"the reader is invited to contemplate for himself the action of the weyl group, whose order can be shown to be (2^14)*(3^5)*(5^2)*7." ~my lie algebras textbook.
invited, but i don't really want to think... who can actually picture the action of a group with 696,729,600 elements anyhow? certainly not me, and certainly not the last day of classes before break.
duuude =P
Tuesday, November 25, 2003
"tell everybody i'm on my way...."
dude, what a day...
so sunday margie and i went to church and then to see "brother bear" and otherwise putzed around and ran a few errands... it was a good day, and "brother bear" was pretty quality. =)
favorite comical line?
kanai: ok, that's great, how about we just NOT talk, ok?
coda: ok! then i'll sing!
(intro into best song of the movie...) =)
favorite "moral of the story" line?
kanai is a human who hates bears but was turned into a bear, looking at a mural on a cave wall of a hunter with a spear and a bear, coda, an actual bear, comes up behind him
coda: those monsters are really scary
kanai: yeah...
coda: especially when they have those sticks
(it's all about seeing both sides of the story...)
dude, if only life had cartoon simplicity...
today, margie hung around campus all day while i had classes and then we had a good time for dinner at tgi fridays at the newark airport just before her flight... since then, i've been unmotivated to work on math, so i worked on printing out my christmas letter -- all 107 copies of it =P... only my printer was not being so agreeable... out of 120 sheets i tried to feed it, 13 came out messed up, but alas, it's done... =P... dave beagley suggested i threaten to turn it into a toaster, but apparently my printer doesn't succumb to threats... threatening to make it a microwave didn't work either...
mostly i think i was so easily irritated w/ the printer and so focused on that for the past several hours because i'm pretty irritated w/ my dad at present too... anyone who's talked to me in remotely recent history knows my famous mantra "oh i love my dad, we just get along better when there's a few states between us"... this is sooo true... i talked to him yesterday just fine and we had a nice chat... same the other times i've called home or vice versa this semester and while i'm away at school in general... tonight i called because i had asked him to have my brother call me last night and ryan never did call back... when i asked dad, "so could you have him call me *tonight*?" he got all annoyed with me as if i was asking the impossible and it was rude of me to ask that two nights in a row... whatever.. eventually ryan called to chat, but with dad periodically audible in the background "you're behind on your chores, why do you have to talk on the phone?"... i hadn't talked to ryan in the better part of two months, and it was super frustrating to end the chat with dad cussing at him in the background, him cussing back where i could hear him, and me pissed in general for having to deal with them... gotta love family...
random that i started w/ brother bear... i have no idea how to start looking at the flip side of the coin on this one though... if i had even a clue, maybe dad and me wouldn't spend so many hours yelling when we're actually in the same place at the same time... it's funny b/c people comment offhand sometimes when i relate dad stories that people fight because they're sooo similar... i hate that comment because for just about as long i can remember, i've been trying *not* to be like dad... i mean he has his qualities i respect, but he's also one of the most hypercritial people i know... pretty sure i've taken that and am super hyper critical towards myself but try (and think i succeed?) not being so much of others... when things don't go the way he wants them, he gets mad, starts yelling, and blames everyone else... when things don't go my way, i get mad, start beating up inanimate objects, and blame myself... dude, i've internalized my dad... that's great
on that note, i'm going to vote that i'm too tired to really be making sense right now and you can take the previous paragraph at whatever level of seriousity or joking you want....
in like 38 hours i'll be in pittsburgh =)
night
so sunday margie and i went to church and then to see "brother bear" and otherwise putzed around and ran a few errands... it was a good day, and "brother bear" was pretty quality. =)
favorite comical line?
kanai: ok, that's great, how about we just NOT talk, ok?
coda: ok! then i'll sing!
