it's been a relatively eventful day in lara terms...
jenny (one of two HS friends i still keep in touch with) is in town this weekend since her sister graduates from college in arkansas tomorrow. today though, we:
* had breakfast at brother juniper's (a small breakfast cafe in midtown memphis that's been voted "best breakfast in the city" for years and years... it was great)
* visited the national ornamental metal museum, which was quite fun. the rest of my family has all been there at various times in the past but not me. it's a cute little place, and usually you can see blacksmiths hard at work, etc. and they always having rotating displays of cool metalwork... the current exhibit is "from mineral to metal" so for each metalwork piece they had on display, they had raw copper, titanium, etc. on display next to it. some of the pieces are really elaborate and cool... the museum grounds is high on a bluff right over the mississippi river south of downtown and used to be an old military hospital complex, so it's interesting to wander about outdoors too.... lots of fun.
* after the metal museum we were hungry again so we parked on beale street, which is currently packed thanks to memphis in may type tourists, etc.... after walking a bit, we finally settled on huey's... i'd never been to the downtown one before, so that was fun... as they have "the best burgers in memphis", we decided we were creating our own "best of" tour for the day...
now, no more jenny... she and her folks are headed west, and my mom wants me to come visit her classroom before she takes her 8th graders on their class trip to gatlinburg next week... so like a good kid, i'll show up and say hi to everyone and let her show off... i was *only* a student there for 9 years, an employee for 4 years, and been back there several times a year ever since... :P
before i turn this off and head out to the school, here's one more reason to love memphis:
i DON'T feel like an out of place ogre of a person. in NJ, yes, there's diversity, but most of the white girls i come into contact with are quite a bit shorter than me, have much smaller frames, and aspire to dress quite a bit differently than me. i'm fine how i am, but i definitely am not "from around there"... here, being tall and a little rounder doesn't make me stick out, it's more the status quo. being me and being here, i don't feel too tall or too round or too anything, i feel like i actually more or less fit in here, which is rare and nice! maybe it's local prejudice but i feel like people are friendlier here too. unlike the innate prejudice *against* the South i find frequently when elsewhere, i don't find prejudice against other regions as much here. people are fine with just being without worrying about who's better or who's worse, and i like that.
done rambling... time to go make faces at a room full of 8th graders who i last worked with when they were in kindergarten... this should be entertaining.
later dudes!
Friday, May 12, 2006
Thursday, May 11, 2006
crunching numbers...
while balancing my checkbook from the drive south, i thought this was interesting:
many people i know always ask "why on earth do you *drive* the 1100ish miles from NJ to TN every year instead of flying... wouldn't flying be simpler and cheaper?"
the usual suspect reasons are:
* i love driving, it's my stress relief.
* if i drive, i can visit family and friends along the way (e.g. i can visit my grandma in chicago, old profs in indiana, my aunt in pittsburgh, and many other friends along the way that i wouldn't see if i flew instead.
* my family lives on the fringe of town in a neighborhood with no sidewalks or safe place to walk... when they're all gone at work all day most days, if i didn't have a car, i'd be stuck at home the whole time instead of able to run errands, go to the library, etc., etc., etc... there's only so long i can deal with hyper parrots singing up a storm before i need a break.
but here's the deal sealer...
despite all my arguments which totally work for me (the 2nd out of the 3 above is the one that gets most people to say "ok, i guess that makes sense").... most people still comment "isn't it cheaper to fly, especially with all these rising gas prices?
the answer is actually no.
cost of gas for me to get from NJ to TN in the past two days: $126.48 (and i still have over half a tank left in the car)
double that and you get to $252.96
on the other hand, looking at expedia for round trip tickets between newark and memphis a month in advance, they start at $324 round trip and go up from there. this does not include taxes or the round trip train ticket from the train station near my house to the airport.
summary: driving STILL saves me $100ish dollars for the round trip, plus i have mobility while i'm home, and the ability to see people along the way.
not bad, just thought that was interesting.
the end.
many people i know always ask "why on earth do you *drive* the 1100ish miles from NJ to TN every year instead of flying... wouldn't flying be simpler and cheaper?"
the usual suspect reasons are:
* i love driving, it's my stress relief.
* if i drive, i can visit family and friends along the way (e.g. i can visit my grandma in chicago, old profs in indiana, my aunt in pittsburgh, and many other friends along the way that i wouldn't see if i flew instead.
* my family lives on the fringe of town in a neighborhood with no sidewalks or safe place to walk... when they're all gone at work all day most days, if i didn't have a car, i'd be stuck at home the whole time instead of able to run errands, go to the library, etc., etc., etc... there's only so long i can deal with hyper parrots singing up a storm before i need a break.
but here's the deal sealer...
despite all my arguments which totally work for me (the 2nd out of the 3 above is the one that gets most people to say "ok, i guess that makes sense").... most people still comment "isn't it cheaper to fly, especially with all these rising gas prices?
the answer is actually no.
cost of gas for me to get from NJ to TN in the past two days: $126.48 (and i still have over half a tank left in the car)
double that and you get to $252.96
on the other hand, looking at expedia for round trip tickets between newark and memphis a month in advance, they start at $324 round trip and go up from there. this does not include taxes or the round trip train ticket from the train station near my house to the airport.
summary: driving STILL saves me $100ish dollars for the round trip, plus i have mobility while i'm home, and the ability to see people along the way.
not bad, just thought that was interesting.
the end.
back in memphis...
some things are always the same -- dinner late at night at perkins with my family and a waitress who has known us all by name for the past 10 years... tons of rain makes the front yard a swamp, etc. etc. etc.
but some things are subtly different
* there's a new dog (who i've met) and a new llama (who i haven't met yet)
* alice, our oldest cat went from being quite a tubby cat (we used to call her the watermelon kitty because she looked like she had swallowed one whole), and since january she's lost all her weight to be literally skin and bones... you can see her ribs even though she eats well... i didn't recognize her and she's looked identical for 10 years... she goes to the vet on friday
who knows what else has changed... the cat thing worried me a bit...
mostly just an excuse to post and say "i'm here"...
tomorrow: day one of entertaining myself while everyone else is out at work... TONS of fun. :P
first, to start watching scrubs season 3 on dvd (it came out yesterday and i bought my copy at a mall in pittsburgh last night :) ) until i crash.
night y'all! be parties.
but some things are subtly different
* there's a new dog (who i've met) and a new llama (who i haven't met yet)
* alice, our oldest cat went from being quite a tubby cat (we used to call her the watermelon kitty because she looked like she had swallowed one whole), and since january she's lost all her weight to be literally skin and bones... you can see her ribs even though she eats well... i didn't recognize her and she's looked identical for 10 years... she goes to the vet on friday
who knows what else has changed... the cat thing worried me a bit...
mostly just an excuse to post and say "i'm here"...
tomorrow: day one of entertaining myself while everyone else is out at work... TONS of fun. :P
first, to start watching scrubs season 3 on dvd (it came out yesterday and i bought my copy at a mall in pittsburgh last night :) ) until i crash.
night y'all! be parties.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
more things that make me smile
(1) huge barbeque dinner with ben; it wasn't southern barbeque, but it was still respectably good.
(2) new eclectic music playlist for the car this week:
1. i'm gonna be (500 miles) ~ the proclaimers
2. the entertainer ~ billy joel
3. song of the south ~ alabama
4. working days ~ echelon
5. the modern age ~ the strokes
6. i still haven't found what i'm looking for ~ U2
7. stuck in a moment you can't get out of ~ U2
8. bittersweet symphony ~ the verve
9. closing time ~ semisonic
10. south side ~ moby & gwen stefani
11. where the streets have no name ~ pet shop boys
12. since i met you ~ dc talk
13. tubthumping ~ chumbawamba
14. mmmbop ~ hanson
15. when i think about angels ~ jamie oneal
16. the light ~ michelle tumes
17. walking in memphis ~ marc cohn
18. go light your world ~ chris rice
(3) emails like this:
(just as with last semester, i'm going through a bit of "student withdrawal". during finals week it's exhausting and i'm about ready for things to be done, but after spending so much time working with students for several months, to instantly not see/hear from most of them again ever after the final, it's suddenly a very quick change and a little lonely (word choice?)... especially with as much fun as i had with my sections this semester... so getting this tonight while feeling that way, made me smile)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lara,
I kind of rushed out of the exam so i didn't get to say good-bye
I want to thank you for a wonderful semester of recitations. THey helped me so much. Your reviews
were amazing. You put all the information together in such an organized way!!!!! it was
beautiful. You're a great teacher!
I wish you the best in all that you do from here on out.
Again thank you sooo much for your time... and your patience
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i think i'm actually going to miss teaching in the fall even if a semester off is good for my research agenda... who knew blabing calculus at lecture halls full of students could actually feel rewarding?
time to sleep... ben is actually coming to church with me and paul in the morning. born and raised catholic, last weekend going to lutheran church with jessica (his girlfriend of 6+ months, who is also one of my undergrad friends) was his first time in a non-catholic worship service. i told him he's welcome to come with me and paul anytime he's in NJ instead of in DE with jessica, and he decided tomorrow morning is the perfect time to take me up on it... should be fun.
first, though, to sleep!
night.
(2) new eclectic music playlist for the car this week:
1. i'm gonna be (500 miles) ~ the proclaimers
2. the entertainer ~ billy joel
3. song of the south ~ alabama
4. working days ~ echelon
5. the modern age ~ the strokes
6. i still haven't found what i'm looking for ~ U2
7. stuck in a moment you can't get out of ~ U2
8. bittersweet symphony ~ the verve
9. closing time ~ semisonic
10. south side ~ moby & gwen stefani
11. where the streets have no name ~ pet shop boys
12. since i met you ~ dc talk
13. tubthumping ~ chumbawamba
14. mmmbop ~ hanson
15. when i think about angels ~ jamie oneal
16. the light ~ michelle tumes
17. walking in memphis ~ marc cohn
18. go light your world ~ chris rice
(3) emails like this:
(just as with last semester, i'm going through a bit of "student withdrawal". during finals week it's exhausting and i'm about ready for things to be done, but after spending so much time working with students for several months, to instantly not see/hear from most of them again ever after the final, it's suddenly a very quick change and a little lonely (word choice?)... especially with as much fun as i had with my sections this semester... so getting this tonight while feeling that way, made me smile)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lara,
I kind of rushed out of the exam so i didn't get to say good-bye
I want to thank you for a wonderful semester of recitations. THey helped me so much. Your reviews
were amazing. You put all the information together in such an organized way!!!!! it was
beautiful. You're a great teacher!
I wish you the best in all that you do from here on out.
Again thank you sooo much for your time... and your patience
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i think i'm actually going to miss teaching in the fall even if a semester off is good for my research agenda... who knew blabing calculus at lecture halls full of students could actually feel rewarding?
time to sleep... ben is actually coming to church with me and paul in the morning. born and raised catholic, last weekend going to lutheran church with jessica (his girlfriend of 6+ months, who is also one of my undergrad friends) was his first time in a non-catholic worship service. i told him he's welcome to come with me and paul anytime he's in NJ instead of in DE with jessica, and he decided tomorrow morning is the perfect time to take me up on it... should be fun.
first, though, to sleep!
night.
Saturday, May 06, 2006
Thursday, May 04, 2006
dude...
someone broke into the math server. if you go visit the main math page, it's black with a strange message in italian on it. we'll see how long it takes them to fix that back...
in other news, yesterday was eight consecutive hours of entertaining students with math and chalk without even a lunch break... i'm TIRED
tomorrow, i gotta be out the door by 7:15 so as to entertain my students for their final. i'm wearing my new "math is hard" shirt for moral support. :P then grading all the live-long day.
this is the weekend to learn french. i made it through 9 pages of a book on hypergraphs while waiting on my oil change earlier today... we'll see how much i get done while my students are testing tomorrow (seriously, the prof told me to bring something to work on... you answer questions while they work but not consecutively for 3 whole hours)
at least there's no problem with falling asleep quickly lately... i'm too exhausted to do anything less.
night y'all.
in other news, yesterday was eight consecutive hours of entertaining students with math and chalk without even a lunch break... i'm TIRED
tomorrow, i gotta be out the door by 7:15 so as to entertain my students for their final. i'm wearing my new "math is hard" shirt for moral support. :P then grading all the live-long day.
this is the weekend to learn french. i made it through 9 pages of a book on hypergraphs while waiting on my oil change earlier today... we'll see how much i get done while my students are testing tomorrow (seriously, the prof told me to bring something to work on... you answer questions while they work but not consecutively for 3 whole hours)
at least there's no problem with falling asleep quickly lately... i'm too exhausted to do anything less.
night y'all.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
getting there...
as of 15 minutes ago, my final project for my one and only graduate class this semester is done.
to do between now and monday?
tomorrow:
* tutor from 10-1
* run a calc 3 review session from 1-4
(that's 6 straight hours of entertaining undergrads with math without a break)
thursday:
* meeting with several of my students who want to talk about calc in addition to the review session
* oil change for my car
friday:
* proctor my students' final from 8-11am
* grade finals until 7 pm or so with the prof. i TA for
besides the above which has specific times, there's also:
* learn to read math in french and pass that exam before i leave town
* accomplish at least *something* more research-wise to show my advisor by monday
* pack
getting there... will be glad when *all* of the above is done!
the end.
happy wednesday?
to do between now and monday?
tomorrow:
* tutor from 10-1
* run a calc 3 review session from 1-4
(that's 6 straight hours of entertaining undergrads with math without a break)
thursday:
* meeting with several of my students who want to talk about calc in addition to the review session
* oil change for my car
friday:
* proctor my students' final from 8-11am
* grade finals until 7 pm or so with the prof. i TA for
besides the above which has specific times, there's also:
* learn to read math in french and pass that exam before i leave town
* accomplish at least *something* more research-wise to show my advisor by monday
* pack
getting there... will be glad when *all* of the above is done!
the end.
happy wednesday?
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
new playlist...
what does *this* say about my mood recently? (only *i* would put U2, hungarian techno, country, and a "song" that's really a spoken graduation address put to background music on the same disc)
1. where the streets have no name - U2
2. hey you, it's me - michael w. smith
3. how do you like me now? - toby keith
4. my next thirty years - tim mcgraw
5. parizsi lany - groovehouse
6. isaac - madonna
7. take me out - franz ferdinand
8. better days - goo goo dolls
9. bad day - daniel powter
10. how to save a life - the fray
11. boston - augustana
12. hallelujah - john cale
13. as long as we're here - kristy starling
14. you raise me up - josh groban
15. all will be well - the gabe dixon band
16. oakey mountain stomp - big city sunrise
17. everybody's free (to wear sunscreen) - baz luhrmann
1. where the streets have no name - U2
2. hey you, it's me - michael w. smith
3. how do you like me now? - toby keith
4. my next thirty years - tim mcgraw
5. parizsi lany - groovehouse
6. isaac - madonna
7. take me out - franz ferdinand
8. better days - goo goo dolls
9. bad day - daniel powter
10. how to save a life - the fray
11. boston - augustana
12. hallelujah - john cale
13. as long as we're here - kristy starling
14. you raise me up - josh groban
15. all will be well - the gabe dixon band
16. oakey mountain stomp - big city sunrise
17. everybody's free (to wear sunscreen) - baz luhrmann
Monday, May 01, 2006
tired
scott: so there was a farmer with two cows and he couldn't tell them apart, so he weighed them and the white cow weighed 2 pounds more than the black cow
me: ok
scott: no, no, no. you're supposed to laugh. it's a funny joke.
me: i don't get it.
scott: really? do i need to explain this to you? (repeats himself with more dramatic pauses between words)
me: (silence)
scott: seriously, dude, it's a cow joke. it's not deep. still nothing?
me: nope, i'm that exhausted.
scott: the cows are freakin different colors. wow, you ARE tired.
me: ok
scott: no, no, no. you're supposed to laugh. it's a funny joke.
me: i don't get it.
scott: really? do i need to explain this to you? (repeats himself with more dramatic pauses between words)
me: (silence)
scott: seriously, dude, it's a cow joke. it's not deep. still nothing?
me: nope, i'm that exhausted.
scott: the cows are freakin different colors. wow, you ARE tired.
i like my advisor...
this is proof yet again that i have an ideal thesis advisor.
i came into our weekly research meeting an hour ago and he asked how things were going with life in general.... he's concerned about student stresslevel around finals week, etc. i said overall things were going well, but i needed to draw a map on the chalkboard of who proved what.
i gave him all the facts of who has what bijection and that i think what i've been working on is kind of implicit in the paper i found yesterday.
z: "so you're saying you may have been scooped by m------ by a year?"
me: "i think so.... and i just found out yesterday"
z: "well then, i think your proof is more explict and you can be very complementary of m------ in your abstract so that you don't get into trouble. it's still worth submitting."
me: "i guess"
z: "yeah, really it's all about marketing, and you have a month to figure out how to market yourself appropriately... besides m------ is a brilliant and wise and very experienced mathematician... to be beaten by him and only be beaten by a year is very impressive"
still moderately irritated, but at least my advisor is good at putting happy and believeable spins on even really frustrating days.
the end.
i came into our weekly research meeting an hour ago and he asked how things were going with life in general.... he's concerned about student stresslevel around finals week, etc. i said overall things were going well, but i needed to draw a map on the chalkboard of who proved what.
i gave him all the facts of who has what bijection and that i think what i've been working on is kind of implicit in the paper i found yesterday.
z: "so you're saying you may have been scooped by m------ by a year?"
me: "i think so.... and i just found out yesterday"
z: "well then, i think your proof is more explict and you can be very complementary of m------ in your abstract so that you don't get into trouble. it's still worth submitting."
