prayer request

my aunt in pittsburgh just called

she commented that she didn't want me to have to wait for my mom to get her message and call me, so she figured she'd call me herself (a sign that something BIG is afoot)

apparently my grandma schumann/fischer (mom's mom, g-ma who's been in a nursing home for 5 years now) is "in a failing condition" and is being rushed to the emergency room. priscilla (my aunt) said she knew nothing else, but she was en route to the hospital and would call in the next couple hours when she knew more.

irony? i called my mom immediately (assuming she had gotten a message from pris before i did) and i was the one who broke the news to her.

seriously, when priscilla said that news above, i started shaking and felt like my gut fell through the floor and the wind got knocked out of me.

not for certain, but apparently there's a high probability i'll be travelling to pittsburgh in the near future. this will be the weirdest yet (in terms of family funerals) when it does happen (looks like soon, but nothings for certain), because while i've already dealt with losing both of my grandfathers, grandma schumann has always been the most of a friend to me of all my grandparents. she was my penpal for years, and has treated me as an equal and been supportive of what i've done with my life. even after her strokes she's been thoroughly interested in knowing what i'm up to. it's been a gradual letting go process for years as she becomes increasingly physically limited, but it's still gonna hurt like heck when she's officially gone and not there for even small chats anymore.

to summarize, prayers for my grandma, that she's not in pain whatever goes down today; prayers for my aunt priscilla as she's the one family member responding first hand; and prayers for the rest of the family as we see what comes next.

i'm still shaking.

update later.