(intro into best song of the movie...) =)
favorite "moral of the story" line?
kanai is a human who hates bears but was turned into a bear, looking at a mural on a cave wall of a hunter with a spear and a bear, coda, an actual bear, comes up behind him
coda: those monsters are really scary
kanai: yeah...
coda: especially when they have those sticks
(it's all about seeing both sides of the story...)
dude, if only life had cartoon simplicity...
today, margie hung around campus all day while i had classes and then we had a good time for dinner at tgi fridays at the newark airport just before her flight... since then, i've been unmotivated to work on math, so i worked on printing out my christmas letter -- all 107 copies of it =P... only my printer was not being so agreeable... out of 120 sheets i tried to feed it, 13 came out messed up, but alas, it's done... =P... dave beagley suggested i threaten to turn it into a toaster, but apparently my printer doesn't succumb to threats... threatening to make it a microwave didn't work either...
mostly i think i was so easily irritated w/ the printer and so focused on that for the past several hours because i'm pretty irritated w/ my dad at present too... anyone who's talked to me in remotely recent history knows my famous mantra "oh i love my dad, we just get along better when there's a few states between us"... this is sooo true... i talked to him yesterday just fine and we had a nice chat... same the other times i've called home or vice versa this semester and while i'm away at school in general... tonight i called because i had asked him to have my brother call me last night and ryan never did call back... when i asked dad, "so could you have him call me *tonight*?" he got all annoyed with me as if i was asking the impossible and it was rude of me to ask that two nights in a row... whatever.. eventually ryan called to chat, but with dad periodically audible in the background "you're behind on your chores, why do you have to talk on the phone?"... i hadn't talked to ryan in the better part of two months, and it was super frustrating to end the chat with dad cussing at him in the background, him cussing back where i could hear him, and me pissed in general for having to deal with them... gotta love family...
random that i started w/ brother bear... i have no idea how to start looking at the flip side of the coin on this one though... if i had even a clue, maybe dad and me wouldn't spend so many hours yelling when we're actually in the same place at the same time... it's funny b/c people comment offhand sometimes when i relate dad stories that people fight because they're sooo similar... i hate that comment because for just about as long i can remember, i've been trying *not* to be like dad... i mean he has his qualities i respect, but he's also one of the most hypercritial people i know... pretty sure i've taken that and am super hyper critical towards myself but try (and think i succeed?) not being so much of others... when things don't go the way he wants them, he gets mad, starts yelling, and blames everyone else... when things don't go my way, i get mad, start beating up inanimate objects, and blame myself... dude, i've internalized my dad... that's great
on that note, i'm going to vote that i'm too tired to really be making sense right now and you can take the previous paragraph at whatever level of seriousity or joking you want....
in like 38 hours i'll be in pittsburgh =)
night
Monday, November 24, 2003
multitasker? eh, whatever dude =P
lkp 42 42 42 (11:55:45 PM): margie's supposed to kick me off the computer
lkp 42 42 42 (11:55:54 PM): it's nearly midnight nad i haven't done any homework for tomorrow yet
lkp 42 42 42 (11:55:57 PM): and that's probably bad
lkp 42 42 42 (11:56:07 PM): so you can talk to her =) she says i say "good bye"
alliswan42 (11:56:21 PM): hi Margie
alliswan42 (11:56:25 PM): thanks for watching after La
alliswan42 (11:56:29 PM): bye LA!
lkp 42 42 42 (11:58:24 PM): I finally got her off the computer. It took forever!!!!!!
alliswan42 (11:58:46 PM): LOL La just likes to...um, multitask, shall we say :-)
lkp 42 42 42 (11:59:01 PM): Multitask!?!?!?!
alliswan42 (11:59:11 PM): :-[
lkp 42 42 42 (11:59:32 PM): she's going to read to me
alliswan42 (11:59:41 PM): eww
alliswan42 (11:59:42 PM): Math?
lkp 42 42 42 (11:59:45 PM): doesn't Lei Algebra sound like a good bed time story
alliswan42 (12:00:00 AM): well, actually yet
alliswan42 (12:00:01 AM): yes
lkp 42 42 42 (12:00:05 AM): Yes, that is math
alliswan42 (12:00:06 AM): it would put me to sleep
lkp 42 42 42 (12:00:18 AM): I think it is putting La to sleep
alliswan42 (12:01:07 AM): talk to her about Pizzas with pineapple and chicken and something else she likes on it
lkp 42 42 42 (12:01:31 AM): But she needs to read this chapter for tomorrow
alliswan42 (12:01:57 AM): hmm
alliswan42 (12:02:08 AM): tell her if she's good she can have one of said pizzas
lkp 42 42 42 (12:02:14 AM): okay
lkp 42 42 42 (12:02:20 AM): we can have it for lunch tomorrow
alliswan42 (12:02:37 AM): :-D
lkp 42 42 42 (12:03:14 AM): she claims that she is being good
alliswan42 (12:03:45 AM): she always says that
alliswan42 (12:03:50 AM): you have to know when she's lying
lkp 42 42 42 (12:03:52 AM): well she is thinking hard
alliswan42 (12:04:03 AM): aren't we all
heh... oh, and btw, mystery caller from yesterday turned out to be prof. treanor... we chatted for half an hour tonight, fun times indeed =P...