me: "i guess"
z: "yeah, really it's all about marketing, and you have a month to figure out how to market yourself appropriately... besides m------ is a brilliant and wise and very experienced mathematician... to be beaten by him and only be beaten by a year is very impressive"
still moderately irritated, but at least my advisor is good at putting happy and believeable spins on even really frustrating days.
the end.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
one of those days....
it's been a bad math day... actually a bad couple of math days.
one could see movies like good will hunting or a beautiful mind or proof and get the picture that all brilliant mathematicians eventually go crazy in the process of things... but really, after a weekend like this one, it's completely evident to me how math really *can* drive someone mad.... and i'm not even one of the super brilliant type people.
to make things easier for me, here's your math definition of the post: bijection
technically a bijection is a map that's one-to-one and onto, but in less "math-y" terms it's a special kind of function from one set to another set used to show that they're the same size. (please don't be afraid just yet)
for example
say i have a bunch of people in a room and i have the numbers 1-10 written on notecards, and i start giving notecards to people.
if i don't give more than one notecard to the same person AND i give a notecard to everyone AND i use up all my notecards, then that says there are exactly 10 people in the room (because i paired them up with the notecards), so the "giving notecards to people" function is a bijection from the set of notecards to the set of people.
that wasn't too scary, right?
math people use bijections all the time to show two sets of complicated things are the same size. usually it's not notecards and people. in my case it's a special kind of permutation and a special kind of sequence.
ok, so i can now safely say "bijection" in the rest of this post.
timeline:
december: i came up with a bijection from thing A to thing B. i was super excited
january - february: i studied for my oral exam and thought nothing about research
march: i wrote up a nice 4 page paper explaining my bijection from december
april: in anticipation of the conference i plan to go to in june, i double checked several places to make sure i was the first person to come up with this bijection (i don't want to present someone else's old result at the conference in front of a lot of people who are older and smarter than me, right?). abstracts for talks are due tomorrow (may 1).
two weeks ago: i hear back from one mathematician that yes, he proved the same result 8 years ago in his thesis, but he did it analytically, NOT with a bijection. he also commented that thing C and thing A have the same size and to his knowledge there's no bijection between them.
one week ago: i go to the wisconsin conference armed with this knowledge and think hard and come up with an idea for a bijection from thing B to thing C (since i already have a bijection from thing A to thing B, putting these together would give me a bijection from thing A to thing C)
for the past 7 days: i work hard trying to figure out the kinks... when my bijection idea works for 2815 out of 2814 cases, i have a hunch that i'm on the right track and just have some small detail to figure out, but after several days of trying, no luck... i spent 8 hours on this yesterday and 6 hours on friday not to mention other days before that spent thinking about this.
today, 4pm: while doing one more literature search to be extra sure i've come up with something new, even if i don't find the bijection from B to C before the conference, i come across a paper from last year that has a bijection from A to C. it's much shorter than what i have from A to B even, so i'm crushed
today, 5-8pm: chatting with eric about it, he convinces me that unless they're identical i still have something useful to show, especially since my bijection actually gives a way to count the darn things, not just show that they're the same size. i counter that it's much clunkier than the other bijection i found and only goes half as far. i don't want to give a whole talk on one bijection if it's been partially done already.
today 8:30-9:45pm: frustrated with math, i beat my time for walk/jogging 5 miles from yesterday by 10 full minutes... at least being irritated is good for something.
today 9:45-10pm: i vent to leigh about the same irritations with proofs/what to actually submit to the conference tomorrow, etc. she disappears.
today 10pm-now: still trying to figure out my bijection from thing B to thing C, and things look moderately promising but i'm still not convinced how significant of a result it is anymore now that it's more or less been done bijectively before even if my bijection is a new one... leigh reappears around 10:30 with ice cream.
seriously, teaching is one thing. that's a performing art of sorts, and you can get good at it if you want even if you suck as a researcher, but math research is a creative art... but not even just creative and please the critics... creative and either it's true or it isn't, not just some people like it and some don't... true or false. it's really frustrating to put many many hours into the "creative" bit and have nothing to show for it, or to discover you've been out-creative-d by someone else. i did hear stories last weekend of grad students who always would prove things, then search the literature and find their results had been proven before, but in the 19th century, and they'd be really excited about when they made it to proving things that had already been done but in the 20th century. i guess i can be happy that the relevant related material to what i'm doing was just done in the last decade? it's just such a rollercoaster ride between irritated for working so long at no result, elation at thinking you have something to show for your time, and defeat at finding it already done. (and no, i'm not extreme in feeling like this... every math person i know does in spurts)
end of rant.
in moderately amusing news, mental floss (my favorite magazine ever) has a "mad scientist of the month" column every issue... this time around is erdos (most published mathematician ever, and quite a colorful character)... so mental floss gets major kudos from me.
in other amusing news, i saw someone with this shirt at the conference last weekend and i found it hilarious. i ordered myself one yesterday, and hope it comes in time to wear to either my students' review session or final this week. :P (because i'm ever so encouraging of a TA).
seriously, done ranting... it's not like any of you will make it past my attempt at explaining "bijection" in everyday words paragraphs and paragraphs ago anyhow.
night.
one could see movies like good will hunting or a beautiful mind or proof and get the picture that all brilliant mathematicians eventually go crazy in the process of things... but really, after a weekend like this one, it's completely evident to me how math really *can* drive someone mad.... and i'm not even one of the super brilliant type people.
to make things easier for me, here's your math definition of the post: bijection
technically a bijection is a map that's one-to-one and onto, but in less "math-y" terms it's a special kind of function from one set to another set used to show that they're the same size. (please don't be afraid just yet)
for example
say i have a bunch of people in a room and i have the numbers 1-10 written on notecards, and i start giving notecards to people.
if i don't give more than one notecard to the same person AND i give a notecard to everyone AND i use up all my notecards, then that says there are exactly 10 people in the room (because i paired them up with the notecards), so the "giving notecards to people" function is a bijection from the set of notecards to the set of people.
that wasn't too scary, right?
math people use bijections all the time to show two sets of complicated things are the same size. usually it's not notecards and people. in my case it's a special kind of permutation and a special kind of sequence.
ok, so i can now safely say "bijection" in the rest of this post.
timeline:
december: i came up with a bijection from thing A to thing B. i was super excited
january - february: i studied for my oral exam and thought nothing about research
march: i wrote up a nice 4 page paper explaining my bijection from december
april: in anticipation of the conference i plan to go to in june, i double checked several places to make sure i was the first person to come up with this bijection (i don't want to present someone else's old result at the conference in front of a lot of people who are older and smarter than me, right?). abstracts for talks are due tomorrow (may 1).
two weeks ago: i hear back from one mathematician that yes, he proved the same result 8 years ago in his thesis, but he did it analytically, NOT with a bijection. he also commented that thing C and thing A have the same size and to his knowledge there's no bijection between them.
one week ago: i go to the wisconsin conference armed with this knowledge and think hard and come up with an idea for a bijection from thing B to thing C (since i already have a bijection from thing A to thing B, putting these together would give me a bijection from thing A to thing C)
for the past 7 days: i work hard trying to figure out the kinks... when my bijection idea works for 2815 out of 2814 cases, i have a hunch that i'm on the right track and just have some small detail to figure out, but after several days of trying, no luck... i spent 8 hours on this yesterday and 6 hours on friday not to mention other days before that spent thinking about this.
today, 4pm: while doing one more literature search to be extra sure i've come up with something new, even if i don't find the bijection from B to C before the conference, i come across a paper from last year that has a bijection from A to C. it's much shorter than what i have from A to B even, so i'm crushed
today, 5-8pm: chatting with eric about it, he convinces me that unless they're identical i still have something useful to show, especially since my bijection actually gives a way to count the darn things, not just show that they're the same size. i counter that it's much clunkier than the other bijection i found and only goes half as far. i don't want to give a whole talk on one bijection if it's been partially done already.
today 8:30-9:45pm: frustrated with math, i beat my time for walk/jogging 5 miles from yesterday by 10 full minutes... at least being irritated is good for something.
today 9:45-10pm: i vent to leigh about the same irritations with proofs/what to actually submit to the conference tomorrow, etc. she disappears.
today 10pm-now: still trying to figure out my bijection from thing B to thing C, and things look moderately promising but i'm still not convinced how significant of a result it is anymore now that it's more or less been done bijectively before even if my bijection is a new one... leigh reappears around 10:30 with ice cream.
seriously, teaching is one thing. that's a performing art of sorts, and you can get good at it if you want even if you suck as a researcher, but math research is a creative art... but not even just creative and please the critics... creative and either it's true or it isn't, not just some people like it and some don't... true or false. it's really frustrating to put many many hours into the "creative" bit and have nothing to show for it, or to discover you've been out-creative-d by someone else. i did hear stories last weekend of grad students who always would prove things, then search the literature and find their results had been proven before, but in the 19th century, and they'd be really excited about when they made it to proving things that had already been done but in the 20th century. i guess i can be happy that the relevant related material to what i'm doing was just done in the last decade? it's just such a rollercoaster ride between irritated for working so long at no result, elation at thinking you have something to show for your time, and defeat at finding it already done. (and no, i'm not extreme in feeling like this... every math person i know does in spurts)
end of rant.
in moderately amusing news, mental floss (my favorite magazine ever) has a "mad scientist of the month" column every issue... this time around is erdos (most published mathematician ever, and quite a colorful character)... so mental floss gets major kudos from me.
in other amusing news, i saw someone with this shirt at the conference last weekend and i found it hilarious. i ordered myself one yesterday, and hope it comes in time to wear to either my students' review session or final this week. :P (because i'm ever so encouraging of a TA).
seriously, done ranting... it's not like any of you will make it past my attempt at explaining "bijection" in everyday words paragraphs and paragraphs ago anyhow.
night.
dude
if you haven't heard/seen what the president did at the white house correspondents' dinner last night, you should definitely check out the video. it's freakin hilarious.
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
things that make me smile...
(1) emails from happy students:
besides what happened in my 2nd section today (see previous post), in the last half hour i've gotten these emails from two different students...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Even though you were completely dead tired this morning, you did an
awesome job teaching and somehow you still managed to get all of the
answers right and still answer everyone's questions.
Thanks
P.S. I think being in Calc III with you as our TA was more our pleasure
than it was yours. Thank you more than you can ever imagine.
P.S.S. Keep up the good work you math machine!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
... By the way, thanks for being a great TA, you helped me understand multivariable
calculus much better than I thought I could!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(2) fun pictures with old friends:
click here for my wisconsin pictures from this weekend
besides what happened in my 2nd section today (see previous post), in the last half hour i've gotten these emails from two different students...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Even though you were completely dead tired this morning, you did an
awesome job teaching and somehow you still managed to get all of the
answers right and still answer everyone's questions.
Thanks
P.S. I think being in Calc III with you as our TA was more our pleasure
than it was yours. Thank you more than you can ever imagine.
P.S.S. Keep up the good work you math machine!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
... By the way, thanks for being a great TA, you helped me understand multivariable
calculus much better than I thought I could!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(2) fun pictures with old friends:
click here for my wisconsin pictures from this weekend
how yay is this?
back in NJ, and i just taught for 5 hours straight on 4 hours of sleep.... this is also the last tuesday of classes, so other than an optional exam review session next week, i'm done teaching for the semester.
despite sleep deprivation, my second section totally made my day though. they're the ones who usually make me laugh, (and they still did today).
2 students stayed after class to ask me questions about my research...like they sincerely cared and wanted to hear about it after listening to me yack about calculus for the whole semester....
BUT what got me even more than that was:
when i finished the last homework problem, and announced "ok! you're free to go... no more calculus recitation this semester", one kid looked sad for a split second and then started clapping, and the whole section joined in to give me a standing ovation.
exhausted, but a standing ovation from my entertaining section TOTALLY made my day. :)
yay for cool students. :P
happy tuesday. :)
despite sleep deprivation, my second section totally made my day though. they're the ones who usually make me laugh, (and they still did today).
2 students stayed after class to ask me questions about my research...like they sincerely cared and wanted to hear about it after listening to me yack about calculus for the whole semester....
BUT what got me even more than that was:
when i finished the last homework problem, and announced "ok! you're free to go... no more calculus recitation this semester", one kid looked sad for a split second and then started clapping, and the whole section joined in to give me a standing ovation.
exhausted, but a standing ovation from my entertaining section TOTALLY made my day. :)
yay for cool students. :P
happy tuesday. :)
Monday, April 24, 2006
no more wisconsin....
here's the first of many photos:
so far i just have the digital ones aek took on the trip... mine (regular manual film) should get developed tomorrow..
i SO wish i was still gone... oh well... tomorrow teaching should be *loads* of fun on little sleep... wish me luck!
so far i just have the digital ones aek took on the trip... mine (regular manual film) should get developed tomorrow..
i SO wish i was still gone... oh well... tomorrow teaching should be *loads* of fun on little sleep... wish me luck!
some interesting reading...
while aek packs for the airport, i have half an hour to kill... here's the most entertaining headlines i've found so far:
* Comet Won't Hit Earth (Or Anything Else)
* Black Holes are Actually Green
* Interstellar Deathray Not Likely to Hit Earth
and last but not least:
* Top 10 Ways to Destroy Earth
enjoy!
* Comet Won't Hit Earth (Or Anything Else)
* Black Holes are Actually Green
* Interstellar Deathray Not Likely to Hit Earth
and last but not least:
* Top 10 Ways to Destroy Earth
enjoy!
in case you're wondering...
it's fun to end up on a field trip with a bunch of wisconsin 4th graders for the morning.
and yes, that, (and lunch with amanda) is what i've accomplished today.
go figure.
off to the airport in a couple hours... too bad this weekend is nearly over.
new jersey people, see you again soon. :P
and yes, that, (and lunch with amanda) is what i've accomplished today.
go figure.
off to the airport in a couple hours... too bad this weekend is nearly over.
new jersey people, see you again soon. :P
day 3 of crazy wisconsin fun...
today...
* several more talks... my advisor was even louder and more enthusiastic in today's keynote talk than yesterday's
* upon entering the math building at 9 this morning, one guy i hadn't met came up to me and said he overheard me say i was going to the iceland conference in june... we talked about that for a few minutes since he'll be there too, and when i heard where he goes to school, i asked if he knows my friend steve, who is also a student there. he said no, but....
* the guy sitting in front of me turned around and said "steve!? i know steve... my little brother was his roommate at valpo... how do you know him?"... small world.
* after the conference, seeing patrick one more time, and dinner with the few conference people who didn't head out of town straight off, there was ice cream with aek's thai friends (i didn't understand much of their conversations but they were all nice), exploring the capital building with aek, studying for awhile on a terrace over one of the lakes here (i think i came up with the proof i've been looking for for a couple weeks! so yay for good spaces for studying and being insightful!!! :P), and then i ended up....
*having dinner with kate of all people... kate is one of scott's friends from his undergrad here and she's been out to visit NJ a few times and she's exceedingly friendly. i didn't have a way to get in touch with her, but several of the wisconsin math grad students who were at the conference told her i was around, and then helped us get in touch... here's the ultimate small world kicker of the whole weekend:
* after dinner and ice cream, kate, aek, and i all headed back to our respective places to stay the night... kate lives directly across the street from aek's friend that i'm staying with... totally unplanned to see her, and to find out that we've been *that* close all weekend is totally crazy!
tomorrow is:
*actually get a tour of the capital building
*lunch with amanda (budapest semester roommate)
*then off to the airport and back to jersey.
completely exciting right?... (not so much on the third one... i like being out of town... doht...)
happy almost monday to all y'all. :P
* several more talks... my advisor was even louder and more enthusiastic in today's keynote talk than yesterday's
* upon entering the math building at 9 this morning, one guy i hadn't met came up to me and said he overheard me say i was going to the iceland conference in june... we talked about that for a few minutes since he'll be there too, and when i heard where he goes to school, i asked if he knows my friend steve, who is also a student there. he said no, but....
* the guy sitting in front of me turned around and said "steve!? i know steve... my little brother was his roommate at valpo... how do you know him?"... small world.
* after the conference, seeing patrick one more time, and dinner with the few conference people who didn't head out of town straight off, there was ice cream with aek's thai friends (i didn't understand much of their conversations but they were all nice), exploring the capital building with aek, studying for awhile on a terrace over one of the lakes here (i think i came up with the proof i've been looking for for a couple weeks! so yay for good spaces for studying and being insightful!!! :P), and then i ended up....
