'm playing a few games of mahjong, and then i need to start my own homework at least a little before vince's defense at 5.

...and you thought you were having fun. :P

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

round 1 down, 2 more to go

today: long day of teaching, gave a seminar to a room full of professors and grad students (which is a whole different game than a packed room of undergrads... the undergrads ask questions you're prepared for b/c it's math you learned years ago... when you're talking to a graduate/professor type lot, they ask tricky questions because they've seen different things than you and know parts of what you're talking about better than you and catch weird details that don't bother you yet), and graded 100 calculus quizes.

while the grading fiesta was going on, i watched CBS's Johnny Cash tribute show... i greatly enjoyed it.

when brother called earlier, he was much more chipper. he's in georgia tonight. tomorrow he drives all the way across TN to go home and pick up some birds that my dad is selling to someone in NC, drop off dirty clothes from being gone working in florida the past week or two, pick up clean, and then head straight back east across the state again, hoping to get as far back as knoxville. being as we live in the SW corner of the state and TN is a long state east to west, that's a freakin long day.... just GA to SW TN is long... coming most of the way back too is crazy... friday he'll drive to NC to give the birds to the person who's buying them from dad, and then head up the coast and either push it to get here, or crash somewhere and get here on saturday.

on account of not knowing when he's getting in, we don't have firm plans for the weekend, other than at some point we'll see the new johnny cash movie, which i'm definitely looking forward to... i commented that i want to do fun stuff while he's here but we have to be good because i don't have much $$. brother's reponse? "i've been working overtime so much i got plenty of dollars, don't think about price, i can cover whatever we want to do" it's fun to have a brother. :P

tomorrow is hang out in my office and answer math questions non stop all day day, and friday is grading 50 exams day (which takes much longer than 100 quizes)... we'll see how long my energy lasts.

later dudes.

:P

i get to say "ultrametric" in a real math talk in an hour and a half.

heh.

if animals could talk...

... oh the stories they'd tell:

Harriet the tortoise turns 175

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

just in case you thought *you* had a busy week...

here's my next 3 days.

wednesday: teach from 8:55am until 1:15pm, probably talking with students until closer to 2. after standing and talking for that many hours straight, i get a break to find lunch and switch gears and work on my own stuff for an hour or two. from 5-6pm, i give the tropical math seminar. on account of all the stuff later in the schedule, tomorrow night i get to grade 100 calculus quizzes because i won't have time to later.

thursday: i am holding office hours from 10am to 3pm for my students, giving me 2 hours down time to do my own work/stretch. from 5-6pm is usually experimental math seminar, but vince, an older student working with my advisor who got a job in scotland this year is having his thesis defense for the seminar thursday. (he's back in town this week just to defend the thesis). my research is basically extending what vince's thesis is on, so it's imperative i come. after that, celebratory dinner for vince.

friday: my students have their exam friday morning during the same period that i have combinatorics. after the exam and my class, i will pick up half of the exams from the professor and i have until tuesday to grade them. get this... i will have just graded 100 quizes on wednesday night, and then i need to grade 50 exams two days later. i technically have until tuesday, BUT my brother gets into town to visit either friday night or saturday AM, so if i want to actually hang out with him, i'll get the tests graded on friday. so friday, post class, i will be camped out in my living room for 8 hours or so grading exams.

on a happier note, after that, my brother will be here... although he's been grumpy lately when i manage to catch him on the phone, so we'll see how that goes. then i still have to teach and go to my own classes while he's here too.

but, starting tomorrow, welcome to 3 days of grading mania. *not* excited about it.

on a happier note, i just ran through my tropical seminar talk for tomorrow with eric as my audience. he had agreed to critique my first 15 minutes, but was interested enough after that that he stayed to hear me go through the whole thing and commented it was a really cool talk. not that i'm to thank for the material -- the prof in charge of the seminar gave me the paper to learn -- but i did manage to convey it fine, which is good. now hopefully the people who have been in the seminar all semester (which does not include eric) will think it's good tomorrow too. :P

done babbling.... summary: if you have a busy week, be glad you don't have to grade 100 quizzes and 50 exams in the next 3 days on top of your other stuff. ;)

later dudes.

