analyze this

smswtshnn: explain...
lkp 42 42 42: is that a command?
lkp 42 42 42: dude
smswtshnn: it is a .... request
smswtshnn: i don't know how to spell beseech, or i'd use that word :-P
lkp 42 42 42: dude
lkp 42 42 42: i think it's beseach
smswtshnn: dude, i think you're right
smswtshnn: llama
lkp 42 42 42: no just like everytime i'm in the car since september and am anywhere near another car i like forsee myself crashing into them and dying... and it's getting worse not better
lkp 42 42 42: i think it's because i know so many people who died in car wrecks last semester
lkp 42 42 42: like i was thrilled on the roadtrip
lkp 42 42 42: but certain i was going to crash somewhere on each leg in the back of my head just because it happened to nicole, and alan, and a friend's mom, and and and
lkp 42 42 42: and i'm done
lkp 42 42 42: the end
lkp 42 42 42: and someone totally pulled out on me and i had to slam on the breaks on the way back just now
lkp 42 42 42: which did not help the syndrome
lkp 42 42 42: break=brake
smswtshnn: i see..............
lkp 42 42 42: the thing is i'm not really concerned or freaked out, just like "oh huh, that's a possibility at any time, you never know"
smswtshnn: that's gotta be hard to deal with
smswtshnn: yeah, i know what you mean
lkp 42 42 42: so i'm weird
lkp 42 42 42: you knew that
lkp 42 42 42: the end
smswtshnn: i've had weird psychoses like that in the past, too
smswtshnn: you were okay on the road trip? or not so much...?
lkp 42 42 42: i was fine on the road trip
lkp 42 42 42: i ENJOY driving
smswtshnn: good
lkp 42 42 42: it's how i destress
lkp 42 42 42: but when i'm in the car i forsee myself dying
lkp 42 42 42: when i'm in any other situation less than sitting still playing cards or in the classroom or something i foresee myself dying somehow
lkp 42 42 42: residual dealing w/ last semester
lkp 42 42 42: that's all
lkp 42 42 42: you asked, you got it
smswtshnn: i do that sometimes with buses, whenever i'm walking or biking near one -- i'm convinced it's going to kill me
lkp 42 42 42: dude
smswtshnn: i also have a weird psychotic things with knives
lkp 42 42 42: really, i'm honestly pretty ambivalent, i just forsee myself dying in a lot of situations, and i'm more bothered by the frequency of it than the fact that that's what i'm thinking of
lkp 42 42 42: the end
smswtshnn: whenever i'm holding a sharp one, i visualize myself stabbing the people around me, or just as often stabbing myself
lkp 42 42 42: dude
smswtshnn: (so don't stand by me when i have a knife!)
lkp 42 42 42: yeah, i see it falling and getting my wrist
lkp 42 42 42: i stay away from them
smswtshnn: seriously, i don't like knives, though i'm getting better about it

etc. etc. etc.

i'm so freakin weird... the end