*having dinner with kate of all people... kate is one of scott's friends from his undergrad here and she's been out to visit NJ a few times and she's exceedingly friendly. i didn't have a way to get in touch with her, but several of the wisconsin math grad students who were at the conference told her i was around, and then helped us get in touch... here's the ultimate small world kicker of the whole weekend:
* after dinner and ice cream, kate, aek, and i all headed back to our respective places to stay the night... kate lives directly across the street from aek's friend that i'm staying with... totally unplanned to see her, and to find out that we've been *that* close all weekend is totally crazy!
tomorrow is:
*actually get a tour of the capital building
*lunch with amanda (budapest semester roommate)
*then off to the airport and back to jersey.
completely exciting right?... (not so much on the third one... i like being out of town... doht...)
happy almost monday to all y'all. :P
Sunday, April 23, 2006
& etc.
so i was totally wrong about the no email for the weekend gig., whatever.
conference is tons of fun.... you'd think 12 math talks by grad students and one super long talk by my advisor makes for a long boring day but it's rather fun. since aek and me followed dr. z. for lunch instead of eating with other students, we ate with 3 really famous math profs who teach at wisconsin here, which was a once in a lifetime deal -- extremely cool.
this evening at the conference dinner, etc. i've made friends with dot -- a 27 year old grad student from north carolina but at school in san francisco. it was the most beyond "hi, where are you at school? what do you study? are you giving a talk for the conference?" i got with anyone all day, and we had a fabulous time chatting it up for 4ish hours... half of that at the conference dinner and half of that at my REU friend ben's house party.
that's right... for the first time literally in years, i was in a house full of crazy people and loud music and several kegs of beer, and didn't totally flip out about it. i chatted with my friend ben (from my REU in texas who i hadn't seen in 5 years) for awhile, and i chatted with dot for most of the rest of the time... then aek and me made the 2 mile trek back to his friend's place.
i'm branching out (i.e. i tolerated being in a large group for social activity for several hours), making new friends, and learning lots of cool new math. definitely a quality weekend, and tomorrow's even more of it.
go ahead, be totally jealous... math conferences rock! :P
conference is tons of fun.... you'd think 12 math talks by grad students and one super long talk by my advisor makes for a long boring day but it's rather fun. since aek and me followed dr. z. for lunch instead of eating with other students, we ate with 3 really famous math profs who teach at wisconsin here, which was a once in a lifetime deal -- extremely cool.
this evening at the conference dinner, etc. i've made friends with dot -- a 27 year old grad student from north carolina but at school in san francisco. it was the most beyond "hi, where are you at school? what do you study? are you giving a talk for the conference?" i got with anyone all day, and we had a fabulous time chatting it up for 4ish hours... half of that at the conference dinner and half of that at my REU friend ben's house party.
that's right... for the first time literally in years, i was in a house full of crazy people and loud music and several kegs of beer, and didn't totally flip out about it. i chatted with my friend ben (from my REU in texas who i hadn't seen in 5 years) for awhile, and i chatted with dot for most of the rest of the time... then aek and me made the 2 mile trek back to his friend's place.
i'm branching out (i.e. i tolerated being in a large group for social activity for several hours), making new friends, and learning lots of cool new math. definitely a quality weekend, and tomorrow's even more of it.
go ahead, be totally jealous... math conferences rock! :P
Saturday, April 22, 2006
3 things are certain in life....
death, taxes, and if lara has a plane ticket, that flight is *guaranteed* to be delayed.
case in point: yesterday, i should have been out of new jersey by 1:45pm, and we took off at 5:15 instead.
now, i've spent an evening wandering around downtown madison with patrick (Budapest friend)... it took us 5 minutes of walking past each other to recognize one another at the airport... i have much longer hair than in budapest, have changed body shape by a lot, and don't wear glasses anymore... patrick on the other hand went from being clean shaven with very short hair and no glasses to very long bushy hair, and even more bushy beard, and wearing glasses... i guess it's good that we both recognized the other's eyes? oi...
it's fun to catch up... now i'm staying in an apartment with three thai guys... one who i know from rutgers, one who is that guy's college roommate, and one who is my friend's ex-roommate's current roommate... they all speak thai most of the time except the one who knows me to talk to me, and his ex-roommate to make sure i don't need anything. it's an entertaining dynamic for the weekend.
conference all day. bound to be a blast.
happy saturday from wisconsin!
case in point: yesterday, i should have been out of new jersey by 1:45pm, and we took off at 5:15 instead.
now, i've spent an evening wandering around downtown madison with patrick (Budapest friend)... it took us 5 minutes of walking past each other to recognize one another at the airport... i have much longer hair than in budapest, have changed body shape by a lot, and don't wear glasses anymore... patrick on the other hand went from being clean shaven with very short hair and no glasses to very long bushy hair, and even more bushy beard, and wearing glasses... i guess it's good that we both recognized the other's eyes? oi...
it's fun to catch up... now i'm staying in an apartment with three thai guys... one who i know from rutgers, one who is that guy's college roommate, and one who is my friend's ex-roommate's current roommate... they all speak thai most of the time except the one who knows me to talk to me, and his ex-roommate to make sure i don't need anything. it's an entertaining dynamic for the weekend.
conference all day. bound to be a blast.
happy saturday from wisconsin!
Friday, April 21, 2006
on the road again...
i wish it could literally be "on the road" and not on a plane instead, but whatever... this weekend is a break.
in 13 hours i'll be on a plane to wisconsin for a math grad student conference. my advisor's paying (*and* he's the keynote speaker, so that'll be entertaining)... 1.5 days of socializing with other math grad students who like the same kinds of math that i do (sounds like the epitome of fun, right? :P). the conference is just saturday/sunday, but i'll be in WI tomorrow afternoon up through late monday... i'm staying with a friend of a friend, so hopefully we'll all get along alright.
there's also definite plans to have lunch with amanda (my budapest semester roommate, now a bio grad student at madison, haven't seen her in 1.5 years), there's hope to meet up with patrick (math grad student at madison, friend from budapest semester, who i haven't seen in 3.5 years), and there's a slight chance of crossing paths with ben (madison math grad student and REU friend from my summer in texas, haven't seen in 5 years).
no matter what, no computer for the weekend means no answering tons of emails, and no ability to work on half my homework (since a large part of it is programming), which means i'll be forced to just relax for a few days (and be swamped when i get back, but whatever...)
here's my one problem: i like driving. if i'm travelling within the same continent, 90% of the time i drive. i'm used to being able to throw everything i could possibly need for 4 days into the trunk of my car. if i take an airplane, it's generally for a LONG trip to another country (although there are exceptions). summary: i'm NOT good at packing 4 days of stuff into one carry-on. i feel lonely without at least 6 books with me and unprepared that i can't have an extra layer of clothes in the trunk of my car "just in case"... i'll get over it.
i should have sooo been asleep hours ago... oops.
back monday -- a fantastic weekend to all y'all!
in 13 hours i'll be on a plane to wisconsin for a math grad student conference. my advisor's paying (*and* he's the keynote speaker, so that'll be entertaining)... 1.5 days of socializing with other math grad students who like the same kinds of math that i do (sounds like the epitome of fun, right? :P). the conference is just saturday/sunday, but i'll be in WI tomorrow afternoon up through late monday... i'm staying with a friend of a friend, so hopefully we'll all get along alright.
there's also definite plans to have lunch with amanda (my budapest semester roommate, now a bio grad student at madison, haven't seen her in 1.5 years), there's hope to meet up with patrick (math grad student at madison, friend from budapest semester, who i haven't seen in 3.5 years), and there's a slight chance of crossing paths with ben (madison math grad student and REU friend from my summer in texas, haven't seen in 5 years).
no matter what, no computer for the weekend means no answering tons of emails, and no ability to work on half my homework (since a large part of it is programming), which means i'll be forced to just relax for a few days (and be swamped when i get back, but whatever...)
here's my one problem: i like driving. if i'm travelling within the same continent, 90% of the time i drive. i'm used to being able to throw everything i could possibly need for 4 days into the trunk of my car. if i take an airplane, it's generally for a LONG trip to another country (although there are exceptions). summary: i'm NOT good at packing 4 days of stuff into one carry-on. i feel lonely without at least 6 books with me and unprepared that i can't have an extra layer of clothes in the trunk of my car "just in case"... i'll get over it.
i should have sooo been asleep hours ago... oops.
back monday -- a fantastic weekend to all y'all!
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
people are... fun
i think that i, a lowly TA, have inadvertently instigated an email war amongst all this semester's calc 3 profs. how much talent does that take?
oi...
oi...
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
be nice to your TAs....
3 sections, 3 times going over the exact same material and announcements, 3 totally different responses.
3rd section was quiet, just like last week, but a little more interactive. their response was somewhat of a non-reaction.
2nd section was in fairly good spirits. the student who stayed longest at my review session the weekend before the most recent exam got her paper back, was really excited about the grade, and immediately went to whisper in my ear something along the lines of "you're the best TA ever! you're so helpful! i can't believe i got such a good grade this time, thank you thank you thank you for everything!" that made me smile. another student in that section commented inbetween homework problems "what are you teaching next semester? you actually make math fun!"
1st section was fairly standard. giving back tests in there was actually kinda fun since there were a few students who scored *significantly* higher on this exam than last one. (i'm talking like a 30 point difference in grades or more) and it was rewarding to see their reactions to getting back good papers. they've been working hard and it's fun to see their expression when they realize how much it's paid off. however, one student in that section got just about the same grade as last exam. not a bad grade, but not what he wants for an average either. when he got his paper back at the end of class he yelled in the corner of the room for a few minutes then came and showed me one problem and asked "what on earth was he thinking to take of 3 points here?", to which i responded "not HE, *i* graded that one, and here's why you lost points. your answer was on the right track but missing some details. you still got most credit for the problem." he stood there and hollered at me/argued with me for a few minutes before leaving, still noticably upset.
i can understand being frustrated. i can understand wanting to know why points were assigned as they were, etc. it just frustrates me that a student would approach those questions by taking their frustrations out on me. it's not like i take off points just for fun. i grade consistently over 75ish exams and don't assign things arbitrarily.
unlike professors,
(1) TAs are not just dealing with lots of students, we're also in our own "end of semester crunch time" with our own grad classes. so we have similar homework stresses to the undergrads with our own work, PLUS have to field the questions of dozens of other students. don't get me wrong: i love teaching students. but end of the semester, lots of frustrated students trying to figure out how to get the grade they want, lots going on right before finals, crunch time is stressful on all of us.
(2) TAs have to grade a lot more of the students' work than profs. this means that (a) students should know what i'm looking for in a complete answer perfectly well by now, and (b) it's not just my own work and teaching -- this is another couple hours a week pulling on my time, and i take it seriously. -- yelling at me and telling me i was unfair honestly does offend me. it's not just an arbitrary mark of red pen... it's hours of work and thinking about how to most fairly assign credit.
some students are very careful to let profs/TAs know they appreciate their help. but ones who take the time to be loud and imply that i take points of arbitrarily and am just being stubborn or mean frustrate me. i'm tired. i'm ready for summer break too. but i've been trying to put 110% into my students all semester. i don't care if they all like me or not. that's impossible to expect or predict, and it's nice when we do get along well, but that's not the point. i DO care (1) that they realize i've tried to be a consistent grader throughout the course and (2) that they feel that i'm approachable for questions. people who attack me on either of those counts give me a headache.
end of rambling rant.
3rd section was quiet, just like last week, but a little more interactive. their response was somewhat of a non-reaction.
2nd section was in fairly good spirits. the student who stayed longest at my review session the weekend before the most recent exam got her paper back, was really excited about the grade, and immediately went to whisper in my ear something along the lines of "you're the best TA ever! you're so helpful! i can't believe i got such a good grade this time, thank you thank you thank you for everything!" that made me smile. another student in that section commented inbetween homework problems "what are you teaching next semester? you actually make math fun!"
1st section was fairly standard. giving back tests in there was actually kinda fun since there were a few students who scored *significantly* higher on this exam than last one. (i'm talking like a 30 point difference in grades or more) and it was rewarding to see their reactions to getting back good papers. they've been working hard and it's fun to see their expression when they realize how much it's paid off. however, one student in that section got just about the same grade as last exam. not a bad grade, but not what he wants for an average either. when he got his paper back at the end of class he yelled in the corner of the room for a few minutes then came and showed me one problem and asked "what on earth was he thinking to take of 3 points here?", to which i responded "not HE, *i* graded that one, and here's why you lost points. your answer was on the right track but missing some details. you still got most credit for the problem." he stood there and hollered at me/argued with me for a few minutes before leaving, still noticably upset.
i can understand being frustrated. i can understand wanting to know why points were assigned as they were, etc. it just frustrates me that a student would approach those questions by taking their frustrations out on me. it's not like i take off points just for fun. i grade consistently over 75ish exams and don't assign things arbitrarily.
unlike professors,
(1) TAs are not just dealing with lots of students, we're also in our own "end of semester crunch time" with our own grad classes. so we have similar homework stresses to the undergrads with our own work, PLUS have to field the questions of dozens of other students. don't get me wrong: i love teaching students. but end of the semester, lots of frustrated students trying to figure out how to get the grade they want, lots going on right before finals, crunch time is stressful on all of us.
(2) TAs have to grade a lot more of the students' work than profs. this means that (a) students should know what i'm looking for in a complete answer perfectly well by now, and (b) it's not just my own work and teaching -- this is another couple hours a week pulling on my time, and i take it seriously. -- yelling at me and telling me i was unfair honestly does offend me. it's not just an arbitrary mark of red pen... it's hours of work and thinking about how to most fairly assign credit.
some students are very careful to let profs/TAs know they appreciate their help. but ones who take the time to be loud and imply that i take points of arbitrarily and am just being stubborn or mean frustrate me. i'm tired. i'm ready for summer break too. but i've been trying to put 110% into my students all semester. i don't care if they all like me or not. that's impossible to expect or predict, and it's nice when we do get along well, but that's not the point. i DO care (1) that they realize i've tried to be a consistent grader throughout the course and (2) that they feel that i'm approachable for questions. people who attack me on either of those counts give me a headache.
end of rambling rant.
Sunday, April 16, 2006
Happy Easter!
He is risen indeed! Alleluia!!!!!
Easter has always been my favorite holiday, even when I was tons younger... That's right: not my birthday or Christmas for presents, not Halloween for candy. From little on, Easter was tops... not even for the candy and bunnies that go with it in the secular version of the day -- there's always been something horribly exciting from little on about walking into church earlier than normal, the church being PACKED and full of lilies, and really happy music, and even better than all of that getting excited about *why* everything is covered in white and flowers and we're singing such happy things: Jesus was totally dead (hence the singing in the dark and pondering the cross on Friday night), but he's ALIVE and RISEN. There's absolutely nothing cooler in this world than Christ overcoming death and sin and the grave and all the things that go with it.
For as many times as I wonder if I've become too overanalytical to have the wonder of a kid anymore, (and for many things I know I have), Easter's one day that I *still* wake up giddy, with my first thought "Jesus is Risen!" and it sticks with me throughout the day. :). Easter's the one thing I hope I never lose the joy of.
at any rate: to all y'all:
JESUS IS RISEN!!!!!!! ALLELUIA!!!!!!!!!!!!
may you all have a joy-filled easter too :)
Easter has always been my favorite holiday, even when I was tons younger... That's right: not my birthday or Christmas for presents, not Halloween for candy. From little on, Easter was tops... not even for the candy and bunnies that go with it in the secular version of the day -- there's always been something horribly exciting from little on about walking into church earlier than normal, the church being PACKED and full of lilies, and really happy music, and even better than all of that getting excited about *why* everything is covered in white and flowers and we're singing such happy things: Jesus was totally dead (hence the singing in the dark and pondering the cross on Friday night), but he's ALIVE and RISEN. There's absolutely nothing cooler in this world than Christ overcoming death and sin and the grave and all the things that go with it.
For as many times as I wonder if I've become too overanalytical to have the wonder of a kid anymore, (and for many things I know I have), Easter's one day that I *still* wake up giddy, with my first thought "Jesus is Risen!" and it sticks with me throughout the day. :). Easter's the one thing I hope I never lose the joy of.
at any rate: to all y'all:
JESUS IS RISEN!!!!!!! ALLELUIA!!!!!!!!!!!!
may you all have a joy-filled easter too :)
Saturday, April 15, 2006
so maybe that's the trick...
background: i pride myself on being *not* a "cheap drunk". i like the taste of all kinds of alcohol... a LOT, but i also like knowing when to stop before my interaction with the world at large becomes impaired.
i also used to have a record for being able to drink insane amounts of vodka without being light-headed or tipsy in the least.
on the roadtrip last month with scott, we had beer, whiskey, and brandy at various points in the trip, the latter two of which i really liked (czech beer is much better than american beer...), but drank to no effect.
but today, scott and i discovered the one kind of hard liquor that gets to me in no time... half a glass of gin and i instantly went from coherency to transposing words throughout dinner,... (which was burgers at scott's house.... after studying at a new park most of the afternoon, we decided that the best way to get home was to turn on any street that had a funny name... when we inevitably got lost, rather than asking for directions we stopped at a grocery store and bought a lot of ground beef to grill into burgers whenever we found his house again... total sense, right? this is how hanging out just me and scott goes... it's never normal, which is why we both enjoy it. :P)
conclusion: apparently gin is the trick.
that's good to know for future reference, right?
i also used to have a record for being able to drink insane amounts of vodka without being light-headed or tipsy in the least.
on the roadtrip last month with scott, we had beer, whiskey, and brandy at various points in the trip, the latter two of which i really liked (czech beer is much better than american beer...), but drank to no effect.
but today, scott and i discovered the one kind of hard liquor that gets to me in no time... half a glass of gin and i instantly went from coherency to transposing words throughout dinner,... (which was burgers at scott's house.... after studying at a new park most of the afternoon, we decided that the best way to get home was to turn on any street that had a funny name... when we inevitably got lost, rather than asking for directions we stopped at a grocery store and bought a lot of ground beef to grill into burgers whenever we found his house again... total sense, right? this is how hanging out just me and scott goes... it's never normal, which is why we both enjoy it. :P)
conclusion: apparently gin is the trick.
that's good to know for future reference, right?