sometimes i'm just too darn nice

my day:
* up at 7:15, breakfast and new from 7:30-8, shower/get ready by 8-8:30, out the door by 8:30
* met with a student from 9am til 10:15am
* class from 10:20-11:40am
* met with two more students from noon until 1pm

this would be fine except... the 9am student made an appointment with me last week...the two students who showed up at noon did not.

after class, i went to the copy machine room to run off 100 quizes to give tomorrow, found someone else using the machine, went back to my office for 10 minues, then as i was about to head back down to the copy room and try again and then go home, i ran into my students in the doorway of my office.

me: "hi.. what's up?"
student: "we just have some questions over the practice tests we've been working on... where are you going?"
me: "i don't have office hours right now, i was on my way out"
student: "but you were here at this time last week"
me: "yes, but you emailed me and made an appointment last week"
student: "oh yeah, i forgot to do that... but aren't these some of your extra test week office hours?"
me: "no, i had office hours last night, and i have office hours all day on thursday... today i'm doing my own work"
student: "oh sorry... can we still ask questions?"
me: "since we're all here, sure... in the future, if it's not my office hours though, you really should make an appointment."

oi.

if they had emailed first and i had planned to be on campus an extra hour, i'd have no problem. my students can ask for all kinds of extra help and i'll help them out with a smile and explain and reexplain things until they get it... if they want to ask questions i figure i should be around to help them understand better.

BUT, for as much energy as i put into being a good TA, if i feel they're not being respectful of my time, i get really irritated really quickly. this is time #2 when that's happened. time #1 was when a student made an early morning appointment and then never showed.

in the end i forgive them, but really, if i'm giving half my week this week to being useful for them when i have my own homework to do AND i'm giving a graduate seminar lecture tomorrow, the least they can do is show up when i planned to be around or make an appointment, rather than make any time i happen to be on campus time to show up and pick my brain for help. i'm really nicer to them than i should be for being around to help.

so oi.

now to get to my own work.

later dudes.

Monday, November 14, 2005

i love being a research scientist

otherwise, how would i know where to find papers like this:

Local Pancake Defeats Axis of Evil

Sunday, November 13, 2005

:)

my advisor is going to be happy with me tomorrow. :)

the end.

two happy things :)

1 is old, 1 is new

(1) this sunday, our new pastor and his wife were visiting. they've been up in the area looking at new houses to buy, and then come move here to jersey to start working at our church in the spring. they'd visited once before, but it was while i was in europe so i'd never met them before. on the way out of church, they stood with the greeters and shook hands.

this may sound trivial, but here's something that absolutely made my day. when i said hello to them, they actually asked me my name.

one of the reasons i felt immediately at home at my NJ church was that by the 2nd week i was there, the pastor knew me by name and always had something to say particularly just to me, even if it was just a sentence. my pastor knew me and cared about me (as he knew and cared about every member of the congregation).

for nearly a year now, we've been in a vacancy period, with a temporary pastor. i'm glad we have a pastor around, but the greeting i get every sunday from him for the past year is "good morning to you all" (it makes me laugh because he says just "good morning" to everyone and i get to him about the point in line where he thinks he needs something different for a person or two and i always get to "to you all". he's admitted from week 1 that he's older and never going to get names straight so he's not going to try beyond the board and church leaders. knowing it's temporary i can deal with it, but being known by name by the pastor is something i've missed for quite some time.

so (a) it was supremely cool to finally meet this pastor we've heard about on paper (and that others have met before but i haven't). he seems like an incredibly friendly guy, and his wife was very approachable and nice as well. and they asked me my name. :)