sleep time!!!
lkp 42 42 42 (11:55:54 PM): it's nearly midnight nad i haven't done any homework for tomorrow yet
lkp 42 42 42 (11:55:57 PM): and that's probably bad
lkp 42 42 42 (11:56:07 PM): so you can talk to her =) she says i say "good bye"
alliswan42 (11:56:21 PM): hi Margie
alliswan42 (11:56:25 PM): thanks for watching after La
alliswan42 (11:56:29 PM): bye LA!
lkp 42 42 42 (11:58:24 PM): I finally got her off the computer. It took forever!!!!!!
alliswan42 (11:58:46 PM): LOL La just likes to...um, multitask, shall we say :-)
lkp 42 42 42 (11:59:01 PM): Multitask!?!?!?!
alliswan42 (11:59:11 PM): :-[
lkp 42 42 42 (11:59:32 PM): she's going to read to me
alliswan42 (11:59:41 PM): eww
alliswan42 (11:59:42 PM): Math?
lkp 42 42 42 (11:59:45 PM): doesn't Lei Algebra sound like a good bed time story
alliswan42 (12:00:00 AM): well, actually yet
alliswan42 (12:00:01 AM): yes
lkp 42 42 42 (12:00:05 AM): Yes, that is math
alliswan42 (12:00:06 AM): it would put me to sleep
lkp 42 42 42 (12:00:18 AM): I think it is putting La to sleep
alliswan42 (12:01:07 AM): talk to her about Pizzas with pineapple and chicken and something else she likes on it
lkp 42 42 42 (12:01:31 AM): But she needs to read this chapter for tomorrow
alliswan42 (12:01:57 AM): hmm
alliswan42 (12:02:08 AM): tell her if she's good she can have one of said pizzas
lkp 42 42 42 (12:02:14 AM): okay
lkp 42 42 42 (12:02:20 AM): we can have it for lunch tomorrow
alliswan42 (12:02:37 AM): :-D
lkp 42 42 42 (12:03:14 AM): she claims that she is being good
alliswan42 (12:03:45 AM): she always says that
alliswan42 (12:03:50 AM): you have to know when she's lying
lkp 42 42 42 (12:03:52 AM): well she is thinking hard
alliswan42 (12:04:03 AM): aren't we all
heh... oh, and btw, mystery caller from yesterday turned out to be prof. treanor... we chatted for half an hour tonight, fun times indeed =P...
sleep time!!!
Sunday, November 23, 2003
new york, new york =)... and other fun
dude, what a day!