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
a small rant
margie sent me this quote a couple of weeks ago:
No matter how good teaching may be, each student must take the responsibility
for his own education. ~ John Carolus S.J.
at the time i read it focusing on the first part and posted accordingly. that i'm putting in my all to try to be a clear TA for my students, and that's what i have control over. i can try to be creative to reach them, continue to strive to be clear, but i can't always take it personally when they don't do well.
today though, it's the other side of the coin that's bothering me. "each student must take RESPONSIBILITY for his own education."
i've been grading midterms all week. there are generally three categories
(1) students who do well on weekly quizzes/homework, and are doing well on the exam
(2) students who do poorly on weekly quizzes/homework, and still do poorly on the exam
(3) students who do well on weekly quizzes/homework, and are doing poorly on the exam.
category (1) is good. generally these students ask questions and participate well. they care, and they're trying, and they're fun to interact with. they're getting the grades that both they and i wish everyone would get, and they're generally helpful to their other classmates... not a problem.
category (2) has me frustrated for one reason and category (3) has me frustrated for another.
often, (not always, but often), students in category (2) tend to sit in the back, or not come to class at all, avoid interaction with you, etc. they occasionally ask questions, but not often (there are many venues outside of the classroom to do so if they're shy, i totally get that). i've tried to make myself as approachable as possible for questions, and i get the feeling that students generally perceive me as such... the thing that bothers me here is that repeatedly i've heard (some) students in this category express shock when they get their grades back. it's as if they think they should get "effort points" and they deserve to pass because they're paying tuition... if they can't pass then it's the fault of the course and/or professor somehow. yes, there are hard classes, BUT really, even if i'm nice and give partial credit, i can't reward telling complete lies on quizzes and exams. it's MY responsibility to make sure their grade means something so that they (a) don't get to harder classes unprepared, or (b) get to the job market as an engineer/business person/whatever they choose to do who can't do basic algebra or clearly express themselves on technical things. for that reason, i wish there were more acceptance of responsibility.
yes, students pay educational institutions for an education and should expect good teachers. but educational institutions are also responsible for what the diplomas they hand out mean. just because a student pays tuition and comes to class does not ENTITLE them to a passing grade.
students in category (3) frustrate me for a different reason, which has more to do with me than with them. frequent interactions with them, and their week to week work, and the kinds of questions they ask convince me that they're paying attention and the right ideas are in their head... that they're capable of doing the work... but their exam answers say otherwise. it's like they freeze for the large cumulative work, even if they're paying attention and working hard in general.
i honestly don't know how to help these students get over that and i wish i did. they're working hard and showing effort. their weekly work speaks well of them, but i don't know how to make that translate to exams.
case in point: there's a student from a different professor's section who i've been tutoring for a month and a half. after working intensely with me twice a week all that time, this student had a midterm within the past week and came to our meeting today commenting "so, i've been wasting your time", and showed me a midterm grade exactly the same as last exam, and not a happy one. we sat down and i asked him about the exam questions one by one, and with only one exception, he told me exactly what he should have done next. most of the points he lost were not from telling false things but from leaving entire problems blank that i've seen him ace in the past. both he and i KNOW he knows the stuff... we just don't know why it doesn't come out on the paper during timed exams...
summary:
(1) it bothers me when students don't take responsibility for their own bad grades and feel they're entitled to points for being there
(2) it bothers me even more (since i feel like there should be more i can do about it... unlike the first point) when students who i firmly believe know what's going on and see working hard freeze on exams, and i really wish i could find a way to encourage them to shine in that venue too.
done venting... several more hours of grading to go.
thoughts?
No matter how good teaching may be, each student must take the responsibility
for his own education. ~ John Carolus S.J.
at the time i read it focusing on the first part and posted accordingly. that i'm putting in my all to try to be a clear TA for my students, and that's what i have control over. i can try to be creative to reach them, continue to strive to be clear, but i can't always take it personally when they don't do well.
today though, it's the other side of the coin that's bothering me. "each student must take RESPONSIBILITY for his own education."
i've been grading midterms all week. there are generally three categories
(1) students who do well on weekly quizzes/homework, and are doing well on the exam
(2) students who do poorly on weekly quizzes/homework, and still do poorly on the exam
(3) students who do well on weekly quizzes/homework, and are doing poorly on the exam.
category (1) is good. generally these students ask questions and participate well. they care, and they're trying, and they're fun to interact with. they're getting the grades that both they and i wish everyone would get, and they're generally helpful to their other classmates... not a problem.
category (2) has me frustrated for one reason and category (3) has me frustrated for another.
often, (not always, but often), students in category (2) tend to sit in the back, or not come to class at all, avoid interaction with you, etc. they occasionally ask questions, but not often (there are many venues outside of the classroom to do so if they're shy, i totally get that). i've tried to make myself as approachable as possible for questions, and i get the feeling that students generally perceive me as such... the thing that bothers me here is that repeatedly i've heard (some) students in this category express shock when they get their grades back. it's as if they think they should get "effort points" and they deserve to pass because they're paying tuition... if they can't pass then it's the fault of the course and/or professor somehow. yes, there are hard classes, BUT really, even if i'm nice and give partial credit, i can't reward telling complete lies on quizzes and exams. it's MY responsibility to make sure their grade means something so that they (a) don't get to harder classes unprepared, or (b) get to the job market as an engineer/business person/whatever they choose to do who can't do basic algebra or clearly express themselves on technical things. for that reason, i wish there were more acceptance of responsibility.
yes, students pay educational institutions for an education and should expect good teachers. but educational institutions are also responsible for what the diplomas they hand out mean. just because a student pays tuition and comes to class does not ENTITLE them to a passing grade.
students in category (3) frustrate me for a different reason, which has more to do with me than with them. frequent interactions with them, and their week to week work, and the kinds of questions they ask convince me that they're paying attention and the right ideas are in their head... that they're capable of doing the work... but their exam answers say otherwise. it's like they freeze for the large cumulative work, even if they're paying attention and working hard in general.
i honestly don't know how to help these students get over that and i wish i did. they're working hard and showing effort. their weekly work speaks well of them, but i don't know how to make that translate to exams.
case in point: there's a student from a different professor's section who i've been tutoring for a month and a half. after working intensely with me twice a week all that time, this student had a midterm within the past week and came to our meeting today commenting "so, i've been wasting your time", and showed me a midterm grade exactly the same as last exam, and not a happy one. we sat down and i asked him about the exam questions one by one, and with only one exception, he told me exactly what he should have done next. most of the points he lost were not from telling false things but from leaving entire problems blank that i've seen him ace in the past. both he and i KNOW he knows the stuff... we just don't know why it doesn't come out on the paper during timed exams...
summary:
(1) it bothers me when students don't take responsibility for their own bad grades and feel they're entitled to points for being there
(2) it bothers me even more (since i feel like there should be more i can do about it... unlike the first point) when students who i firmly believe know what's going on and see working hard freeze on exams, and i really wish i could find a way to encourage them to shine in that venue too.
done venting... several more hours of grading to go.
thoughts?
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
it's been a loooong day...
... but at least this email made me laugh
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lara i know that you said that the exams won't be ready until next week
but did u grade mine yet???? Just kidding, i figured one of us section 02
people had to harass you about it.
Thanks for everything during the semester
Your favorite section
02
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lara i know that you said that the exams won't be ready until next week
but did u grade mine yet???? Just kidding, i figured one of us section 02
people had to harass you about it.
Thanks for everything during the semester
Your favorite section
02
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
the (non) joy of teaching
oi... what a day.
3 class periods, every single one completely different.
period 1: 8:40-10:00... fairly standard. they answered my questions. they paid attention, they worked. we got stuff done, but nothing out of the ordinary
period 2: 10:20-11:40... the time flew. we laughed, we got equally much done to first hour, we laughed some more... it was a good time.
quote:
me: so if F is a vector field and we can write it as the gradient of f, then fill in the blanks... we say F is....
several students: conservative
me: awesome... and we say little f is a what kind of function for F?
several students: (laughingly) liberal!
me: well, that, but what's the math word?
(answer: potential, but that's beside the point.
period 3: 12:00-1:20... don't get me wrong... i'm not one to complain, BUT... every 5 minutes they asked me if i could stop lecturing and just let them go early. when they weren't asking that they sat there and just glared at me.... normally they're quiet, but they usually don't have so strong of a negative vibe. one of them came to my office hours later in the afternoon to turn something in, and on his way out, he came back and said "wait, i do have one question for you"
me: "what's that?"
student: "why was everyone giving you so much crap today?"
me: "not a clue, i was wondering that too... no matter what i did, you all looked unhappy to even think about participating... did i do something different that i'm unaware of?"
student: "no... i was just wondering if something happened before class that i didn't know about... it was weird"
me: "well, there's always next week. hopefully it'll be back to normal!"
student: "yeah, i hope so. we shouldn't be mean to you."
even the students picked up on it... i have no idea what was going on, but that section drained me... if i could have reversed sections 2 and 3 today it would have done wonders for my mood.
for the first time ever since i got it in like august, my pedometer battery is dead, so i don't know how many steps i've gone today... off to fix that, back eventually.
3 class periods, every single one completely different.
period 1: 8:40-10:00... fairly standard. they answered my questions. they paid attention, they worked. we got stuff done, but nothing out of the ordinary
period 2: 10:20-11:40... the time flew. we laughed, we got equally much done to first hour, we laughed some more... it was a good time.
quote:
me: so if F is a vector field and we can write it as the gradient of f, then fill in the blanks... we say F is....
several students: conservative
me: awesome... and we say little f is a what kind of function for F?
several students: (laughingly) liberal!
me: well, that, but what's the math word?
(answer: potential, but that's beside the point.
period 3: 12:00-1:20... don't get me wrong... i'm not one to complain, BUT... every 5 minutes they asked me if i could stop lecturing and just let them go early. when they weren't asking that they sat there and just glared at me.... normally they're quiet, but they usually don't have so strong of a negative vibe. one of them came to my office hours later in the afternoon to turn something in, and on his way out, he came back and said "wait, i do have one question for you"
me: "what's that?"
student: "why was everyone giving you so much crap today?"
me: "not a clue, i was wondering that too... no matter what i did, you all looked unhappy to even think about participating... did i do something different that i'm unaware of?"
student: "no... i was just wondering if something happened before class that i didn't know about... it was weird"
me: "well, there's always next week. hopefully it'll be back to normal!"
student: "yeah, i hope so. we shouldn't be mean to you."
even the students picked up on it... i have no idea what was going on, but that section drained me... if i could have reversed sections 2 and 3 today it would have done wonders for my mood.
for the first time ever since i got it in like august, my pedometer battery is dead, so i don't know how many steps i've gone today... off to fix that, back eventually.
Friday, April 07, 2006
happiness!
rewind 2 months... february 16 i passed my oral qualifying exam, and then had 6 days to complete a detailed application for a fellowship i hoped to receive for next year... they said they would announce the national winners on may 1st, so i've been patiently waiting and wondering.... i have a history of applying for big national scholarship type things and getting "honorable mention" but never winning.
when today, april 7, (i.e. 3 weeks before the announcement of winners date), i had a letter from the fellowship organization, i totally expected it to say "sorry, but you've been eliminated, thanks for trying".)... instead, i opened an envelope of this:
how yay is that?
out for a jog... back later
when today, april 7, (i.e. 3 weeks before the announcement of winners date), i had a letter from the fellowship organization, i totally expected it to say "sorry, but you've been eliminated, thanks for trying".)... instead, i opened an envelope of this:
how yay is that?
out for a jog... back later
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
abnormal, as usual
seriously, i don't think i can go a whole week in my second section without something strange happening...
this week?
i'm writing a problem on the board when all the sudden i notice a kid in the front row is making strange noises... i turn and look at him and realize he's giggling uncontrolably but trying to muffle the noise.
i stop what i'm doing and ask "dude, are you ok?"
to which he laughed out loud and said "yeah, i'm great, you and calculus are just so darn entertaining."
i totally don't get it.
go figure.
this week?
i'm writing a problem on the board when all the sudden i notice a kid in the front row is making strange noises... i turn and look at him and realize he's giggling uncontrolably but trying to muffle the noise.
i stop what i'm doing and ask "dude, are you ok?"
to which he laughed out loud and said "yeah, i'm great, you and calculus are just so darn entertaining."
i totally don't get it.
go figure.
Sunday, April 02, 2006
a day in the life...
... of a calc 3 TA's email inbox.
selected quotes:
> Hi Lara,
>
> Thankyou for the great office hours on Thursday, it really helped me to
> get the maple done, and it was nice to have everyone working as a big
> group.
>
> Just to clarify, the quiz is going to cover integrals in polar
> coordinates, triple integrals, Jacobians, and vector fields according to
> the last email you sent us. Is this the same as studying sections 15.7,
> 15.8, 15.9 and section 16.1? I just want to make sure that there isn't
> anything hiding in any other sections. Thankyou again for all of the
> great help and I'm looking forward to the quiz on Tuesday.
my reply:
> also make sure you're comfortable with 15.4 (this is the section on
> integrals on polar coordinates). Otherwise, your list below covers it.
>
> "looking forward to" is an interesting choice of words for a quiz...
>
> See you tuesday.
>
> Lara
at the end of the next email from the same student:
> P.S. I always look forward to your quizzes, they are normally fun in a
> wierd math kinda way. Besides they are only 20 mins. long and you normally
> give a good idea of what is going to be on it by the problems that you
> pick.
from a completely different student:
> Lara
>
> Thank you very much for your well thought out and time consuming answer! This is
> such a big help!
> Thank you!
and my personal favorite:
> Lara,
>
> you're god!
> thank you~
selected quotes:
> Hi Lara,
>
> Thankyou for the great office hours on Thursday, it really helped me to
> get the maple done, and it was nice to have everyone working as a big
> group.
>
> Just to clarify, the quiz is going to cover integrals in polar
> coordinates, triple integrals, Jacobians, and vector fields according to
> the last email you sent us. Is this the same as studying sections 15.7,
> 15.8, 15.9 and section 16.1? I just want to make sure that there isn't
> anything hiding in any other sections. Thankyou again for all of the
> great help and I'm looking forward to the quiz on Tuesday.
my reply:
> also make sure you're comfortable with 15.4 (this is the section on
> integrals on polar coordinates). Otherwise, your list below covers it.
>
> "looking forward to" is an interesting choice of words for a quiz...
>
> See you tuesday.
>
> Lara
at the end of the next email from the same student:
> P.S. I always look forward to your quizzes, they are normally fun in a
> wierd math kinda way. Besides they are only 20 mins. long and you normally
> give a good idea of what is going to be on it by the problems that you
> pick.
from a completely different student:
> Lara
>
> Thank you very much for your well thought out and time consuming answer! This is
> such a big help!
> Thank you!
and my personal favorite:
> Lara,
>
> you're god!
> thank you~
Saturday, April 01, 2006
you have *got* to be kidding me
lately, i've gotten the sense that the chemicals in my body are completely out of wack.
i attribute this to the fact that my shape/weight has changed drastically in the past year, and figure that once i stay consistently at a good size, things will balance out again.
but here's the latest in that saga.
went to the eye doctor today. my eyes still see as well as they did before, so same prescription.
but apparently, when you blink, your eyes get covered with a layer of tears. for most people it takes 12-15 seconds before this layer starts to break down. the eye doctor put dye in my eye and checked... for me, it's breaking down in 7-8 seconds, which means apparently my eyes aren't making the right consistency of tears right now to keep my eyes well-lubricated... hence why they've felt dry a lot lately.
his suggestions were
(1) "if you weren't a grad student and had more substantial health coverage, i'd prescribe $100/month eye drops to fix it", but
(2) "since you don't have that, we'll do the more cost-effective version: two kinds of over the counter drops, plus a new vitamin you should take to convince your body to make better tears"
how much fun is that?
apparently i'm temporarily broken... we'll see how long this lasts. :P
i attribute this to the fact that my shape/weight has changed drastically in the past year, and figure that once i stay consistently at a good size, things will balance out again.
but here's the latest in that saga.
went to the eye doctor today. my eyes still see as well as they did before, so same prescription.
but apparently, when you blink, your eyes get covered with a layer of tears. for most people it takes 12-15 seconds before this layer starts to break down. the eye doctor put dye in my eye and checked... for me, it's breaking down in 7-8 seconds, which means apparently my eyes aren't making the right consistency of tears right now to keep my eyes well-lubricated... hence why they've felt dry a lot lately.
his suggestions were
(1) "if you weren't a grad student and had more substantial health coverage, i'd prescribe $100/month eye drops to fix it", but
(2) "since you don't have that, we'll do the more cost-effective version: two kinds of over the counter drops, plus a new vitamin you should take to convince your body to make better tears"
how much fun is that?
apparently i'm temporarily broken... we'll see how long this lasts. :P
things that have amused me today
* Boy's pancake breakfast delayed the end of WWII
* Crafty Sea Lion Befuddles Fish Biologists
* my advisor's april fool's trick of the year:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Date: Sat, 1 Apr 2006 11:11:37 -0500 (EST)
Subject: Proof of Goldbach's Theorem
Dear friends and/or colleagues and/or students,
You may be interested to know that I have just succeeded in
proving Goldbach's Theorem.
The paper can be viewed/downloaded from
http://www.math.rutgers.edu/~zeilberg/goldbach.pdf
Best wishes
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
things that don't amuse me...
* i've been grading papers for the past 2 hours (because what else does one do on a saturday), and it's a workshop week. i'm supposed to grade their papers both on (a) mathematical correctness and (b) writing clarity... it's part (b) that's screwy. i'll easily give 8 and 9 out of 10s, but out of the 75 papers i graded on the first workshop i gave 0 10s, and on the 2nd one i gave 1 10 in all. many times there are mathematical errors that contribute, but there have been students who have all the right ideas, but don't express themselves clearly and i give 9s too.
in an attempt to get those rarely given 10s, students are writing in painstaking detail, but it's hard find papers that bridge the gap between (a) not explaining what you're doing and just doing computations and (b) explaining plenty, but in doing so writing with such formal and unnatural grammar that it's equally frustrating to read.
it's *really* hard to give good tips on how to explain technical things well in good prose.