(2) this one i yack about every few months. last month i put up this post with a timeline of how i've been doing with my weightloss goals and with new clothes i got. a month ago in that post i had commented i had lost 55 pounds. since then i've managed to lose 9 more. (i've heard you can safely lose 2 pounds a week healthily and keep it off, so i'm at about the max you can do at that rate), so here's me just now again... 64 pounds down, 36 to go



this might be getting boring to some of you, but it's at least a little bit fun to me to see how much i've changed in the past year :P

by the way, see the stack of books and stuff in front of my CD tower? that's my to do list today... so apparently i better get doing. :P

happy sunday?

a best friend...

...is someone who, when she calls you up after not hearing from you in awhile, and gets...

"hi! so how are you?"
(me:) "eh"
"just eh?"
(me:) "definitely just eh... doesn't need to be elaborated on"

accepts that, realizing from your tone of voice that she doesn't need to panic about you and she doesn't need to give you a hard time about it either.

it would be nice if parents could figure that one out too.

Friday, November 11, 2005

nix that

yesterday i was totally bummed when my brother called to tell me work changed up his schedule and he needed to stay in florida.

5 minutes ago he called me again to say work changed their minds again and his trip here is back on! none of this is his doing -- all of it is his bosses changing their minds.... i would be super annoyed if my schedule was changed that drastically that quickly.

he commented if they change again he's gonna go on the trip anyhow and take the week off as planned because they can't change their minds too many more times too close to the line like that.

so one week from tomorrow, BROTHER will be here! major yay for that! :)

the end.

chicken little :)

another movie off the must see list... tonight, leigh, sarah (not the one i usually talk about... new first year student sarah), and i saw a matinee of "chicken little".

props for
*having zack braff be the voice of the main character!
*using actual songs in movie instead of occasional gimpy ones written just for the film. favorite one that showed up and was used well was art garfunkel's "all i know"
*having a furby/troll halfbreed looking character with bright orange hair. :)

while not "oh my goodness it's the best cartoon movie i've ever seen!" it was cute and worth the $6 i paid to see it.

yay for happy endings. :)

the end.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Jesus loves me...

finally, i've finished Jesus Loves Me: Celebrating the Profound Truths of a Simple Hymn

i got this book way earlier this summer when barnes and noble was having a major online booksale. i think i got it for like $4 or something like that. i liked the title, i liked the price, so i figured it could be reading for the plane to prague in july or something.

come with me to europe it did, and i actually started it there.

like the title suggests, throughout the book, the author elaborates on the different phrases in the children's song "Jesus loves me, this i know!". each chapter is about a different phrase in the song.

each chapter begins with a passage or quote from a book related to the topic. then, (my favorite part of the book), each chapter has a couple page "chat" with Jesus with the author asking common questions i think everyone on earth asks at some point or another, and with Christ's responses being directly from or based on Bible passages (references included).

after these two parts, the author goes on to elaborate on the theme phrase of the chapter.

since each chapter is more or less self contained, that's how i managed to stretch the thing out over the course of 4 months even though it's not that long of a book.

the chapter that got to me most, was the one entitled, "this i know: erasing doubt". while the author makes good points throughout, this is the chapter i happened to get to on the night in prague that i found out that my grandma had died back in the states. ironically enough, the "chat with Jesus" begins with

how can i be sure you know me?
are you not one of my sheep? am i not your shepherd? my sheep hear my voice, and i know them and the follow me. i give unto them eternal life and they will enver perish. my Father has made you a present unto me and no one can take you out of my Father's hand.

ironic because that response is based on John 10:27-30 and John 10:27-28 is both my confirmation verse and was my grandma's confirmation verse too. timing wise, it was PERFECT.

my favorite part of this book is probably the "chats". even though they only constitute a small fraction i think they were well-written and relevant.

as with the last book or two i've rambled about on here, you can kind of tell from the title whether it's your cup of tea or not. if it looks like a cool idea, you'll probably enjoy it. if the title doesn't excite you, then it's probably not for you.

far from the most profound book i've ever read, still it was a quiet and simple reminder of an eternal truth that i often get too busy to focus on: Jesus loves me. and to be reminded of that is never a bad thing. :)

the end.

apprentice, week ???