so margie flew in late yesterday... we went to the rutgers wind ensemble concert w/ colleen, eric, ben, and sam, and had an excellent time... as always the music was awesome... the percussion section had the coolest instrument i've ever seen too... it was a crazy 5 foot stick full of bells, really crazily arranged that they banged on the floor periodically -- i want to make one of those =) after that we all attacked starbucks for some good old "happiness in a cup" =) and later headed home... i was up til like 3 though half out of excitement for margie being here and half out of caffeine energy... whatever =P
today, margie and i went to NYC... it was a blast: saw statue of liberty, wall street, world trade center site, southern end of central park, ate lunch at the hello deli (of david letterman show fame.... actually talked to rupert gee =P), rockefeller center (saw them working on the big christmas tree there), st. patrick's cathedral, fao schwarz, and times square before heading home again =P later tonight we had dinner w/ trevor, leigh, eric, ben, scott, and sam, and it was hilarious as always... margie's already commented "i love your math people... can i come back and visit again???" =) yay =) a fun day indeed. =)
she's also been going through all the books on my shelf and reminding me which are hilarious that i haven't looked at in forever... 777 mathematical conversation starters for one =P dude... it's just fun to have a "we can sing at the top of our lungs with garth brooks songs on the radio for an hour and have a blast", math joke, known each other for awhile now kind of friend around for a bit. =) yay for margie!!! =)
in other news, amanda (roommate here) apparently woke up to a random phone call for me... all she remembers are the words "valpo", "brother", and that they were in the area and wanted to see me... not a clue who... hopefully they'll catch me tomorrow... that would be durn spiffy whoever it is to have another buddy show up =) three cheers for spiffy people and happy days. the end =)
so margie flew in late yesterday... we went to the rutgers wind ensemble concert w/ colleen, eric, ben, and sam, and had an excellent time... as always the music was awesome... the percussion section had the coolest instrument i've ever seen too... it was a crazy 5 foot stick full of bells, really crazily arranged that they banged on the floor periodically -- i want to make one of those =) after that we all attacked starbucks for some good old "happiness in a cup" =) and later headed home... i was up til like 3 though half out of excitement for margie being here and half out of caffeine energy... whatever =P
today, margie and i went to NYC... it was a blast: saw statue of liberty, wall street, world trade center site, southern end of central park, ate lunch at the hello deli (of david letterman show fame.... actually talked to rupert gee =P), rockefeller center (saw them working on the big christmas tree there), st. patrick's cathedral, fao schwarz, and times square before heading home again =P later tonight we had dinner w/ trevor, leigh, eric, ben, scott, and sam, and it was hilarious as always... margie's already commented "i love your math people... can i come back and visit again???" =) yay =) a fun day indeed. =)
she's also been going through all the books on my shelf and reminding me which are hilarious that i haven't looked at in forever... 777 mathematical conversation starters for one =P dude... it's just fun to have a "we can sing at the top of our lungs with garth brooks songs on the radio for an hour and have a blast", math joke, known each other for awhile now kind of friend around for a bit. =) yay for margie!!! =)
in other news, amanda (roommate here) apparently woke up to a random phone call for me... all she remembers are the words "valpo", "brother", and that they were in the area and wanted to see me... not a clue who... hopefully they'll catch me tomorrow... that would be durn spiffy whoever it is to have another buddy show up =) three cheers for spiffy people and happy days. the end =)
Friday, November 21, 2003
brain drain
dude... so thursday night is no math night which means food and cards. we always play sheepshead and i usually end the night with a negative score, but i think i just set an all time record... -30 in one night! mostly because of bad cards most of the night and a few times on account of obscure rules i didn't have quite straight... bother...
on the other hand, to make up for the worst night of cards ever, it's like the clearest sky ever out there! after all the rain we've had lately -- i think the raritan river (maybe 150(?) feet out behind my apartment building) would literally swallow up my apartment if we got even just some more drizzle in the near future! -- it had to clear up eventually, but tonight is spectacular! i just spent 30 minutes out there with my crummy book of constellations trying to figure them out... besides orion, the pleiades, and cassiopeia, pretty sure i found gemini, auriga, cephus, and canis major -- major party and a half! there's also a huge star near orion (not sure if it's aldebran or sirius??) that flashes blue and orange... eric and me found it with his binoculars a couple of weeks ago and it was really bright tonight too... most excellent all around!
kinda in a weird mood... it's been a long week for many reasons... but margie comes tomorrow to visit! yay for friends =)
top 10 thoughts of the evening (in no significant order whatsoever)
1) dude the stars are cool!... had to be a night like this that God told Abraham his descendents would be as many as the stars in the sky... or even clearer if that's possible... durn spiffy
2) where did my smarts go? i mean, i know i'm not dumb or whatever, but there are times when i really wonder... yeah, whatever, not being a pessimist, not being a pessimist....
3) i miss nicole... still... a lot... that'll be true for like forever... there's not a day since she died 11 weeks ago now that something doesn't make me think of her... and several times a day... today it was a song on the radio on the way to school that was also on the CD she gave all of us roommates for graduation in may... or when i'm a bit bummed/stressed/whatever and want to (or do) complain, i always end up seeing her in the back of my head... with her "listening face", not much to say until i was done yaking, and then "well, la, i still think you're a wonderful person",... yeah, i miss nicole
4) margie's coming! margie's coming! dude, only like 15 hours from now -- how awesome is that?!?!?! yay! =)
5) there is no spoon
6) i miss hugs... valpo was a full of hugs, international church of budapest was full of hugs... math grad school, not so full of hugs... which is fine, that's how it works, and i wouldn't trade the people here for anything, but dude, today i could use a hug
7) "i have run, i have crawled, i have scaled these city walls, but i still haven't found what i'm looking for" ~u2... dude that song's been in my head for a couple days!