* i have an eye doctor appointment this afternoon. last year he was concerned that my eyes seemed too dry and switched me to another kind of contacts... i didn't think they were dry then, but now i know my eyes definitely are way dryer than they should be even with the new contacts and only leaving them in 8-9 hours a day... crossing my fingers that he doesn't get so worried as to tell me he won't renew my contacts prescription and will only let me have glasses... we'll see.
* Crafty Sea Lion Befuddles Fish Biologists
* my advisor's april fool's trick of the year:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Date: Sat, 1 Apr 2006 11:11:37 -0500 (EST)
Subject: Proof of Goldbach's Theorem
Dear friends and/or colleagues and/or students,
You may be interested to know that I have just succeeded in
proving Goldbach's Theorem.
The paper can be viewed/downloaded from
http://www.math.rutgers.edu/~zeilberg/goldbach.pdf
Best wishes
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
things that don't amuse me...
* i've been grading papers for the past 2 hours (because what else does one do on a saturday), and it's a workshop week. i'm supposed to grade their papers both on (a) mathematical correctness and (b) writing clarity... it's part (b) that's screwy. i'll easily give 8 and 9 out of 10s, but out of the 75 papers i graded on the first workshop i gave 0 10s, and on the 2nd one i gave 1 10 in all. many times there are mathematical errors that contribute, but there have been students who have all the right ideas, but don't express themselves clearly and i give 9s too.
in an attempt to get those rarely given 10s, students are writing in painstaking detail, but it's hard find papers that bridge the gap between (a) not explaining what you're doing and just doing computations and (b) explaining plenty, but in doing so writing with such formal and unnatural grammar that it's equally frustrating to read.
it's *really* hard to give good tips on how to explain technical things well in good prose.
* i have an eye doctor appointment this afternoon. last year he was concerned that my eyes seemed too dry and switched me to another kind of contacts... i didn't think they were dry then, but now i know my eyes definitely are way dryer than they should be even with the new contacts and only leaving them in 8-9 hours a day... crossing my fingers that he doesn't get so worried as to tell me he won't renew my contacts prescription and will only let me have glasses... we'll see.
gotta love it....
(one of these is way more sarcastic than the others, can you tell which? :P)
* i have my first rate my professors.com rating ever... i wonder if students realize that profs check the site too... really, not just grad students; i know actual professors who have their rating page bookmarked and check it every month or two. :P
* aek and me are officially funded to go to GSCC06 next month. our plane tickets are paid for by the university, and we're going to stay with aek's undergrad roommate... since we bought tickets late and flying on monday instead of sunday made a large difference, we have a whole day at the end to kill just hanging out... whether i hang out with aek and his old friends, or track down old budapest friends in madison is TBA (hopefully some of both), but it should be a good weekend.
* i gave leigh a blurb yesterday morning that since colleen was already gone to MN and leigh was leaving for canada for the weekend, i'd be sad and lonely all weekend... while i was out on campus all day yesterday, she left me a bag of craisins trail mix to keep me company. leigh is fantastic.
* i managed to keep myself up til 2am last night, and had the sheer pleasure of being woken up before 9... i'm home alone, didn't set any alarm clocks, and the phone was turned off, so how does that happen? my landlord decided to ring the bell every 5 minutes until he got an answer starting at 8:45AM... when i came downstairs on the 3rd attempt, he seemed surprised to see me in PJs with my glasses on, and looking like i had just rolled out of bed (i had... i needed to make the bell STOP). he had come over to be a little friendlier about the lecture we got last tuesday about the furnace bill... but timing... could have been a little later. at least he's in a moderately better mood about it.
today's agenda?
* i never quite got around to grading workshops yesterday, so post-breakfast, it's scrubs season one DVD (i practically have both season one and season two memorized... it's a good thing season three comes out soon) and grading fiesta until i get that done with...
* my own homework
* 5 miles (it's a beautiful weekend, how can i *not* make sure i get my walk/jogging in every day)
* groceries
i plan ever so much weekend fun, don't i?
later dudes.
* i have my first rate my professors.com rating ever... i wonder if students realize that profs check the site too... really, not just grad students; i know actual professors who have their rating page bookmarked and check it every month or two. :P
* aek and me are officially funded to go to GSCC06 next month. our plane tickets are paid for by the university, and we're going to stay with aek's undergrad roommate... since we bought tickets late and flying on monday instead of sunday made a large difference, we have a whole day at the end to kill just hanging out... whether i hang out with aek and his old friends, or track down old budapest friends in madison is TBA (hopefully some of both), but it should be a good weekend.
* i gave leigh a blurb yesterday morning that since colleen was already gone to MN and leigh was leaving for canada for the weekend, i'd be sad and lonely all weekend... while i was out on campus all day yesterday, she left me a bag of craisins trail mix to keep me company. leigh is fantastic.
* i managed to keep myself up til 2am last night, and had the sheer pleasure of being woken up before 9... i'm home alone, didn't set any alarm clocks, and the phone was turned off, so how does that happen? my landlord decided to ring the bell every 5 minutes until he got an answer starting at 8:45AM... when i came downstairs on the 3rd attempt, he seemed surprised to see me in PJs with my glasses on, and looking like i had just rolled out of bed (i had... i needed to make the bell STOP). he had come over to be a little friendlier about the lecture we got last tuesday about the furnace bill... but timing... could have been a little later. at least he's in a moderately better mood about it.
today's agenda?
* i never quite got around to grading workshops yesterday, so post-breakfast, it's scrubs season one DVD (i practically have both season one and season two memorized... it's a good thing season three comes out soon) and grading fiesta until i get that done with...
* my own homework
* 5 miles (it's a beautiful weekend, how can i *not* make sure i get my walk/jogging in every day)
* groceries
i plan ever so much weekend fun, don't i?
later dudes.
Friday, March 31, 2006
typical...
at the start of the semester, fridays were my "day off"... now, check this out:
on the agenda today...
* breakfast
* tutor
* finish editing the paper i agreed to referee two months ago
* pizza seminar
* extra office hours
* book seminar rooms for the REU this summer
* figure out which math department secretaries i need to get to be friends with to get a free plane ticket to madison next month
* grade 76 calc 3 workshops
* write a quiz for my students for next week
* walk/jog 5 miles
* dinner
what does it say that this has become my "typical" day?
besides that, colleen is home in minnesota for the weekend, and leigh is going on a roadtrip to canada with sam, john, and paul, so starting in about 6 hours i'm home alone for the weekend.
with eric having a girlfriend and being really into the computer program he's been trying to write for awhile, and ben in delaware as usual, this means the only prospect of social interaction this weekend is church.
i did just leave out one of the usual suspects: scott and i did pinky swear last sunday that our sunday afternoon plans from here on out should be to study at panera for half the afternoon once i get back from church each week, but that's more math.
seriously, i'm a math machine and that's about it. (not complaining, just describing). apparently telling calculus jokes to students during office hours is my version of having fun.
heh.
the end.
on the agenda today...
* breakfast
* tutor
* finish editing the paper i agreed to referee two months ago
* pizza seminar
* extra office hours
* book seminar rooms for the REU this summer
* figure out which math department secretaries i need to get to be friends with to get a free plane ticket to madison next month
* grade 76 calc 3 workshops
* write a quiz for my students for next week
* walk/jog 5 miles
* dinner
what does it say that this has become my "typical" day?
besides that, colleen is home in minnesota for the weekend, and leigh is going on a roadtrip to canada with sam, john, and paul, so starting in about 6 hours i'm home alone for the weekend.
with eric having a girlfriend and being really into the computer program he's been trying to write for awhile, and ben in delaware as usual, this means the only prospect of social interaction this weekend is church.
i did just leave out one of the usual suspects: scott and i did pinky swear last sunday that our sunday afternoon plans from here on out should be to study at panera for half the afternoon once i get back from church each week, but that's more math.
seriously, i'm a math machine and that's about it. (not complaining, just describing). apparently telling calculus jokes to students during office hours is my version of having fun.
heh.
the end.
Thursday, March 30, 2006
go figure..
i can't believe this is in yahoo's top 4 headlines of the day this morning:
Crazy Cat Terrorizes Connecticut Town
on the other hand this:
Photos: Eclipse Wows the World
and
Thousands Gather in Temple for Eclipse
were fairly awesome yesterday. Especially on the 2nd story, check out the slideshow on the left hand side.
yay cool astronomy stuff. go figure with crazy cats.
i called my mom last night to discuss tax stuff. apparently the new news at home is that they got a new dog named grace (nestle, the old dog, is insanely jealous), and that dad's getting put to sleep to have tooth surgery done this afternoon. we'll see how this goes.
high of 68 today and 71 tomorrow -- i'd say spring is officially here! :P
happy thursday?
Crazy Cat Terrorizes Connecticut Town
on the other hand this:
Photos: Eclipse Wows the World
and
Thousands Gather in Temple for Eclipse
were fairly awesome yesterday. Especially on the 2nd story, check out the slideshow on the left hand side.
yay cool astronomy stuff. go figure with crazy cats.
i called my mom last night to discuss tax stuff. apparently the new news at home is that they got a new dog named grace (nestle, the old dog, is insanely jealous), and that dad's getting put to sleep to have tooth surgery done this afternoon. we'll see how this goes.
high of 68 today and 71 tomorrow -- i'd say spring is officially here! :P
happy thursday?
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
oi...
the facts:
* two weeks ago sunday we had no hot water and it was 40 freakin degrees outside, hence no warm showers and freezing cold house.
* we tried to reset the water heater three times that morning but it kept shutting off.
* next step: call the landlord. colleen tried and got no answering machine, so we were out of luck for that
* next step: call the oil company to fix it. leigh called them and told them to come out and fix the darn heater.
* we never heard from the oil company that they did anything, but we had hot water later that day.
* just now, our landlord appeared at our front door all irritated. he just got a $150 bill for the service call, and said that we're not allowed to authorize service calls to the furnace without his permission. he wanted to know why he wasn't informed and why we couldn't have waited all day til monday. while he was chewing me out (since i answered the door), i ran off and got colleen (i made none of the calls... i was headed out for my maine trip with scott. colleen on the other hand could first-hand vouch that we actually tried to call him before we called for maintenance), and she at least calmed him down enough to go home and take care of it, rather than continuing to lecture us.
oh to not be a renter someday... in some ways it's nice... as if i could afford a real place and time/funds to do maintenance, but days like this, or when he makes it all the way to my room and chews me out for how much i have on the walls... oi...
the end.
* two weeks ago sunday we had no hot water and it was 40 freakin degrees outside, hence no warm showers and freezing cold house.
* we tried to reset the water heater three times that morning but it kept shutting off.
* next step: call the landlord. colleen tried and got no answering machine, so we were out of luck for that
* next step: call the oil company to fix it. leigh called them and told them to come out and fix the darn heater.
* we never heard from the oil company that they did anything, but we had hot water later that day.
* just now, our landlord appeared at our front door all irritated. he just got a $150 bill for the service call, and said that we're not allowed to authorize service calls to the furnace without his permission. he wanted to know why he wasn't informed and why we couldn't have waited all day til monday. while he was chewing me out (since i answered the door), i ran off and got colleen (i made none of the calls... i was headed out for my maine trip with scott. colleen on the other hand could first-hand vouch that we actually tried to call him before we called for maintenance), and she at least calmed him down enough to go home and take care of it, rather than continuing to lecture us.
oh to not be a renter someday... in some ways it's nice... as if i could afford a real place and time/funds to do maintenance, but days like this, or when he makes it all the way to my room and chews me out for how much i have on the walls... oi...
the end.
Monday, March 27, 2006
dude, i've finally been sucked in...
... to the craziness that is myspace.
my brother's been yacking about it for months, but i figured, i'm on facebook, i have a blog (and i like it not just being out there for anyone who knows my name, so i'm fine with not having a myspace blog), but curiousity and other such reasons got the best of me today. (namely, there are friends and family who aren't on facebook because they didn't go to college or just because they prefer myspace, so myspace is a less "selective" networking space with more personalization options... or whatever that means).
summary: as of today, i'm on myspace too (click here for my profile), and if you're on myspace and i didn't manage to track down your profile, then you should add me as your friend. ;-P (and if you're not on myspace and were somehow inspired by this bizarre post, make sure to add me as your friend too :P)
the end.
my brother's been yacking about it for months, but i figured, i'm on facebook, i have a blog (and i like it not just being out there for anyone who knows my name, so i'm fine with not having a myspace blog), but curiousity and other such reasons got the best of me today. (namely, there are friends and family who aren't on facebook because they didn't go to college or just because they prefer myspace, so myspace is a less "selective" networking space with more personalization options... or whatever that means).
summary: as of today, i'm on myspace too (click here for my profile), and if you're on myspace and i didn't manage to track down your profile, then you should add me as your friend. ;-P (and if you're not on myspace and were somehow inspired by this bizarre post, make sure to add me as your friend too :P)
the end.
Sunday, March 26, 2006
all for the love... of a book
one of my favorite books on the planet is the hitchiker's guide to the galaxy i have the edition that has all 5 books of the "trilogy" in one volume, and while i've read it cover to cover several times, i'm all about lending it out to others to share the joy.
several rutgers people have borrowed the tome from me (with 5 books in one, it's several inches thick and hard to miss) over the past couple of years, and last i knew it had been living in scott's room for months.
anyhow, that's fine, until yesterday, when i asked scott if he still had it, and he didn't. he thought he remembered giving it to leigh.
so i asked leigh, and she thought she remembered me giving it to ben.
so i called ben, and he had no clue where it was, but it wasn't with him.
so as a last resort, i called eric, who didn't have it, but had another suggestion for me. he said he could have sworn he had seen it on hoon's shelf when walking down the hall recently.
hoon is one of eric, scott, and jared's current roommates. hoon is from korea, and his english is not the best. he also has some interesting living habits such that eric, scott, and jared are regularly confused by him. (and probably vice versa).
either way, at my request, eric went to visit hoon, and basically asked
"hey, that's a good book -- is it yours?"
hoon's response?
"no. what's it about? it's decoration. it came with the room."
eric told hoon was the book was about and checked the front cover (which had my name in it) and retrieved the book for me (hoon had no intention of reading it, otherwise he'd be welcome to too). seeing as it was in scott's room as recently as november/december, and hoon's explanation doesn't go any further than above, how it got from point a of scott's room downstairs to point b of hoon's room upstairs is a mystery.
nonetheless, yay eric for solving it. of all places, i would NOT in a million years have thought to check hoon's room for my book.
the end.
several rutgers people have borrowed the tome from me (with 5 books in one, it's several inches thick and hard to miss) over the past couple of years, and last i knew it had been living in scott's room for months.
anyhow, that's fine, until yesterday, when i asked scott if he still had it, and he didn't. he thought he remembered giving it to leigh.
so i asked leigh, and she thought she remembered me giving it to ben.
so i called ben, and he had no clue where it was, but it wasn't with him.
so as a last resort, i called eric, who didn't have it, but had another suggestion for me. he said he could have sworn he had seen it on hoon's shelf when walking down the hall recently.
hoon is one of eric, scott, and jared's current roommates. hoon is from korea, and his english is not the best. he also has some interesting living habits such that eric, scott, and jared are regularly confused by him. (and probably vice versa).
either way, at my request, eric went to visit hoon, and basically asked
"hey, that's a good book -- is it yours?"
hoon's response?
"no. what's it about? it's decoration. it came with the room."
eric told hoon was the book was about and checked the front cover (which had my name in it) and retrieved the book for me (hoon had no intention of reading it, otherwise he'd be welcome to too). seeing as it was in scott's room as recently as november/december, and hoon's explanation doesn't go any further than above, how it got from point a of scott's room downstairs to point b of hoon's room upstairs is a mystery.
nonetheless, yay eric for solving it. of all places, i would NOT in a million years have thought to check hoon's room for my book.
the end.
words of wisdom
passed along by margie:
No matter how good teaching may be, each student must take the responsibility for his own education. ~ John Carolus S.J.
No matter how good teaching may be, each student must take the responsibility for his own education. ~ John Carolus S.J.
oi
the maple grader for my classes gave one of my students a -1/20 on the most recent assignment. that's right -- by turning in the assignment, the student gets a 0 for the assignment, MINUS ONE MORE from the rest of his average. i hope the prof rounds that up to a 0. i don't think that the rest of a student's grade should go down for turning something in!, but it's not my decision.
we shall see....
we shall see....