TWO firings again? it's like the donald can't wait for this season to be over!

this week was star wars -- task: invent an interactive display to promote the episode 3 dvd and the new video game... i had read somewhere online that george lucas might appear this season, but not the man himself, just one of his producers.

brian screwed up majorly by making his team miss their meeting with the executives; thus his team totally missed the point of the task... so from the beginning i was expecting him to get fired.... marshawn was being really screwy with the presentation. i was fairly disappointed in her. she's been strong, consistent, and not catty throughout, but when she decided not to do the presentation and pass it off half an hour before it was to be made, that did not bode well for her at all.

so farewell to BOTH brian and marshawn.

this leaves 6 contestants.

i think clay is whiny, i think felisha is fake. i think alla brings a lot to the table but i associate her a lot with felisha so she gets on my nerves. i'm frankly surprised that all three of them are in the final 6.

i like adam, even though he seems a little green around the gills. he seems to be a responsible team player and could make it out alright.

rebecca's made some decisions i didn't like this season, but in the end, every episode she works hard, and she picks up slack even at the last minute without getting petty with others. ... and she's still doing this whole season on crutches. now that marshawn is gone, she's my #2 pick.

but randal is still totally the man. i'm still pulling for him all the way.

we shall see...

what is this about next week's task being to write a song? oi... sometimes i wonder why i still watch tv anymore... without scrubs on, there isn't really anything i should watch, and yet i'm sadly addicted to a handful of stuff.

in other news, it's after 10:30 on a night my students have webwork due and i have no "last minute question" emails yet -- this is kinda nice!

to read, and probably to write a book review in a bit... stay tuned.

eh

so my brother isn't coming to visit anymore.

i had been way excited about him coming for a couple weeks,... he had asked time off to actually come this next monday.

then hurricane wilma hit florida and work asked all the memphis crews (he installs satellite dishes with dish network) to go down to florida and help with repairs, so he decided he'd come the 19th-24th and hang with me for a weekend and then go with me to pittsburgh for thanksgiving at my aunt's house.

today he calls me and says all the other teams from other areas were going back home but there was still a lot of work and so memphis was still staying put to help in florida and he can't really come anymore.

i know that it's important to help out people who are lacking in the infrastructure that they had up before and he's doing a good thing and he needs the money... but his comment to me when he called to tell me he can't come was "at least i'll have enough $$ to buy you a nice ipod with lots of memory for christmas"... i don't want stuff though (not that it's not fun to have)... i want to hang out with my brother. people are much more important than the stuff.

so i'm a bit bummed. no brother til i go home for christmas which a little bit sucks.

oi.

dinner with today's experimental math speaker, and then here for apprentice and math work... aren't you jealous?

later dudes.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

"welcome to the calc recitation after-party"

yes... i am guilty of saying those exact words earlier this afternoon... oi.

so i teach from 8:55-9:50, 10:35-11:30, and 12:15-1:10 every wednesday. i generally have people stay after and ask questions after each section, so that's not a problem. moreover, i have to get to my 2nd and 3rd sections on time, so there's an upper bound on how long i stay in the room during my 1st two sections.

section 3 though, is another story. every week, people finish their quiz, and turn in their homework, then minimum two, max a dozen, students from that class like to stay after and ask me about the harder homework questions that i don't have time to get to during class.

since i don't have a "next section" to get to, i'm generally pretty flexible about staying as long as they need me.

however, "as long as they need me" periodically turns into "until we get kicked out". given the next class has about 5-6 student and a teacher, and i have 35 students to get out of the room, so they're fairly patient. but often, the other teacher (who is an actual professor, not just a TA) sticks her head in and politely hints for me to give her her room.

today that happened while i still had 6 students attached to me with 2 problems they all wanted solutions to.

so, since all rooms on the hallway were taken, we camped out in a large circle on the floor next to the vending machines at the end of the hall. for another 45 minutes, i coached them through problems as a group, with me just writing on scratch paper in the middle of the circle. it was actually kinda fun.