8) do i tire other people out even half as much as i tire me out? =P
9) there's a website i like about exploding grapes in your microwave here... i think it's one of the greatest things i've ever read but never tried it... wonder what would happen if i did... well, maybe amanda would want to have my head... that wouldn't be good... but exploding fruit in the microwave? c'mon, that's entertainment, right? (i know, pyro! pyro! pyro!.. whatever =P)
10) i have the best friends ever... i've been a bum this week, and you all are great =) yay for you =)
dude, ok, end of brain dump... time to watch some dumb tv i recorded while i was out tonight and get some sleep... gotta clean in the morning so that margie at least doesn't think i set out to make the place messy before she got here =) good night all =P
on the other hand, to make up for the worst night of cards ever, it's like the clearest sky ever out there! after all the rain we've had lately -- i think the raritan river (maybe 150(?) feet out behind my apartment building) would literally swallow up my apartment if we got even just some more drizzle in the near future! -- it had to clear up eventually, but tonight is spectacular! i just spent 30 minutes out there with my crummy book of constellations trying to figure them out... besides orion, the pleiades, and cassiopeia, pretty sure i found gemini, auriga, cephus, and canis major -- major party and a half! there's also a huge star near orion (not sure if it's aldebran or sirius??) that flashes blue and orange... eric and me found it with his binoculars a couple of weeks ago and it was really bright tonight too... most excellent all around!
kinda in a weird mood... it's been a long week for many reasons... but margie comes tomorrow to visit! yay for friends =)
top 10 thoughts of the evening (in no significant order whatsoever)
1) dude the stars are cool!... had to be a night like this that God told Abraham his descendents would be as many as the stars in the sky... or even clearer if that's possible... durn spiffy
2) where did my smarts go? i mean, i know i'm not dumb or whatever, but there are times when i really wonder... yeah, whatever, not being a pessimist, not being a pessimist....
3) i miss nicole... still... a lot... that'll be true for like forever... there's not a day since she died 11 weeks ago now that something doesn't make me think of her... and several times a day... today it was a song on the radio on the way to school that was also on the CD she gave all of us roommates for graduation in may... or when i'm a bit bummed/stressed/whatever and want to (or do) complain, i always end up seeing her in the back of my head... with her "listening face", not much to say until i was done yaking, and then "well, la, i still think you're a wonderful person",... yeah, i miss nicole
4) margie's coming! margie's coming! dude, only like 15 hours from now -- how awesome is that?!?!?! yay! =)
5) there is no spoon
6) i miss hugs... valpo was a full of hugs, international church of budapest was full of hugs... math grad school, not so full of hugs... which is fine, that's how it works, and i wouldn't trade the people here for anything, but dude, today i could use a hug
7) "i have run, i have crawled, i have scaled these city walls, but i still haven't found what i'm looking for" ~u2... dude that song's been in my head for a couple days!
8) do i tire other people out even half as much as i tire me out? =P
9) there's a website i like about exploding grapes in your microwave here... i think it's one of the greatest things i've ever read but never tried it... wonder what would happen if i did... well, maybe amanda would want to have my head... that wouldn't be good... but exploding fruit in the microwave? c'mon, that's entertainment, right? (i know, pyro! pyro! pyro!.. whatever =P)
10) i have the best friends ever... i've been a bum this week, and you all are great =) yay for you =)
dude, ok, end of brain dump... time to watch some dumb tv i recorded while i was out tonight and get some sleep... gotta clean in the morning so that margie at least doesn't think i set out to make the place messy before she got here =) good night all =P
Thursday, November 20, 2003
i am NOT an interactive learner (today)
dude, one class down, one to go today...
i absolutely hate it when dr. sahi does his new "lecturing should be shared" thing. he came in 3 classes ago and said "i forgot my notes, why don't you all take turns proving the theorems that i wanted to cover today." and handed over the chalk. luckily the guy who went right before me took so long we never got around to me. however, even though sahi's had his notes since, he's kept it up. i've been picked out once so far.