Friday, March 24, 2006
people, people, people
i am exhausted. not just tired exhausted. like could stay up for hours, but don't want to interact with another human being in any way shape or form for awhile exhausted.
i've been running on low for quite some time, and tonight sealed it.
scott and me talked a lot on the road trip last week about how i should stop overanalyzing why i don't hang out with people outside of formal academic settings more than one at a time anymore, and just start acting on it. i agreed i have a tendency to overanalyze and that maybe i just need someone to "yell" at me nicely but seriously enough to convince me to get out of the house once in awhile. i resolved to at least try to get out a little more, and in the last week i've done moderately ok...
the night after we got back from our trip i had dinner with scott and eduardo (scott i see plenty, i don't think i've hung out with eduardo ever outside of the math building)
earlier this week i was going to do dinner with eric to talk about math, but scott and colleen joined, and i had a decent time with all 3 of them at once.
but last night, there was dinner for a prospective student and there were 8 of us in all, and i went into it in a decent mood but quickly became exhausted, quiet, and overwhelmed.
leigh passed her oral exam yesterday, and her requested celebration was for people to come bowling with her. it's been several years since i last went bowling, but leigh came out to dinner after i passed, so i figured i could at least try to show i cared back. eric and i drove to the alley together in his car, and as soon as we got there i started having a mini social anxiety attack. i understand it's all "in my head" or whatever, but i'm so good at being a hermit anymore, that that's still a huge jump and i'd prefer to be on my own reading or with just one friend chatting and not DO-ing anything. scott bought me a beer and i got over freaking out, but...
scott, ben, and eric took turns entertaining me throughout the evening. there was no one there i'm uncomfortable around (in fact it was *exactly* the list of people in the department i enjoy hanging out with one on one, minus like 2, plus a prospective), but while everyone else loosened up and was being silly and having a blast, i was rather inconspicuous and low key, wishing i wasn't around smoke and so much noise. scott and ben both gave me a bear hug after the last game and were like "YOU SURVIVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOOD JOB!!!!!", to which i started crying on scott's shoulder.
seriously, my people energy is at zero. even though colleen, leigh, and the prospective student staying at my house this weekend were coming back here, i caught a ride back home with eric again since he actually gets me when i'm in this wretched of a mood on account of people -- not anyone doing anything wrong -- people doing everything RIGHT, and i'm just overwhelmed.
usually i care plenty about people,... right now though, in general, i'm just exhausted and run ragged and really need the world to give me a break for a bit. i really have zero energy to input anything more from anyone. i don't know what that makes me, but....
yeah... exhausted.
i think i'm hiding from everything except math for the weekend. -- hope all of YOU have a good one.
i've been running on low for quite some time, and tonight sealed it.
scott and me talked a lot on the road trip last week about how i should stop overanalyzing why i don't hang out with people outside of formal academic settings more than one at a time anymore, and just start acting on it. i agreed i have a tendency to overanalyze and that maybe i just need someone to "yell" at me nicely but seriously enough to convince me to get out of the house once in awhile. i resolved to at least try to get out a little more, and in the last week i've done moderately ok...
the night after we got back from our trip i had dinner with scott and eduardo (scott i see plenty, i don't think i've hung out with eduardo ever outside of the math building)
earlier this week i was going to do dinner with eric to talk about math, but scott and colleen joined, and i had a decent time with all 3 of them at once.
but last night, there was dinner for a prospective student and there were 8 of us in all, and i went into it in a decent mood but quickly became exhausted, quiet, and overwhelmed.
leigh passed her oral exam yesterday, and her requested celebration was for people to come bowling with her. it's been several years since i last went bowling, but leigh came out to dinner after i passed, so i figured i could at least try to show i cared back. eric and i drove to the alley together in his car, and as soon as we got there i started having a mini social anxiety attack. i understand it's all "in my head" or whatever, but i'm so good at being a hermit anymore, that that's still a huge jump and i'd prefer to be on my own reading or with just one friend chatting and not DO-ing anything. scott bought me a beer and i got over freaking out, but...
scott, ben, and eric took turns entertaining me throughout the evening. there was no one there i'm uncomfortable around (in fact it was *exactly* the list of people in the department i enjoy hanging out with one on one, minus like 2, plus a prospective), but while everyone else loosened up and was being silly and having a blast, i was rather inconspicuous and low key, wishing i wasn't around smoke and so much noise. scott and ben both gave me a bear hug after the last game and were like "YOU SURVIVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOOD JOB!!!!!", to which i started crying on scott's shoulder.
seriously, my people energy is at zero. even though colleen, leigh, and the prospective student staying at my house this weekend were coming back here, i caught a ride back home with eric again since he actually gets me when i'm in this wretched of a mood on account of people -- not anyone doing anything wrong -- people doing everything RIGHT, and i'm just overwhelmed.
usually i care plenty about people,... right now though, in general, i'm just exhausted and run ragged and really need the world to give me a break for a bit. i really have zero energy to input anything more from anyone. i don't know what that makes me, but....
yeah... exhausted.
i think i'm hiding from everything except math for the weekend. -- hope all of YOU have a good one.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
earlier tonight...
ben, scott, and i are sitting at marble slab downing ice cream, after we served as the 3 person panel for the 1st year students to ask "how to be a good TA" questions of for an hour and a half. obviously i've seen scott plenty recently, but ben and i hadn't hung out in about a month... the THREE of us hadn't hung out all at once in about a year and a half... anywho, enough background... me, ben, scott, ice cream, happiness, when...
suddenly, scott goes on the following tangent:
scott: lara! i have the best story... i just have to tell you, but you're probably going to get mad and slug me.
me: why? what did you do?
scott: nothing
me: then why am i going to slug you?
scott: you just will... so you know shalin?
me: who?
scott: shalin... psych grad student... he knows everybody
me: except me... i have no clue who you're talking about
scott: ok, well, i ran into shalin this afternoon, and he asked me how my spring break was... i told him it was great... told him i went on a road trip with you. and of course since shalin knows everyone, he immediately started thinking... he was like lara? lara? do i know lara?
me: i have no clue who he is, so the answer is NO, right?
scott: no, actually after a minute he goes, "oh wait, she's the girl who wants to learn to dance?" isn't she?... he found it strange that that's the only fragment in his head about you and otherwise he knows nothing. i found it so strange that that's the only thing he had to say that i couldn't stop laughing my ass off for like 5 whole minutes.
me: (actually slugs scott)
scott: told you you'd hit me... i promise, it's not my doing... just thought you should know that somehow, parts of the universe just know you as "the girl who really wants to learn to dance" and that's it... you should try and live up to it.
what a weird day. the end.
suddenly, scott goes on the following tangent:
scott: lara! i have the best story... i just have to tell you, but you're probably going to get mad and slug me.
me: why? what did you do?
scott: nothing
me: then why am i going to slug you?
scott: you just will... so you know shalin?
me: who?
scott: shalin... psych grad student... he knows everybody
me: except me... i have no clue who you're talking about
scott: ok, well, i ran into shalin this afternoon, and he asked me how my spring break was... i told him it was great... told him i went on a road trip with you. and of course since shalin knows everyone, he immediately started thinking... he was like lara? lara? do i know lara?
me: i have no clue who he is, so the answer is NO, right?
scott: no, actually after a minute he goes, "oh wait, she's the girl who wants to learn to dance?" isn't she?... he found it strange that that's the only fragment in his head about you and otherwise he knows nothing. i found it so strange that that's the only thing he had to say that i couldn't stop laughing my ass off for like 5 whole minutes.
me: (actually slugs scott)
scott: told you you'd hit me... i promise, it's not my doing... just thought you should know that somehow, parts of the universe just know you as "the girl who really wants to learn to dance" and that's it... you should try and live up to it.
what a weird day. the end.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
misc
misc part 1:
still working my way through the one year bible... when i finish with my few pages each night i occasionally bug other people about it... tonight:
me: summary of bible reading tonight: moses gets mad about strange things
me: now, lara goes to sleep
dave: that happens a lot
me: moses or sleep?
dave: moses
dave: lara sleeping should happen a lot, too
me: reuben and gad said they wanted land on the other side of the jordan from canaan to raise sheep and moses spazzed for a page about it
me: it was entertaining
me: this is the lara translation of the bible
me: what do you think?
dave: it's certainly entertaining
me: you wouldn't buy a copy if i published it, would you?
dave: i'd take a free copy
me: thanks for the vote of confidence
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
misc part 2 (completely unrelated):
song lyrics stuck in my head today are as follows:
Pull the hair back from your eyes
Let the people see your pretty face
Try not to say anything weird
Save your questions without answers
'Til your old enough to know that things ain't as they appeared
Before you go out in the sun
Cover your skin and don't get burned
Beware the cancer, it might kill you when you're old
Be first in line, raise your hand
Remember everything you hear
And playing in the rain is worth catching cold
[Chorus]
Sooner or later
We'll be lookin' back on everything
And we'll laugh about it like we knew what all was happening
And someday you might listen to what people have to say
Now you learn the hard way
[Verse 2]
We only want what's best for you
That's why we tell you what to do
And nevermind if nothing makes sense
'Cause it all works out in the end
You're just like us without a friend
But you can build a privacy fence
[Verse 3]
Somethings you have to learn them all on your own
You can't rely on anybody else
Or the point of view of a source unknown
If it feels good and sounds nice
Then it's your choice don't doubt yourself
Don't even think twice
Pull the hair back from your eyes
Let the people see your pretty face
You know they like it when you smile (Find a reason to smile)
Try not to focus on yourself
Share that love with someone else
Don't let the bitters bring you down
Don't let anything bring you down
(sooner or later/michael tolcher)
go figure.
night y'all.
still working my way through the one year bible... when i finish with my few pages each night i occasionally bug other people about it... tonight:
me: summary of bible reading tonight: moses gets mad about strange things
me: now, lara goes to sleep
dave: that happens a lot
me: moses or sleep?
dave: moses
dave: lara sleeping should happen a lot, too
me: reuben and gad said they wanted land on the other side of the jordan from canaan to raise sheep and moses spazzed for a page about it
me: it was entertaining
me: this is the lara translation of the bible
me: what do you think?
dave: it's certainly entertaining
me: you wouldn't buy a copy if i published it, would you?
dave: i'd take a free copy
me: thanks for the vote of confidence
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
misc part 2 (completely unrelated):
song lyrics stuck in my head today are as follows:
Pull the hair back from your eyes
Let the people see your pretty face
Try not to say anything weird
Save your questions without answers
'Til your old enough to know that things ain't as they appeared
Before you go out in the sun
Cover your skin and don't get burned
Beware the cancer, it might kill you when you're old
Be first in line, raise your hand
Remember everything you hear
And playing in the rain is worth catching cold
[Chorus]
Sooner or later
We'll be lookin' back on everything
And we'll laugh about it like we knew what all was happening
And someday you might listen to what people have to say
Now you learn the hard way
[Verse 2]
We only want what's best for you
That's why we tell you what to do
And nevermind if nothing makes sense
'Cause it all works out in the end
You're just like us without a friend
But you can build a privacy fence
[Verse 3]
Somethings you have to learn them all on your own
You can't rely on anybody else
Or the point of view of a source unknown
If it feels good and sounds nice
Then it's your choice don't doubt yourself
Don't even think twice
Pull the hair back from your eyes
Let the people see your pretty face
You know they like it when you smile (Find a reason to smile)
Try not to focus on yourself
Share that love with someone else
Don't let the bitters bring you down
Don't let anything bring you down
(sooner or later/michael tolcher)
go figure.
night y'all.
teaching quotes
it was one of *those* days today... enjoy.
* me (to the room at large): you all look so tired and not excited to be here... did you at least have a good break?
students: (mixed reactions)
me: at least you didn't have to learn calculus for a whole week!
steph: trust me, going to calc recitation every day would have improved my break... seriously.
* me: and as jonathan pointed out 5 minutes ago, z=9-y^2 is a parabola in the yz-plane...
jonathan (looks extremely surprised and blurts out): she knows my name!!!!
me: dude, i know almost everyone's name, of course i know who you are!
* kenneth: hey, do you know joe? like math major undergrad joe?
me: yup, why?
kenneth: because the way you explained that is totally a joe thing to say
me: um, ok, thanks... i think... next question... zach?
zach: do you know jack?
me: i know *everyone*... next MATH question?
* me (to the room at large): you all look so tired and not excited to be here... did you at least have a good break?
students: (mixed reactions)
me: at least you didn't have to learn calculus for a whole week!
steph: trust me, going to calc recitation every day would have improved my break... seriously.
* me: and as jonathan pointed out 5 minutes ago, z=9-y^2 is a parabola in the yz-plane...
jonathan (looks extremely surprised and blurts out): she knows my name!!!!
me: dude, i know almost everyone's name, of course i know who you are!
* kenneth: hey, do you know joe? like math major undergrad joe?
me: yup, why?
kenneth: because the way you explained that is totally a joe thing to say
me: um, ok, thanks... i think... next question... zach?
zach: do you know jack?
me: i know *everyone*... next MATH question?
Monday, March 20, 2006
for the record...
... a TA is NOT a magic answer genie you can conjure up early in the morning on 15 minutes notice.
(i got an email at 9:45 this morning asking if i was going to be in my office at 10... i was still in my pajamas eating breakfast and working on my own homework and nowhere ready to leave the house in the near future... oi...)
however, a student who requests a meeting on short notice, and agrees to one later in the day at a more convenient time without complaining, who actually comes in having worked through the whole assignment and with good questions is MUCH preferable to....
a student who makes an appointment two days in advance and then comes in not having looked at the homework at all and waiting for you to just magically them tell how it all works.
frankly, i don't mind the first case at all as long as they're willing to be flexible and show they've done work. the second case is moderately frustrating, but i have no problem telling the student in person that they're not going to get anything out of the encounter and to email me questions once they've actually looked at the assignment.
eric says i'm only flooded with students all the time because they *do* like me and realize that i *do* give clear explanations, so i guess that's good.
i just wish that the prof i teach for were all about giving clear explanations too. on homework he does... on computer assignments, he doesn't have the background to explain programming commands so it all falls on me, and even if it runs me ragged, i believe my students should have *someone* to ask questions of if they're trying to do the work.
summary: my monday? computer stuff all day... plus some of my own work besides... now, time to catch up on my students homework so that i actually understand what i'm teaching tomorrow. the fun never ends.
(i got an email at 9:45 this morning asking if i was going to be in my office at 10... i was still in my pajamas eating breakfast and working on my own homework and nowhere ready to leave the house in the near future... oi...)
however, a student who requests a meeting on short notice, and agrees to one later in the day at a more convenient time without complaining, who actually comes in having worked through the whole assignment and with good questions is MUCH preferable to....
a student who makes an appointment two days in advance and then comes in not having looked at the homework at all and waiting for you to just magically them tell how it all works.
frankly, i don't mind the first case at all as long as they're willing to be flexible and show they've done work. the second case is moderately frustrating, but i have no problem telling the student in person that they're not going to get anything out of the encounter and to email me questions once they've actually looked at the assignment.
eric says i'm only flooded with students all the time because they *do* like me and realize that i *do* give clear explanations, so i guess that's good.
i just wish that the prof i teach for were all about giving clear explanations too. on homework he does... on computer assignments, he doesn't have the background to explain programming commands so it all falls on me, and even if it runs me ragged, i believe my students should have *someone* to ask questions of if they're trying to do the work.
summary: my monday? computer stuff all day... plus some of my own work besides... now, time to catch up on my students homework so that i actually understand what i'm teaching tomorrow. the fun never ends.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
revelation
scott and me just read stop that ball for the first time in ages.
revelation: replace "that ball" with "my brain" and "the string" with "my head" you have an exceedingly hilarious, mostly sensical, analogy for the life of a grad student. :P
consider the first few pages:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i hit my brain. i made it fly.
i hit my brain as it went by.
it went around and then came back.
i gave my brain another WHACK!
i hit it high.
i hit it low.
i hit so hard my head let go!
my head let go.
there went my brain.
away up high, out past the wall!
so i ran fast around the wall.
i had to get my big fat brain.
i saw it jump. i saw it roll,
and head right for an open hole.
the hole was deep. the hole was black.
how could i get my poor brain back?
what could i do?
say! this was bad!
this was the only brain i had!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
heh. night y'all. :P
revelation: replace "that ball" with "my brain" and "the string" with "my head" you have an exceedingly hilarious, mostly sensical, analogy for the life of a grad student. :P
consider the first few pages:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i hit my brain. i made it fly.
i hit my brain as it went by.
it went around and then came back.
i gave my brain another WHACK!
i hit it high.
i hit it low.
i hit so hard my head let go!
my head let go.
there went my brain.
away up high, out past the wall!
so i ran fast around the wall.
i had to get my big fat brain.
i saw it jump. i saw it roll,
and head right for an open hole.
the hole was deep. the hole was black.
how could i get my poor brain back?
what could i do?
say! this was bad!
this was the only brain i had!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
heh. night y'all. :P
dude
the visualizer on itunes is highly addicting. i thought i used to be mesmerized by the one on windows media player, but i could leave it on and get to work and not pay attention to the screen. this is not true with the itunes one (i keep catching myself staring at the pretty colors instead of doing my work... ooops)... no clue what makes this one more able to command my attention, but go figure.
the end.
the end.
yay?
*finally* done grading!
i've had "spiders" (moby) and "do you want to" (franz ferdinand) alternating in my head all night... such a weird mix...
the end.
i've had "spiders" (moby) and "do you want to" (franz ferdinand) alternating in my head all night... such a weird mix...
the end.