(and the sad thing is -- if you know me, you can probably actually picture me sprawled out on the floor of a hallway, excitedly explaining how to sketch a function to an audience of half a dozen students... oi :P)

but really -- how often do you have a math class "after party" with like 20% of the class still hanging out with the teacher wanting to know more. i love my students, but it takes a lot of energy to get through 4-5 hours of talking math straight to 100ish students... or in the case of today, more like 6 hours straight.

i'm glad they want to learn and ask questions as we go rather than snowballing and freaking out the day before the test... but man... calc after party... go figure.

3pm... *finally* time for lunch.

later dudes.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

ode to the dentist?

last week i griped that my new NJ dentist isn't the most personable -- but i must say one thing for him -- he did the most efficient filling job ever this afternoon.

seriously, i was in the door and back out in less than 15 minutes and didn't feel a thing. that 15 minutes includes 2 of sitting in the waiting room reading half a national geographic article about the mars rovers, getting a shot of the stuff that makes your mouth all numb and waiting for it to set in, all the drilling, and all the stuffing the tooth with metal... and still back out on the street in under 15 minutes... the only hard part was to not think about the drilling sounds. really it didn't hurt at all, just the noise gets to me.

by the way, thanks to the state of NJ for providing the metal in my mouth. the $$ i have deducted from my paycheck each month this year to be a part of a DMO (dental equivalent of an HMO) totals up to about one cleaning treatment, which i already used. so the getting the filling, which is what, another $50 at least or something?, is totally bonus thanks to technically being an employee of the state with state health insurance. i don't mind taking care of my teeth if the state will pay for me. :)

another tooth full of metal... at least i should be good to go for at least another 6 months tooth-wise.

night y'all. :P

Monday, November 07, 2005

:-P

excerpt from an email i got today:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And the observation is: THANK GOD Lara still knows how to say "all y'all" and to use the
expression as CORRECT SOUTHERN GRAMMAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bless yore pea-pickin heart!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ha :P

heroes of the weekend

by the way, major props to:

(1) leigh -- on friday night, when i was all grumpy, after she finished the movie she had rented, she appeared at the door of my room and just said "so i'm going to read now -- what book am i reading?", and we picked out 2 of my dr. seuss books for her to read to me just to make me laugh before she went on to her own stuff to read. i was amused. leigh is a good friend.

(2) the current radio DJ... i spend a lot of time listening to the local christian radio station... when i first moved here, all my radios were set to 99.7 (my favorite memphis station), so the first thing they picked up in my new place in jersey was 99.1. unlike some christian stations, i don't get tired of these guys regularly,.. i like a lot of their usual spots, and i usually enjoy the DJs rather than them getting on my nerves. the 10am-2pm gal has a regular spot called "beth's book club" where she gives away some newly published books that have come across her desk to the first caller who guesses something or another right. one of the books today had a really cool title, so i looked it up in amazon, and ended up buying it just based on the recommendations there -- mostly because it looked like it addressed exactly things that have been bugging me a lot lately and it would be good food for thought. i'll mention it by title if it really is as good as it appears to be. :)

i think that's all the shoutouts for now. if sarah can help me figure out stuff for tropical seminar, she will soon top the list later this afternoon... we shall see. ;)

later dudes

i love scrubs

that's a good summary for the past couple days.

scrubs, in case you didn't know, is my current pick for "lara's favorite TV show of all time".

