is it too much to ask?

some days i enjoy teaching... and sometimes it drives me nuts.

don't get me wrong. i enjoy students. i try to come in to every class with a good attitude, and be approachable and enthusiastic enough that they're willing to ask me questions when they don't get things.

last friday in recitation, we were discussing double integrals for the first time. i started class with "so do you all understand what double integrals compute?... not *how* to compute them, but *what* they're actually telling you?" one section said "no, can you tell us?"... another section said "yeah, of course, they compute volume. we get it, let's solve problems", but the third section responded as follows.
"so for starters, do you understand what integrals are telling you, or should we start with that?"
(universal nodding throughout the room, and some "yeah, we got it")
"ok, so can someone tell me what double integrals compute?"
(confused looks, students start avoiding eye contact)
"anyone? i don't bite... "
(i give them a few seconds to respond)
"ok, so either you were all lying about question one, or you're really shy about question two, which one should i assume?"
(in unison from several students in the back of the room) "we all lied!"
"ok, thanks, so we'll start with that... if you don't know it, you've gotta ask... that's what recitation is about guys!"

in some contexts my students don't ask a thing. not universally, but a lot of them seem to want to just compute away and get the right numbers without any intuition or motivation for what on earth they're doing, i find this alarming.

on the other hand, they have a computer lab due tomorrow. it's fairly straightfoward instructions. draw a graph, locate a specific point on the graph, draw a normal vector to the graph at that point. there's a help webpage that works out an example. that doesn't mean i don't expect they'll periodically get stuck and ask questions. some of my students work through it, pay attenion, and ask specific questions. i'm more than happy to help them out.

on the other hand, i get students who plug away and type lots of stuff and come ask for help, again, like in class, not trying to connect what they're doing on the computer with what they're doing in the classroom -- not looking for a reason, just trying to blindly mimic things they see and magically get the right answers. i also get students who read the instructions and decide it's impossible to understand so they instantly email me and ask for "how to do it" for the whole lab... with little evidence of spending any time on it... they just want the answers. i get really frustrated with the latter two groups. i really want to help them understand the material, not just see the lab as a chore. plus it's a lot easier for me to answer questions if i can help them keep the big picture in mind. i'm not a magic answer machine. i'm there to help them really understand what's going on.

summary: for the lecture material, many students seem to not want the big picture and so they don't ask as many questions as i wish they would. for the computer labs many students don't seem to connect the computer material to the lecture material and end up stuck and asking tons of broad questions more than they should instead of putting some thought into things before they ask away. either way my frustration is the same: i'd love to motivate students to be excited about the material, or, if not excited, at least trying to actually understand what they're doing.

i don't need them all to be aspiring math junkies who get excited about the same things as i do. that would be ridiculous. i just want my students to care about what they're doing and not be happy to turn in random computations they don't really understand. i want them to ask about what's "really" going on. is that too much to ask?

don't get me wrong, i survived 4 years of HS, 4 years of undergrad, and 3 years of taking lots of classes in grad school (now in my 4th year i'm not doing much besides teaching and my own research). so not presently, but from the previous 11 years, i understand lots and lots of work all too well. i'm guilty of spending less time on some classes in order to do better than others.

i get frustrated from the teaching end of the sorts of questions i get from students-- looking for a quick fix to get the right answers instead of true understanding... but then i think about it. like i just admitted, i'm guilty too of being overloaded and prioritizing my classes. sometimes it can't be helped. there are just too many demands on students in far too short spans of time. the immediate target is getting frustrated with students, but i think in general, i'm irritated with an education system that makes students take so many demanding courses simultanously that they can't really do a good job in any of them. kids get all the way to calculus 3 without knowing how to compute integrals or derivatives, without knowing how to find maximums and minimums, without basic trigonometry skills, without basic algebra skills, or worse yet without basic arithmetic skills. teachers have so much material to cover quickly that focus is on seeing all the big ideas at the price of students not having time to really master and remember all the computations along the way.

the way i see it, education is a gift. the way it's currently packaged, throwing so much at students at once, kills it for a lot of them. some students are able to sucessfully input things quick enough to really understand what's going on and succeed, but for many, what should be exciting material to explore gets turned into a tedious chore of computations and essays that have little to no meaning behind it. they're running the rat race and getting not too much more out of it long term than the numbers that say they know just enough to pass.

if you can't tell, i'm a bit frustrated lately. i get frustrated with the gaps of knowledge my students have from previous courses, but then again i understand where it comes from too. on the whole i don't think that they're lazy. i think they're way too overstretched in academic commitments. i guess the best i can do IS to start each friday fresh and hope i reach the ones who are open to looking for motivation and real understanding... and thank my lucky stars when i'm fortunate to get a whole group of them that clicks and really is in the game for the right reasons (out of the 9 sections i've taught to date i've probably had 1.5 of those...)

thoughts? reactions? am i just crazy, overtired, and getting delusional?

end of rant... fun with students and polar and triple integrals in 8.5 hours.

night y'all.