Friday, March 17, 2006
happy friday?
i've been so sluggish on doing my own work this week... obviously gone up until wednesday night, but then, yesterday, other than tutoring for 2 hours, i spent time playing with CDs and downloading album art into itunes for all my CDs (itunes doesn't automatically put the art in when you copy in a CD you own instead of buying stuff online)... ever so important and productive, i know. :P
today was good... jessica and i spent the day wandering around peddler's village, just over the border into PA. it's a cute collection of small shops with lots of random stuff. i came home with several non-math books for some leisure reading, and some candy. jessica ended up with some cool jewelry. mostly it was nice to have a slow day and to chat for awhile. it made me happy.
now that i'm back home though, i've finally convinced myself to get grading/writing a quiz for my students out of the way. i hate grading workshops. i believe that they're valuable for the students to practice writing technical prose, and that they should get good feedback on them to help them improve their writing, but making worthwhile comments and actually grading prose instead of right or wrong computations takes a lot more energy. so far i've made it through 1 section worth of papers, and have 2 sections to go. i'll be glad when it's done.
periodically i get incredibly frustrated with myself. i put a LOT of energy into doing things well for my students and other people i work with, and i really want them all to do well. i was sad to see the spread on my students' midterms, but some of the mistakes i saw made sense what they were thinking. i just wish that if they're stuck they'd ask questions rather than struggling through on their own. i *want* them to do well, really i do, and i wish i knew what i could do to make things go more smoothly for some of them. i get the class to talk to me a lot during recitations so that they're actually showing me what they know instead of me droning... i send weekly reminder emails to them of what all's going on and always include a plug for office hours. i already hold double the amount of office hours required just to be convenient and i answer emails in detail at all hours of the day and night etc., etc., etc. i'm as available as i can be (and more so than the average TA) and in class i get them to talk to me and be interactive... i'm doing all my energy level can handle to do plus some, and yet many students are really struggling. i know that it's a two way street and they have to put the effort in too, but i really wish there was more i could do to see more universally positive results.
in the same vein, i thought working with my directed reading program mentee was going really well, up until yesterday when he wrote me an essay to cancel our meeting for this week. he basically said he's realized he doesn't think he's quite ready for the competative nature of math and needs time to explore other things and he's dropping the program for now. from what all he wrote, there are bigger things going on than our meetings that he's processing and deciding what's best for him, which is good. just his essay came as a complete surprise to me, and i wish we could have at least discussed to see if we could format our meetings differently to be more helpful to him or something first. i was kinda sad when i read all he had to say, even though i completely respect it.
summary: i've had a great week of escape, but now i'm getting back to work. i hate grading workshops, and although i'd like to think i'm good at teaching/mentoring, other circumstances (blant lies about math and unclear writing on workshops... my mentee dropping the reading program without warning) make me question myself, and it's frustrating.
hopefully i'll get over myself and cheer up by monday... we'll see... in the meantime, back to grading for me. woohoo?
night y'all.
today was good... jessica and i spent the day wandering around peddler's village, just over the border into PA. it's a cute collection of small shops with lots of random stuff. i came home with several non-math books for some leisure reading, and some candy. jessica ended up with some cool jewelry. mostly it was nice to have a slow day and to chat for awhile. it made me happy.
now that i'm back home though, i've finally convinced myself to get grading/writing a quiz for my students out of the way. i hate grading workshops. i believe that they're valuable for the students to practice writing technical prose, and that they should get good feedback on them to help them improve their writing, but making worthwhile comments and actually grading prose instead of right or wrong computations takes a lot more energy. so far i've made it through 1 section worth of papers, and have 2 sections to go. i'll be glad when it's done.
periodically i get incredibly frustrated with myself. i put a LOT of energy into doing things well for my students and other people i work with, and i really want them all to do well. i was sad to see the spread on my students' midterms, but some of the mistakes i saw made sense what they were thinking. i just wish that if they're stuck they'd ask questions rather than struggling through on their own. i *want* them to do well, really i do, and i wish i knew what i could do to make things go more smoothly for some of them. i get the class to talk to me a lot during recitations so that they're actually showing me what they know instead of me droning... i send weekly reminder emails to them of what all's going on and always include a plug for office hours. i already hold double the amount of office hours required just to be convenient and i answer emails in detail at all hours of the day and night etc., etc., etc. i'm as available as i can be (and more so than the average TA) and in class i get them to talk to me and be interactive... i'm doing all my energy level can handle to do plus some, and yet many students are really struggling. i know that it's a two way street and they have to put the effort in too, but i really wish there was more i could do to see more universally positive results.
in the same vein, i thought working with my directed reading program mentee was going really well, up until yesterday when he wrote me an essay to cancel our meeting for this week. he basically said he's realized he doesn't think he's quite ready for the competative nature of math and needs time to explore other things and he's dropping the program for now. from what all he wrote, there are bigger things going on than our meetings that he's processing and deciding what's best for him, which is good. just his essay came as a complete surprise to me, and i wish we could have at least discussed to see if we could format our meetings differently to be more helpful to him or something first. i was kinda sad when i read all he had to say, even though i completely respect it.
summary: i've had a great week of escape, but now i'm getting back to work. i hate grading workshops, and although i'd like to think i'm good at teaching/mentoring, other circumstances (blant lies about math and unclear writing on workshops... my mentee dropping the reading program without warning) make me question myself, and it's frustrating.
hopefully i'll get over myself and cheer up by monday... we'll see... in the meantime, back to grading for me. woohoo?
night y'all.
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
"maine" -- the very brief summary:
now that i've been back in jersey for a little over and hour and just finished catching up with email from the past 4 days, here's a quote from an email i just wrote:
"we left sunday afternoon for "maine", and got back about an hour ago... pictures will be ready for me to pick up in 20 minutes. maine really means a night is rhode island, a night in maine, and a night in upstate new york with a tour of the ben and jerry's factory, beer flavored ice cream, a large bottle of whiskey, getting stranded in a thunderstorm on a small island, meeting a life-sized moose made out of chocolate, getting free drinks at a serendipitous middle-of-nowhere diner, meeting plymouth rock, scott trying to do pushups with me on his back, and yelling our lungs out at frozen lake champlain at 10:30 at night."
more details when i get pictures back (in 20 minutes) and actually scanned into the computer (later tonight, or tomorrow)
happy wednesday y'all! :P
"we left sunday afternoon for "maine", and got back about an hour ago... pictures will be ready for me to pick up in 20 minutes. maine really means a night is rhode island, a night in maine, and a night in upstate new york with a tour of the ben and jerry's factory, beer flavored ice cream, a large bottle of whiskey, getting stranded in a thunderstorm on a small island, meeting a life-sized moose made out of chocolate, getting free drinks at a serendipitous middle-of-nowhere diner, meeting plymouth rock, scott trying to do pushups with me on his back, and yelling our lungs out at frozen lake champlain at 10:30 at night."
more details when i get pictures back (in 20 minutes) and actually scanned into the computer (later tonight, or tomorrow)
happy wednesday y'all! :P
Sunday, March 12, 2006
sunday bloody sunday
* we woke up 2 hours ago to our hot water being out... this happens from time to time. we have a crazy oil-powered furnace that we drain every week or so. from time to time it goes out, and we have to reset it. we reset it 5 times this morning before giving up. this means colleen and leigh and i all got no showers and we all feel gross. at least for colleen and me... she was on a hike yesterday, and i walk/jogged 5 miles last night, so both of us were not in perfectly clean condition. :P... my last resort was to boil water on the stove and deal with that to at least handle the hair and wash my face... either way, i'm crossing my fingers for a hot shower after church and before leaving for maine.
* scott emailed me at 6am. he was at a concert in NY last night... but stopped at a bookstore to get a cool book to help us make more informed decisions about what to do in maine... apparently while leaving the bookstore, his car got hit... he's fine, but his car is not, so he's not the happiest. (and he's been asleep for less than 4 hours now)
* i'm so behind on phone calls and being in touch with friends. last weekend was rough emotionally... my students have been stressed on account of their midterm grades which means they've been talking to me even more than normal about things, which is fine, just adds to the overall busy-ness level... i'm behind on stuff i should have been working on for dr. z.... and the list goes on and on and on... the hot water issue this morning was just icing on the cake.
summary: i feel completely disgusting and exhausted. scott is exhausted and stressed for different reasons. we both really NEED a few days of non-math to eat good seafood, have no demands on our schedules whatsoever, and to go out in the middle of nowhere and scream our heads off. and if we raid the ben and jerrys factory in vermont while we're at it and fill ourselves with sinfully good dessert after maine, more power to us. the next 4 days in maine, new hampshire, vermont, rhode island, canada, or whereever the heck we end up will be a much needed break, and i can't wait.
catch y'all on wednesday.
* scott emailed me at 6am. he was at a concert in NY last night... but stopped at a bookstore to get a cool book to help us make more informed decisions about what to do in maine... apparently while leaving the bookstore, his car got hit... he's fine, but his car is not, so he's not the happiest. (and he's been asleep for less than 4 hours now)
* i'm so behind on phone calls and being in touch with friends. last weekend was rough emotionally... my students have been stressed on account of their midterm grades which means they've been talking to me even more than normal about things, which is fine, just adds to the overall busy-ness level... i'm behind on stuff i should have been working on for dr. z.... and the list goes on and on and on... the hot water issue this morning was just icing on the cake.
summary: i feel completely disgusting and exhausted. scott is exhausted and stressed for different reasons. we both really NEED a few days of non-math to eat good seafood, have no demands on our schedules whatsoever, and to go out in the middle of nowhere and scream our heads off. and if we raid the ben and jerrys factory in vermont while we're at it and fill ourselves with sinfully good dessert after maine, more power to us. the next 4 days in maine, new hampshire, vermont, rhode island, canada, or whereever the heck we end up will be a much needed break, and i can't wait.
catch y'all on wednesday.
Saturday, March 11, 2006
100 CDs
tomorrow, scott and i take off for maine. i have warm clothes, i have my telescope already in my car (how often do i get that far away from the NY lights?), i have snacks, and a fully charged ipod (with a brand new converter that lets me charge it from a wall not just from a usb port)), and i just finished the most important part -- picking what CDs to throw in the car... scott and i are both really big on music going ALL THE TIME, so having a good selection for 4 days in the car is key. he'll bring his own besides, but i just sat down and filled my 96 CD book with whatever i could reach that sounds reasonable to throw in in the next few days... of course not all will be listened to in the course of the trip, but whatever, options are good...
to further exhibit my bizarre/eclectic taste in music here's the top 96 CDs that just got pulled from my shelf for the trip (the first 40 or so were already in the case and got to stay, the rest were added)
1. coldplay -- parachutes
2. coldplay -- a rush of blood to the head
3. josh kelley -- for the ride home
4. guster -- keep it together
5. barenaked ladies -- all their greatest hits
6. cat stevens -- the very best of cat stevens
7. maroon5 -- songs about jane
8. the calling -- camino palmero
9. sting -- fields of gold: the best of sting
10. sting -- brand new day
11. lifehouse -- no name face
12. lifehouse -- stanley climbfall
13. better than ezra -- deluxe
14. better than ezra -- closer
15. john mayer -- room for squares/inside wants out
16. train -- train
17. train -- drops of jupiter
18. train -- my private nation
19. lilo and stitch soundtrack
20. tarzan soundtrack
21. country mix for lara (courtesy of jessica)
22. elvis -- 30 #1 hits
23. phantom of the opera soundtrack, disc 1
24. phantom of the opera sountrack, disc 2
25. cats soundtrack, disc 1
26. cats soundtrack, disc 2
27. the producers soundtrack
28. aida soundtrack
29. mxpx -- life in general
30. mxpx -- slowly going the way of the buffalo
31. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 1
32. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 2
33. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 3
34. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 4
35. savatage mix (courtesy of travis)
36. eric's CD of "WOW" (courtesy of eric)
37. songs for my friends 2004 (courtesy of nicole)
38. the most random CD ever (courtesy of me)
39. skillet -- alien youth
40. switchfoot -- the beautiful letdown
41. exit east -- exit east
42. toby keith -- greatest hits
43. switchfoot -- learning to breathe
44. swtichfoot -- the legend of chin
45. relient k -- mmhmm
46. switchfoot -- new way to be human
47. chris rice -- short term memories
48. relient k -- two lefts don't make a right... but three do
49. delirious -- glo
50. delirious -- mezzamorphis
51. mellow mix (april 2005) -- (mine)
52. calm mix (april 2005) -- (mine)
53. joy mix (april 2005) -- (mine)
54. eh mix (september 2005) -- (mine)
55. eh mix 2.0 (march 2006) -- (mine, see previous post)
56. johnny cash -- 16 biggest hits
57. garden state soundtrack
58. scrubs season one soundtrack
59. movin' out soundtrack
60. kirk franklin's nu nation -- God's property
61. rent soundtrack, disc 1
62. rent soundtrack, disc 2
63. dixie chicks -- top of the world, disc 1
64. dixie chicks -- top of the world, disc 2
65. coldplay -- x&y
66. mxpx -- before everything and after
67. madonna -- confessions on a dance floor
68. james blunt -- back to bedlam
69. kirk franklin -- hero
70. barlowgirl -- another journal entry
71. patty griffin -- a kiss in time
72. patty griffin -- impossible dream
73. patty griffin -- living with ghosts
74. schmidt vera -- nezhetnelek
75. princess -- a hegedu hercegnoi
76. princess -- hegeduvarasz
77. princess -- tancok buvoleteben
78. burlap to cashmere -- anybody out there
79. enya -- a day without rain/the memory of trees
80. jars of clay -- the eleventh hour
81. brother bear soundtrack
82. bend it like beckham soundtrack
83. memphis: the album (courtesy of memphis jenny)
84. michelle tumes -- listen
85. michelle tumes -- center of my universe
86. michelle tumes -- dream
87. groovehouse -- hajnal
88. unique -- uttalan utakon
89. las ketchup -- hijas del tomate
90. best of communism: a selection of revolutionary songs
91. michael w. smith -- freedom
92. the simply fabulous $1.99 new music sampler
93. savatage -- dead winter dead
94. third day -- conspiracy #5
95. lost and found -- live at valpo, disc 1
96. lost and found -- live at valpo, disc 2
ta da, and all that jazz... the end :P
to further exhibit my bizarre/eclectic taste in music here's the top 96 CDs that just got pulled from my shelf for the trip (the first 40 or so were already in the case and got to stay, the rest were added)
1. coldplay -- parachutes
2. coldplay -- a rush of blood to the head
3. josh kelley -- for the ride home
4. guster -- keep it together
5. barenaked ladies -- all their greatest hits
6. cat stevens -- the very best of cat stevens
7. maroon5 -- songs about jane
8. the calling -- camino palmero
9. sting -- fields of gold: the best of sting
10. sting -- brand new day
11. lifehouse -- no name face
12. lifehouse -- stanley climbfall
13. better than ezra -- deluxe
14. better than ezra -- closer
15. john mayer -- room for squares/inside wants out
16. train -- train
17. train -- drops of jupiter
18. train -- my private nation
19. lilo and stitch soundtrack
20. tarzan soundtrack
21. country mix for lara (courtesy of jessica)
22. elvis -- 30 #1 hits
23. phantom of the opera soundtrack, disc 1
24. phantom of the opera sountrack, disc 2
25. cats soundtrack, disc 1
26. cats soundtrack, disc 2
27. the producers soundtrack
28. aida soundtrack
29. mxpx -- life in general
30. mxpx -- slowly going the way of the buffalo
31. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 1
32. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 2
33. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 3
34. billy joel -- greatest hits volume 4
35. savatage mix (courtesy of travis)
36. eric's CD of "WOW" (courtesy of eric)
37. songs for my friends 2004 (courtesy of nicole)
38. the most random CD ever (courtesy of me)
39. skillet -- alien youth
40. switchfoot -- the beautiful letdown
41. exit east -- exit east
42. toby keith -- greatest hits
43. switchfoot -- learning to breathe
44. swtichfoot -- the legend of chin
45. relient k -- mmhmm
46. switchfoot -- new way to be human
47. chris rice -- short term memories
48. relient k -- two lefts don't make a right... but three do
49. delirious -- glo
50. delirious -- mezzamorphis
51. mellow mix (april 2005) -- (mine)
52. calm mix (april 2005) -- (mine)
53. joy mix (april 2005) -- (mine)
54. eh mix (september 2005) -- (mine)
55. eh mix 2.0 (march 2006) -- (mine, see previous post)
56. johnny cash -- 16 biggest hits
57. garden state soundtrack
58. scrubs season one soundtrack
59. movin' out soundtrack
60. kirk franklin's nu nation -- God's property
61. rent soundtrack, disc 1
62. rent soundtrack, disc 2
63. dixie chicks -- top of the world, disc 1
64. dixie chicks -- top of the world, disc 2
65. coldplay -- x&y
66. mxpx -- before everything and after
67. madonna -- confessions on a dance floor
68. james blunt -- back to bedlam
69. kirk franklin -- hero
70. barlowgirl -- another journal entry
71. patty griffin -- a kiss in time
72. patty griffin -- impossible dream
73. patty griffin -- living with ghosts
74. schmidt vera -- nezhetnelek
75. princess -- a hegedu hercegnoi
76. princess -- hegeduvarasz
77. princess -- tancok buvoleteben
78. burlap to cashmere -- anybody out there
79. enya -- a day without rain/the memory of trees
80. jars of clay -- the eleventh hour
81. brother bear soundtrack
82. bend it like beckham soundtrack
83. memphis: the album (courtesy of memphis jenny)
84. michelle tumes -- listen
85. michelle tumes -- center of my universe
86. michelle tumes -- dream
87. groovehouse -- hajnal
88. unique -- uttalan utakon
89. las ketchup -- hijas del tomate
90. best of communism: a selection of revolutionary songs
91. michael w. smith -- freedom
92. the simply fabulous $1.99 new music sampler
93. savatage -- dead winter dead
94. third day -- conspiracy #5
95. lost and found -- live at valpo, disc 1
96. lost and found -- live at valpo, disc 2
ta da, and all that jazz... the end :P
new playlist
what does this say about my mood today?