when season one came out on DVD earlier this year, i had it preordered so it came to my house asap. (it should be noted that this is the first time EVER that i've liked a tv show enough to want to own it all on DVD)

when season two comes out a week from tomorrow, yup, i've got that preordered from amazon too, so i can see it as soon as it comes out.

so what do you do when you have to sit down and grade 105 calculus quizzes? watch your scrubs dvd and get to work, of course!

what do you do when you need to sit down and grade all those students' homework assignments too? turn on the scrubs dvd where you left off, and get back to work again. :)

what do you do when you actually need to study and work through the students' homework assignment for this wednesday so that you can actually answer their questions during office hours this afternoon? watch a few more episodes of scrubs and get back to work. :)

in the past less than 24 hours, i've seen 14 of the 24 season one episodes. if i keep up this trend next weekend with this week's grading, i'll have made it through season one yet again, and in order, in time to watch it pretty much back to back with the new DVD when it comes out. *that* is exciting.

otherwise, all i've done this weekend is math.
* as indicated above, most of yesterday was consumed by grading and working out this week's calc homework that my students have to do.
* i did absolutely nothing for my advisor this week, but we didn't meet last week so this afternoon i can just show him what i would have showed him then.
* i give the tropical math seminar next week. while i understand the paper i'm presenting from a graph theory point of view, the prof in charge wants me to start out with a linear algebra example to tie my talk together with the rest of the seminars this semester. after fighting most of saturday with it, i still don't get it, so i'm meeting with sarah (grad student a year ahead of me, who just so happens to be a student of the prof making me do this) this afternoon to hopefully make my day of struggling and getting nowhere on saturday come into better perspective... we'll see.

conclusion: lots and lots of work, but scrubs gets me through it, and that makes me happy. the end. :P

Friday, November 04, 2005

it's official...

...i have absolutely no social life.

it's friday night -- where is lara? at her computer answering math question emails from her students (then again if they're working on calculus homework on friday night, apparently they don't have social lives either :P)

mostly this is my own doing. i avoid large groups of people for the most part so that limits me to one on one hanging out which i like just fine, but...

* ben is all about travelling to visit a certain friend of mine in delaware every weekend now

* scott is a born party-er and does his own thing on weekends

* colleen actually has other friends through her stuff with the catholic center, and she goes to large group things, so she circulates with lots of people i don't know on weekends

* leigh is perfectly happy being a hermit and watching movies all night or reading at barnes and noble on her own, and is not all about going out and doing the same things as me more than once in awhile

* eric is mr. super-motivated and is always working on math every night of the week (including friday... unfortunately for me from about friday noon til i go to sleep, my brain automatically shuts off for half a day)

this exhausts the list of usual suspects.

i miss in college where i had many many friends, any one of which i could generally call up and go do something with, and there were lots more people interested in (i) hanging out one on one, and (ii) doing the same random things i like to do. i've been anti-large groups enough here, and people's interests and habits have diverged enough that friday nights i just feel like a lazy, anti-social bum anymore... go me?

mostly this is ok -- but if any of you ever want to show up and entertain me some weekend, you're more than welcome. ;)

later dudes.

apprentice, week something or another, and other such fun

what have i been waiting for since this season of apprentice began? yup -- markus *finally* got fired.

it's funny -- randall is my favorite person on the whole show, i respect marshawn a lot too... and i don't always agree with rebecca but i think she's strong too. adam i can go either way and everyone else gets on my nerves. and the 3 people i really like were 3/4 of the winning team this week. i can't really stand felisha or alla, and markus has always struck me as lazy, annoying, and never quite on task. it was humorous that what got him fired is that he can't answer a question straight and i thought that took a lot of balls for him to respond to "markus, you're fired... good luck" with "i'd accept that if i thought you meant it, but i don't believe you really mean good luck". his rambling essay in the cab at the end was sooo typical of what they've shown on screen all season -- he thinks that he's all profound and stuff, but really the man can't say a coherent sentence... he just jams words together that have no meaning as someone else said on last night's episode.