i understand his philosophy. he thinks by actively explaining the stuff to each other, we'll learn it better. but (1) i don't like being singled out (2) we get a lot less done from all the long pauses incurred this way (3) proofs get so convoluted in class when the person proving the theorem doesn't know the stuff beforehand and so my notes turn into a lot of scratching out and scribbles trying to figure it out as we go (4) personally, as long as i'm still in the "class" and not the "lecturer" i guess i'm ok with the system although it just alters the pace of the course completely... but when i'm at the board without being prepared for it, i'm not learning more, i'm flustered and concerned i'm convoluting things just like everyone else does when they're up there... conclusion: yes it's good to make learning more interactive and to explain things to each other instead of being passive listeners... but this is so on the spot that it's not helping, it's making me dread going to the class instead!
on the other hand, spiffy things are going on in that class contentwise... i don't get all the details quite as well as i'd like, but the big picture is pretty clear. it's a lie algebras class and so we've spent forever learning basic properties of lie algebras and special kinds of them... then we've gotten to the point of drawing these matrices and graphs to represent them instead... and pretty soon we'll be to the point of saying every single semisimple lie algebra that exists is represented by one of the diagrams/matrices in chapter 11 of our book, and every single one of those diagrams does actually correspond to some semisimple lie algebra -- a complete characterization. that's absolutely beautiful. *this* is why i study math... not for the headaches and frustration analysis gives me -- for the order behind it all and for the awesomeness of building big beautiful truths out of smaller ones. dude, if only i understood what was going on in *all* of my classes like that, then this semester would be just a bit less stressful =P
ok, so pretty sure i have homework to write up and that's definitely not what i'm doing at present. but rest assured... i'll be back =P
i absolutely hate it when dr. sahi does his new "lecturing should be shared" thing. he came in 3 classes ago and said "i forgot my notes, why don't you all take turns proving the theorems that i wanted to cover today." and handed over the chalk. luckily the guy who went right before me took so long we never got around to me. however, even though sahi's had his notes since, he's kept it up. i've been picked out once so far.
i understand his philosophy. he thinks by actively explaining the stuff to each other, we'll learn it better. but (1) i don't like being singled out (2) we get a lot less done from all the long pauses incurred this way (3) proofs get so convoluted in class when the person proving the theorem doesn't know the stuff beforehand and so my notes turn into a lot of scratching out and scribbles trying to figure it out as we go (4) personally, as long as i'm still in the "class" and not the "lecturer" i guess i'm ok with the system although it just alters the pace of the course completely... but when i'm at the board without being prepared for it, i'm not learning more, i'm flustered and concerned i'm convoluting things just like everyone else does when they're up there... conclusion: yes it's good to make learning more interactive and to explain things to each other instead of being passive listeners... but this is so on the spot that it's not helping, it's making me dread going to the class instead!
on the other hand, spiffy things are going on in that class contentwise... i don't get all the details quite as well as i'd like, but the big picture is pretty clear. it's a lie algebras class and so we've spent forever learning basic properties of lie algebras and special kinds of them... then we've gotten to the point of drawing these matrices and graphs to represent them instead... and pretty soon we'll be to the point of saying every single semisimple lie algebra that exists is represented by one of the diagrams/matrices in chapter 11 of our book, and every single one of those diagrams does actually correspond to some semisimple lie algebra -- a complete characterization. that's absolutely beautiful. *this* is why i study math... not for the headaches and frustration analysis gives me -- for the order behind it all and for the awesomeness of building big beautiful truths out of smaller ones. dude, if only i understood what was going on in *all* of my classes like that, then this semester would be just a bit less stressful =P
ok, so pretty sure i have homework to write up and that's definitely not what i'm doing at present. but rest assured... i'll be back =P
on doubt
quote of the AM "do not give heed to your doubts for a moment. turn from them with horror, as you would from blasphemy, for they ARE blasphemy. they are not YOUR doubts until you consent to them and adopt them as true." (hannah whitall smith)
...if only it were that simple...
...if only it were that simple...
ta da! =P
greetings one and greetings all... i finally broke down and did it... here's my first blog ever... a few random but spiffy friends inspired me and somehow convinced me that this was a good idea -- i still think it could be trouble =P... either way, it's here at last... stay tuned for more fun =P