1. Ebudae (Enya)
2. Everyday People (Nicole C. Mullen)
3. Sooner or Later (Michael Tolcher)
4. All Will Be Well (The Gabe Dixon Band)
5. This Isn't What We Meant (Savatage)
6. Who I Am Hates Who I've Been (Relient K)
7. I So Hate Consequences (Relient K)
8. The One I'm Waiting For (Relient K)
9. Be My Escape (Relient K)
10. High of 75 (Relient K)
11. Redemption (Switchfoot)
12. Tempus Vernum (Enya)
13. Not What You See (Savatage)
14. Mirror (BarlowGirl)
15. All I Know (Art Garfunkel)
16. Imagine Me (Kirk Franklin)
17. Better (Kirk Franklin)
18. Only If... (Enya)
19. Enough (BarlowGirl)
20. Everybody Free (Michael W. Smith)
21. When You Believe (Prince of Egypt soundtrack)
1. Ebudae (Enya)
2. Everyday People (Nicole C. Mullen)
3. Sooner or Later (Michael Tolcher)
4. All Will Be Well (The Gabe Dixon Band)
5. This Isn't What We Meant (Savatage)
6. Who I Am Hates Who I've Been (Relient K)
7. I So Hate Consequences (Relient K)
8. The One I'm Waiting For (Relient K)
9. Be My Escape (Relient K)
10. High of 75 (Relient K)
11. Redemption (Switchfoot)
12. Tempus Vernum (Enya)
13. Not What You See (Savatage)
14. Mirror (BarlowGirl)
15. All I Know (Art Garfunkel)
16. Imagine Me (Kirk Franklin)
17. Better (Kirk Franklin)
18. Only If... (Enya)
19. Enough (BarlowGirl)
20. Everybody Free (Michael W. Smith)
21. When You Believe (Prince of Egypt soundtrack)
creed of the modern thinker
this struck a chord earlier in the week. i disagree with most of the lines, but i thought it was well written and an intriguing thinking topic/point of discussion... reactions?:
Modern Thinker's Creed
Steve Turner, English journalist
We believe in Marx, Freud and Darwin. We believe everything is okay, as long as you don’t hurt anyone to the best of your definition of hurt and to your best definition of knowledge.
We believe in sex before, during and after marriage. We believe in the therapy of sin. We believe that adultery is fun. We believe that sodomy is okay. We believe that taboos are taboo.
We believe that everything is getting better despite evidence to the contrary. The evidence must be investigated and you can prove anything with evidence. We believe there is something in horoscopes, UFO’s, and bent spoons.
Jesus was a good man just like Buddha, Mohammad and ourselves. He was a good moral teacher, although we think basically his good morals were really bad. We believe that all religions are the basically the same, at least the ones we read were. They all believe in love and goodness. They only differ on matters of creation, sin, heaven, hell, God and salvation.
We believe that after death comes nothing because when you ask the dead what happens they say nothing. If death is not the end, and if the dead have lied, then it’s compulsively heaven for all except perhaps Hitler, Stalin and Genghis Kahn.
We believe in Masters and Johnson. What is selected is average, what’s average is normal, and what’s normal is good.
We believe in total disarmament. We believe there are direct links between warfare and bloodshed. Americans should beat their guns into tractors and the Russians would be sure to follow.
We believe that man is essentially good-it’s only his behavior that lets him down. This is the fault of society; society’s the fault of condition; and conditions are the fault of society.
We believe that each man must find the truth that is right for him and reality will adapt accordingly; the universe will readjust and history will alter. We believe that there is no absolute truth, except the truth that there is no absolute truth.
We believe in the rejection of creeds and the flowering of individual thought.
If Chance be the Father of all flesh, disaster is His rainbow in the sky. And when you hear: “State of Emergency,” “Sniper Kills Ten,” “Troops on Rampage,” “Youths go Looting,” “Bomb Blasts School,” it is but the sound man worshipping his maker.
Modern Thinker's Creed
Steve Turner, English journalist
We believe in Marx, Freud and Darwin. We believe everything is okay, as long as you don’t hurt anyone to the best of your definition of hurt and to your best definition of knowledge.
We believe in sex before, during and after marriage. We believe in the therapy of sin. We believe that adultery is fun. We believe that sodomy is okay. We believe that taboos are taboo.
We believe that everything is getting better despite evidence to the contrary. The evidence must be investigated and you can prove anything with evidence. We believe there is something in horoscopes, UFO’s, and bent spoons.
Jesus was a good man just like Buddha, Mohammad and ourselves. He was a good moral teacher, although we think basically his good morals were really bad. We believe that all religions are the basically the same, at least the ones we read were. They all believe in love and goodness. They only differ on matters of creation, sin, heaven, hell, God and salvation.
We believe that after death comes nothing because when you ask the dead what happens they say nothing. If death is not the end, and if the dead have lied, then it’s compulsively heaven for all except perhaps Hitler, Stalin and Genghis Kahn.
We believe in Masters and Johnson. What is selected is average, what’s average is normal, and what’s normal is good.
We believe in total disarmament. We believe there are direct links between warfare and bloodshed. Americans should beat their guns into tractors and the Russians would be sure to follow.
We believe that man is essentially good-it’s only his behavior that lets him down. This is the fault of society; society’s the fault of condition; and conditions are the fault of society.
We believe that each man must find the truth that is right for him and reality will adapt accordingly; the universe will readjust and history will alter. We believe that there is no absolute truth, except the truth that there is no absolute truth.
We believe in the rejection of creeds and the flowering of individual thought.
If Chance be the Father of all flesh, disaster is His rainbow in the sky. And when you hear: “State of Emergency,” “Sniper Kills Ten,” “Troops on Rampage,” “Youths go Looting,” “Bomb Blasts School,” it is but the sound man worshipping his maker.
mass apology
to any and everyone i've ever offended/hurt with a rant on here written to vent anger or frustration, especially if it wasn't really justified. i'm sorry.
i overstate things when i'm in a sour mood, and typing's my therapy, whether what i type is accurate or not. in the future, i'll try to keep my typewritten rants to myself instead of mass posted.
i suck, really i do.... and i'm sorry.
i overstate things when i'm in a sour mood, and typing's my therapy, whether what i type is accurate or not. in the future, i'll try to keep my typewritten rants to myself instead of mass posted.
i suck, really i do.... and i'm sorry.
Friday, March 10, 2006
random
jessica and i were sitting around listening to the 11pm news just now, when lo and behold one of our HS classmates appeared on the news. they were interviewing him briefly (half a sentence) since he was stranded at the JFK when the airport was shut down for an hour earlier today from security concerns. it listed him as being from greenwich village. it took me 5 second to put name and face together and where i knew him from, but it totally fit.
go figure.
tonight's been great. arrested development is a pretty funny show. margaritas are always fantastic. so is catching up with friends... i'm soooooooo exhausted though. officially time to crash.
night y'all.
go figure.
tonight's been great. arrested development is a pretty funny show. margaritas are always fantastic. so is catching up with friends... i'm soooooooo exhausted though. officially time to crash.
night y'all.
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
dna
apparently i'm an independent inventor... what about you?
and while we're on that. go here, with receipt 7f3a011b8993 and see how well you can pin me down yourself :-P
and while we're on that. go here, with receipt 7f3a011b8993 and see how well you can pin me down yourself :-P
baby llama!
born at my parents' house last month.
it's a girl. she was born with 3.5 legs, but quickly figured out how to get around fast as a tripod... go figure... she's cute though, isn't she?
i'll meet the 3-legged llama in may.
the end.
it's a girl. she was born with 3.5 legs, but quickly figured out how to get around fast as a tripod... go figure... she's cute though, isn't she?
i'll meet the 3-legged llama in may.
the end.
yay
things to look forward to:
spring break is next week, hence lara is going to have some fun.
* friday, jessica's coming up to visit. we haven't gotten to hang out since december (i had been studying non stop for a few months and avoiding too much fun during that bit course). the plan is to get dinner and then hang out in front of the TV/dvd player. my grad school friends don't bond that way with me, so i'm just looking forward to an enjoyably lazy evening. it's always good to catch up with old friends where you don't have to be doing something horribly dramatic to have a good time. :P
* scott and i have decided to re-create spring break of 2 years ago... (see this post). after i had visited my friend marianne at dartmouth that break, i had been to every state east of the mississippi river except delware, which was just 1.5 hours away... so i convinced scott to go to delaware for lunch with me, and we ended up making a day of it (quite literally)... it was a blast. mostly it was so fantastic because there was no itinerary whatsoever... things along the lines of "have you ever seen (fill in the blank)? it's only 100 miles away" determined the day. this time, though, we're going north instead of south... scott's never been to VT, NH, ME, or RI, so we'll help him knock those off the list. i am incredibly looking forward to a trip with no goals except "take ridiculous pictures at state lines"... and to being able to get out of the car in the middle of nowhere with a good friend and just scream at the top of my lungs and not care. it'll be a fantastic release of stress. :P a week from now, you can look forward to the post about "maine trip 2006". guaranteed to be a blast.
* perhaps, after maine, jessica and i will get to get together again. that would be great too, so keeping fingers crossed.
summary: i have good friends, and non-math plans 3 fridays running now... my life is significantly more entertaining than it's been in months. :)
the end.
spring break is next week, hence lara is going to have some fun.
* friday, jessica's coming up to visit. we haven't gotten to hang out since december (i had been studying non stop for a few months and avoiding too much fun during that bit course). the plan is to get dinner and then hang out in front of the TV/dvd player. my grad school friends don't bond that way with me, so i'm just looking forward to an enjoyably lazy evening. it's always good to catch up with old friends where you don't have to be doing something horribly dramatic to have a good time. :P
* scott and i have decided to re-create spring break of 2 years ago... (see this post). after i had visited my friend marianne at dartmouth that break, i had been to every state east of the mississippi river except delware, which was just 1.5 hours away... so i convinced scott to go to delaware for lunch with me, and we ended up making a day of it (quite literally)... it was a blast. mostly it was so fantastic because there was no itinerary whatsoever... things along the lines of "have you ever seen (fill in the blank)? it's only 100 miles away" determined the day. this time, though, we're going north instead of south... scott's never been to VT, NH, ME, or RI, so we'll help him knock those off the list. i am incredibly looking forward to a trip with no goals except "take ridiculous pictures at state lines"... and to being able to get out of the car in the middle of nowhere with a good friend and just scream at the top of my lungs and not care. it'll be a fantastic release of stress. :P a week from now, you can look forward to the post about "maine trip 2006". guaranteed to be a blast.
* perhaps, after maine, jessica and i will get to get together again. that would be great too, so keeping fingers crossed.
summary: i have good friends, and non-math plans 3 fridays running now... my life is significantly more entertaining than it's been in months. :)
the end.
Monday, March 06, 2006
dude
my students totally got hosed.
i feel really bad for them. i graded 4 out of the 8 problems on their midterms last week, grading fairly generously. then the prof graded the other 4. on 12-13 point problems, if the students at least started with the correct partial derivatives or something even if they totally screwed up later, i give partial credit. the prof gave flat out 0s straight down the page to a lot of people.
i mean, i was ticked while i was grading that 6/8 problems were straight out of the homework... problems that we did in class on the board together, etc., and they still screwed them up even with a formula sheet... how hard is it to say "ok, i know the right formula, now i just plug numbers into it?". apparently, very, which makes me sad. of the other two problems, one was straight out of the lecture before the exam, which is fair... and the other was a trick that i thought was unfair... but there should have been a lot more people that got close to 7/8 of the points possible instead of a handful and a lot of grades in the 30s, 40s, and 50s (out of 100). i'm gonna make these kids cry tomorrow....
doht.
seriously... i try to make class as engaging and discussion oriented as possible. they ask me questions and i think they're getting excited and understanding. other than problem 5, i thought it was a reasonable exam, but many of them totally screwed it up anyhow. i dunno... am i entertaining but a failure at getting information across in a clear and meaningful manner? or is the prof just that much more rough than i am?
i don't know, but i'm totally dreading my job tomorrow morning.
yuck.
i feel really bad for them. i graded 4 out of the 8 problems on their midterms last week, grading fairly generously. then the prof graded the other 4. on 12-13 point problems, if the students at least started with the correct partial derivatives or something even if they totally screwed up later, i give partial credit. the prof gave flat out 0s straight down the page to a lot of people.
i mean, i was ticked while i was grading that 6/8 problems were straight out of the homework... problems that we did in class on the board together, etc., and they still screwed them up even with a formula sheet... how hard is it to say "ok, i know the right formula, now i just plug numbers into it?". apparently, very, which makes me sad. of the other two problems, one was straight out of the lecture before the exam, which is fair... and the other was a trick that i thought was unfair... but there should have been a lot more people that got close to 7/8 of the points possible instead of a handful and a lot of grades in the 30s, 40s, and 50s (out of 100). i'm gonna make these kids cry tomorrow....
doht.
seriously... i try to make class as engaging and discussion oriented as possible. they ask me questions and i think they're getting excited and understanding. other than problem 5, i thought it was a reasonable exam, but many of them totally screwed it up anyhow. i dunno... am i entertaining but a failure at getting information across in a clear and meaningful manner? or is the prof just that much more rough than i am?
i don't know, but i'm totally dreading my job tomorrow morning.
yuck.
Sunday, March 05, 2006
:(
for all the good things i had to say friday night, there is no 3rd date.
if this is what a breakup feels like after 2 dates, i don't want to imagine how it feels later on.
i feel like crap, and am considering moving to antarctica soon (not literally, but it sure sounds good right now).
i'm swearing off making new friends temporarily too if this is one of the hazards... :P
don't i sound fantastic?
happy sunday?...
if this is what a breakup feels like after 2 dates, i don't want to imagine how it feels later on.
i feel like crap, and am considering moving to antarctica soon (not literally, but it sure sounds good right now).
i'm swearing off making new friends temporarily too if this is one of the hazards... :P
don't i sound fantastic?
happy sunday?...
Saturday, March 04, 2006
heh :-D
in the past 6-7 hours...
*the view from the staten island ferry is beautiful after dark
*only in new york do you get off the subway and immediately get offered condoms by a bum... while on a second date this is quite a bit strange to react to
*yay for german pubs for dinner -- thanks to them i had half and half beer and 7up... it's quite unique. :P
*even bigger yay for wonderfully smelling tea-shops
*i discovered i actually like guinness. (does this make me weird?) (the very irish bartender told glenn he extra approves of me)
*washington square is also really beautiful after dark.
*hot cider is extra wonderful after freezing your nose off in washington square in below freezing weather
*the staten island ferry is just as beautiful at 11:30pm as it is at 6:30pm if not better.
i'm feeling fairly warm and fuzzy, and like i won't be asleep for quite some time yet... suffice it to say, tonight was a really good night. :)
*the view from the staten island ferry is beautiful after dark
*only in new york do you get off the subway and immediately get offered condoms by a bum... while on a second date this is quite a bit strange to react to
*yay for german pubs for dinner -- thanks to them i had half and half beer and 7up... it's quite unique. :P
*even bigger yay for wonderfully smelling tea-shops
*i discovered i actually like guinness. (does this make me weird?) (the very irish bartender told glenn he extra approves of me)
*washington square is also really beautiful after dark.
*hot cider is extra wonderful after freezing your nose off in washington square in below freezing weather
*the staten island ferry is just as beautiful at 11:30pm as it is at 6:30pm if not better.
i'm feeling fairly warm and fuzzy, and like i won't be asleep for quite some time yet... suffice it to say, tonight was a really good night. :)
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
heh
courtesy of jenny:
today's Ph.D. comic is so 2 weeks ago for me :-P
however instead of the prof in question sitting at home reading a paper, in my case, he was home worrying about a dentist appointment later in the day... sometimes real life *is* stranger than fiction. ;-P
later dudes.
today's Ph.D. comic is so 2 weeks ago for me :-P
however instead of the prof in question sitting at home reading a paper, in my case, he was home worrying about a dentist appointment later in the day... sometimes real life *is* stranger than fiction. ;-P
later dudes.
ode to grading midterms...
students baffle me.
the exam that the prof i TA for gave on monday was 8 problems. 6 were direct quotes from homework we had discussed in depth in recitation. they were told repeatedly that the exam would look just like homework. they had a formula sheet a week in advance to know exactly what formulas they'd have and what they had to memorize. it was not meant to be a stressful ordeal.
even with formula sheet and having seen *every* problem done before, about 1/3 of the students have done well on the first two problems i've graded (i need to grade more tonight). the problem i'm grading next was a computation with a formula exactly on the formula sheet... no sweat, right? even writing the formula down as the first thing on their papers, i found about 3 right answers in the first 30 i've glanced over... and 2 more that made a small arithmetic error on the way... not a clue what the other 24 students tried to do.
frankly, i'm confused.
... and sad. it's easy to grade right papers, and hard to fairly divide up partial credit. i *want* them to do well, but i can't give them good grades for telling lies, especially when they have the formulas right in front of them.
oi....
the end.
the exam that the prof i TA for gave on monday was 8 problems. 6 were direct quotes from homework we had discussed in depth in recitation. they were told repeatedly that the exam would look just like homework. they had a formula sheet a week in advance to know exactly what formulas they'd have and what they had to memorize. it was not meant to be a stressful ordeal.
even with formula sheet and having seen *every* problem done before, about 1/3 of the students have done well on the first two problems i've graded (i need to grade more tonight). the problem i'm grading next was a computation with a formula exactly on the formula sheet... no sweat, right? even writing the formula down as the first thing on their papers, i found about 3 right answers in the first 30 i've glanced over... and 2 more that made a small arithmetic error on the way... not a clue what the other 24 students tried to do.
frankly, i'm confused.
... and sad. it's easy to grade right papers, and hard to fairly divide up partial credit. i *want* them to do well, but i can't give them good grades for telling lies, especially when they have the formulas right in front of them.
oi....
the end.