that says not much at all about the task so far -- which was to teach a learning annex workshop and whoever got the best reviews wins. randall proved that a safer topic done well is tons better than an eye-catching topic done poorly. just a catchy name doesn't win the prize. :) i was sad when rebecca and brian beat their heads into the wall and had no faith in randall's idea, but they stayed on task, and their team really did do fantastic. i still can't believe rebecca's pushing through this whole season on crutches -- that has to take a ton of work too. i have a hard enough time getting through a day in a math department with a limp, much less doing all the stuff they do on the show on actual crutches... oi.

random tangent: eric makes fun of me for watching apprentice every week, but he will actually probably watch with me next week since it's a star wars related task and i think george lucas is supposed to be in part of the episode too from what i've seen online -- that'll be entertaining. :P

moving on,...
in other news, my knee is better today than yesterday but still a bit annoying.

my car is in the shop today instead of tomorrow, so i'm eric's shadow for the day -- stuck on campus til he gets out of class at 1:20 then hanging with him until my car is ready -- since paying for today's stuff in entirety would put my good credit card over the limit, i'm getting a good year credit card with a few months payments same as cash (i.e. no interest), plus my mom, feeling bad for the fact that my car has cost me more in a week than i make in a month, is donating $500 to the fix lara's car fund (we still have a joint checking account we both have quick access to, which comes in handy at times like this!)

so today is alright -- i'll be happier when i'm done spending mega bucks and when i have a completely functional knee again though.

but major yay that markus is finally gone!

the end

Thursday, November 03, 2005

when it rains, it pours?

so after the knee incident last night, one would hope things get happier, but here's my day so far:

* i woke up every time i moved in my sleep last night wincing in pain from my right knee... it's not happy with me. it doesn't even hurt where the bump is below the knee cap -- it hurts along the outside of my knee whenever i bend it... this sucks.

* dentist appointment just now -- it was my first dentist visit in a year and a half... my first time to visit a dentist in NJ instead of the family dentist in TN... the first time i'd gone to the dentist on my own insurance. this new dentist will be fine but he wasn't very personable. the only two dentists i've had in my life (both in TN) were both very friendly and personable and would talk to me while they worked and be friendly. the hygenist was efficient and talked a little, but not much more than what she needed to ask and tell me about my teeth while she was working on them. my whole interaction with the dentist himself was, he came in and said nothing, so i said "hello", and then he nodded... looked through my mouth and said "#3 occlusal" or something like that, paused, and said to me "you have one cavity" and left. not mean, just less than chatty. so tuesday i'm going back for a filling. hopefully he'll say more than 4 words to me then. i guess i've been lucky to have really friendly calming dentists in the past... this'll work, and it needs to since this is where i live and have health insurance now, but blah... i'll miss dr. hart (in TN).

* got an estimate from goodyear... they did nearly $850 of work last weekend, while advising me i needed engine work too and they'd give me an estimate later in the week... looks like this weekend i'll be spending another $750... at least my car will be as good as new before thanksgiving though?

so yeah... between the dentist (not one of my favorite things to do even when it was dr. hart), the shooting pain in my knee (which is improving but is still a pain, no pun intended), and the fact that my car is going to nearly max out my capital one card on saturday, yeah... i've had better days.

lunch, office hours, seminar, dinner with my advisor and crew...

later dudes.

the damages

oi

so i got home from my shortened walk around 9
i just sat on my bed until about 9:45, and then decided that it might be a good idea to actually look at how bad i had hurt myself since it still kinda hurt and i hadn't tried to clean myself up at all yet

results?
* somehow i got a spliter into the palm of my left hand -- don't ask me how one gets a splinter from a sidewalk, because i really don't know. i've washed it good, i can't get it out, so i guess it'll just have to work its own way out

* somehow in falling, i cut a hole straight through my running pants at the right knee... that's through 2 layers of material, which i found moderately impressive

* quarter sized scab right below my left knee, which is right in the middle of a moderate sized bump (right below the knee)

*large bleeding patch the size of two quarters right below my right knee, which is right in the middle of an even larger bump, again right below the kneecap.

it took me an hour and a half to get my right knee to stop bleeding. not like it was bleeding profusely, but it was a big and deep enough scrape that it took a bit for it to start to scab over good... i sat with ice on it for an hour and a half too (until the ice was completely melted), but i still have a pretty huge knob on it. i'm ok to sit still or to move around on my feet, but the getting between sitting and standing hurts really bad. there's a fair amount of moderate cussing (which i usually try to avoid) that has come out of me tonight in angst.

the worst part was once i was home, but colleen and leigh were studying at a cafe and not going to be home for a bit, i had to clean it up, and it hurt so much to wash out the scrape on my right knee that my arm was actually shaking from the pain while i was doing it.

the joys of being self sufficient and miles and miles from family, right?

conclusion: i'm fine, but i'm going to be grumpy for a few days because i hurt.

the end.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

:(

my day:
after...
5 hours of teaching
3 hours of working with a student,
a seminar,
an hour meeting with the department grad director,
an hour and a half answering students' webwork emails and crazy emails from my advisor and various math dept. financial people,
(yes, that adds up to more or less 12 straight hours of running around minus a quick lunch and dinner),

i fully intended to chill out and go for a 5 mile jog... unfortunately a mile out, i hit a crack in the sidewalk while jogging and ended up sprawled out with a fairly well scraped up pair of knees... so after a 20 minute limping walk home while talking to scott on the phone for company, i'm giving up on a very long day and curling up with a cup of tea.

world, consider yourself ignored.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

prague, revisited :)

if you've been reading here for awhile, you know that i was in prague for 3 weeks with my summer job back in july/august.

i posted tons of my pictures here back then.

one of the students who was there with me finally got around to sending me a picture CD of his pictures from prague, and i got it today. he was the only one of us who paid to take pictures on the day we went to visit caves, and his planetarium pictures turned out much better than mine i thought... i was impressed.

of the 155 pics he sent me, here's my top 9 picks (click on a picture to see it larger in a new window):

yay for charles bridge?


people joke about "the short bus"... what about "the short train"? we actually rode one this size one day. :)


josef, me, missy, katja at the train station


on the day we went to the caves, all the scenery looked like this:


...or this:


...but if you looked over the cliff where you wait in line to take a tour, you see this: :)


josef, me, missy, sam in the cave


prague planetarium, take 1


prague planetarium, take 2


yay for happy pictures! (and yay that i get to go back for free again next year ;-) )

later dudes. :P

daily challenge

so every morning, i have a rule.

i don't care how much i'm in a hurry or how much i don't want to. my rule is: i'm not allowed to get out of bed and do anything until i've pulled the scale out from under my bed and stepped onto it. saturday's are the trickiest, b/c not only do i make myself get on the scale, but that's the day i've been writing down my weight every week for the past 10 months to keep track of progress.

all in all, i think it's a good habit. it's not obsessive. i'm not like excited at all to do it. but if i know i'm going to be keeping tabs of how i'm doing daily, it's much harder for me to "take a day off" and just be a complete slacker or put complete junk food in myself for a day. sure i had cake at my cousin's wedding last month. sure i go out with scott from time to time for drinks and crazy food... i figure no life change is worth making if i can't keep it up, and occasional ridiculous things are part of the deal. but it's much harder to slack in general when i know i'm keeping tabs on myself every single day.

doing this EVERY morning doesn't sound like it's that hard. it's less than 10 seconds of my day.

but i dare you. try it.

if you're at all not perfectly happy with your personal size and shape, some days it can be a lot more of a mental challenge than you would expect.

the end.